BRAND Homebrand TV #2 Retro Repost

Longview, Texas, woke up and came out in droves despite the torture that has been plaguing Texas with the wind and the rain. 432 good folk come out to see the second delivery of Homebrand TV and they were not left without huge grins on their faces.

Firstly, through the week, Scoot Johnson made apologies for missing the tapings for Branded Superstars but has pledged to make it to the next recording for his fans and we’re all excited to see him get back in front of the camera. His match tonight was for the big one. Getting that number one contendership to save his contract for a title shot at a later date.

Homebrand kicked off with a bang as Sharc had interrupted to locals in a dark match. Youngsters Bob Leary and John Vincent were attempting to put on a show for the fans when the BRAND Name Champion emerged through the crowd and hit both kids with the Blood in the Water. Stomping away Sharc was demanding his title belt for a whole fifteen minutes. Joe Bananas burst from the back with a steel chair, stepping into the defend the Texan kids. Sharc simply stood back, the pair in deadlock not willing to make a move. Sharc mocked Joe’s Branded Superstars promo before Sharc began to tell Joe that he had already lost and pleaded for Bananas to hit him. Bananas tossed the chair to the ringfloor, shaking his head and leaving the champ in the ring as he left with Leary and Vincent. There was pure tension and it’s gives you the idea of what could happen should they meet later down the line when Bananas can get some experience under his belt.

Ringo Boulder v. Shawn FoX
Ringo Boulder and Shawn FoX came out to take on one another in singles competition for a Loser Leaves Town match, with Boulder expected to make FoX accountable for no showing the debut of Branded Superstars without explanation. But that put Ringo in a sticky predicament considering that he might lose HIS spot in the company. Things got underway with the pair locking up and Boulder taking early control of the contest. A spinebuster slam had a headache in FoX before Boulder locked him in a sleeper hold and drove him into the canvas with a sleeper hold sitdown slam. The fans were on their feet when there was a total black-out inside the BRAND Big Top and nothing could be seen. A burst of flames in the centre of the ring and the lights came back on with Ringo stop, dropping and rolling. Technicians burst into the ring with fire blankets and the fans were on the edge of their seat asking one question… where WAS Shawn FoX?

Winner: Double count-out due to fire
Rating: Too hard. Maybe on a rematch… if we ever find FoX.

Backstage, we saw Sandra Dee traipse about the halls, looking to get that next big scoop on the current goings-on of our roster when she happened to stumble into BRAND Wrestling’s newest hire “The Wyoming Wild Man” Tom Elijah. Leaning back haphazardly against the wall, also scaring our fair loyal interviewer with his unkempt neanderthal-like apperance, Tom began to run down his opponent, Howard Idol. He stated he knew full well about the reputation of Howard Idol and knew that he’s raising hell in other feds we won’t mention here (take THAT, competition!). Elijah also mentioned while he may be the guy rocking a haircut straight out of 10,000 BC, Howard Idol’s very existence set the natural order of evolution back a million years. He vowed that he wasn’t here to dazzle fans, cut pretty catchphrases fans can sing along with or put on a wrestling clinic that’ll appear on youtube tomorrow, his sole intent was to tear Idol’s muscles from his bones and make him experience true pain. When Sandra Dee asked how he’d been preparing for his match, Elijah quickly disposed of an empty bottle of whiskey and appeared to slightly stagger down the hall, ready for a fight.

Back inside the ring, “Pepper” Pete Peppins prepared the BRAND Name Championship belt presentation but was not addressed by Sharc at all. Instead, Sandra Dee came out with a cue card advising Sharc sent her. His message was that he would only accept the belt AFTER he had destroyed Joe Bananas. So he could wipe Bananas’ blood on the belt in celebration. Sandra Dee advised that she was told to emphasise the part where it was “non-negotiable”.

“the Wyoming Wild Man” Tom Elijah v. Howard Idol
Next inside the ring was the Wyoming Wild Man, Tom Elijah, and Howard Idol. Things got underway before the bell even had a chance to sound with the pair squaring off for some punch head tennis. Elijah eventually being able to overrule the punch up. Whipped Idol into the ropes and drove a massive big boot into the face of the Rajah of Ratings. A Fireman’s carry into a turnbuckle drop had Idol staggering around but he managed to reverse a powerbomb attempt and took some advantage by clotheslining Elijah to the outside. Idol had the fans on their feet with a springboard high cross body over the top rope to a standing Elijah outside. Tossing Elijah into ringsteps, guard rails and anything he could get near, Idol took the advantage. Attempting a lift to drop Elijah face first onto the ringsteps it was reversed and Idol headbutted the ringpost against his own will. Elijah tossed him in the ring again and took immediate control with a short-arm clothesline followed by a monstrous headbutt. After the headbutt Elijah dropped to hands a knees and looked as though he might be sick, losing his composure for a moment. He dry wretched inside the ring giving Idol the chance to stalk him, attempting the GTFO but Elijah caught Idol’s foot and an airplane spin saw Idol SMASH into the ringpost. Dizzy, dazed and a tag confused, Elijah pulled Idol to his feet and WHAM-O! WILD BOMB! 1-2-3 and Elijah sicked up a little on Idol with the cover, getting groans from the fans as he wiped his mouth the referee refused to raised his wrist in victory.

Winner: “the Wyoming Wild Man” Tom Elijah
Rating: **

Mary-Lynn Mayweather emerged as Elijah left for backstage, seeing Idol with sick on him shouting at the referee that BRAND was an abomination. Mary-Lynn had a remote control in her hand and a laser pointer. Behind her dropped a white sheet and a powerpoint presentation was displayed onto the sheet. She was giving the fans a history lesson on the decline of Idol’s intelligence over the years and mentioned Idol was proving Darwin’s theory was right, but in reverse. She ended with a plea for everyone to think of the children. The NOW stupid children.

Bananas and Sharc were up next and the BRAND Name Champion was attempting to put his foot down and make a statement on Bananas. Yet Bananas managed to the upperhand early on with a flying headscissors, grounding the champion. He wrapped up for a release German suplex but Sharc managed to roll with it and ended up on his feet, flattening Bananas with a monstrous clothesline. Stomping away on Banana’s neck before sitting him up and kicking him hard in the side of it. The fans groaned and booed Sharc who seemed to be loving every minute of it. Reverse DDT and the champ had the upperhand, not looking to relenquish his position. Sharc lifted the challenger into the Tree of Woe before a HUGE running knee strike put flat on his back in the canvas again, and things did not look good for Bananas. Sharc made several belt gestures to the fans who were giving him PLENTY of heat. Sharc hoisted Bananas to the top rope and began the ten punch crowds can NEVER shy away from counting along with. Only on 9 Bananas found some gusto and bounded up onto Sharc’s shoulders and HURRICANRANAED HIS ASS TO THE OUTSIDE! EVERYBODY got out of their seat as both men rolled around the outside in agony. Sharc found a steel chair and attempted a swing but somebody caught the chair. PEPPER! The fans roared loudly as Pepper snatched the chair from Sharc’s hands shouting “I’m not Vinny Mac! Not in my ring, bucko!” Sharc wound up to strike the owner of BRAND when Bananas bulldogged him to the hard floor. They rolled around punching one another until Sharc found himself in the affirmative position. Took back inside where Sharc compiled his lead again with a big swinging neckbreaker and a kickout. Using his control Sharc grew cocky when Bananas turned things on their head with another reversal, this time a DDT which he turned into a spinebuster modification of some sort. Sharc shouldered up on the pin attempt and Bananans hit a standing senton. Banans went high up and staked Sharc as he tried to get to his feet and FLEW for his diving enzuiguri only for Sharc to catch him by the leg for a Dragon screw that nearly pulled Bananas’ leg out of it’s socket. Blood in the Water and pinfall and Sharc snuck away with it.

Winner: Sharc
Rating: **1/2 (SO nearly a ***)

After the match, Sharc wasn’t done and was looking to bash Bananas and started stomping away. All Sharc was interested in doing was getting the blood of Bananas to wipe on his belt. Pepper got inside the ring and tried to stop Sharc only to be shoved over so Sharc could continue the assault. The fans roared as Pepper got to his feet and as Sharc turned around he felt the brunt of his OWN CHAMPIONSHIP TITLE! Peppins clobbered Sharc with the BRAND Name title belt and left the champion sprawled on his back. Pepper dropped Sharc’s belt on his chest and helped Bananas up onto his feet. He took a microphone and introduced the BRAND Name Champion but he wasn’t awake to hear it. Peppins reminded the fans that he was there to put on one Hell of a show but when push came to shove, you don’t mess with Pepper coz he’s nobody to be sneezed at!

Number One Contenders Match
Scoot Johnson v. Mary-Lynn Mayweather v. Wone
The excitement didn’t end there. The triple threat match for the Number One contender spot got under-way with Johnson, Mayweather and Wone. Wone and Johnson tied up, with Johnson attempting to make his way across to Mayweather but Wone stepped into the fray and tied up. Headlock takedown and Mayweather used what smarts she had to avoid confrontation as best she could. Wone took control of Johnson with a whip to the ropes and dropkick which put Johnson flat on his back. Mayweather chimed in with a legdrop to the back of Johnson’s head. Both competitors seemed interested in removing Johnson from the fray. Wone and Mayweather double teamed Johnson with a double DDT before Wone whipped Johnson into the ropes, lifted him up with a flapjack and Mayweather did some sort of handstand dropkick upwards into the head of Johnson. Wone leant in the corner while Mayweather pinned Johnson, eliminating him from competition. Johnson rolled out cursing Americans and shaking his head in disgust as his armoured dwarf escorted him to the back. The fans roared as Mayweather and Wone tied up in the centre of the ring, with Wone taking advantage early. Powerbomb here, DDT there, here a suplex, there a neckbreaker, everywhere an achey Mary-Lynn. Wone the wrestler had control! E-I-E-I-OOOOOOOO! Sorry. But Wone took control and made the cover, only Mary-Lynn kicked out on two. Wone went up top and stalked Mary-Lynn as she got to her feet and a flying forearm drove her into the canvas. He covered and Mayweather managed to kick out with a bee’s dick worth of time left! Wone punched the canvas frustrated with the slow count. Pulled Mary-Lynn to her feet and attempted a Fall from Grace but Mary-Lynn wriggled enough for Wone to drop her. Scrambling on hands and knees she got to her feet and shot back a shuffle sidekick as Wone charged. He went down like a sack of shit and Mary-Lynn took control with a somersault senton. Darting up the turnbuckle with a moonsault and then a snappy legdrop across the face before hooking the leg. Yet Wone managed to kick out of the contest for Mary-Lynn to this time curse the referee, trying to become the number one contender. Howard Idol emerged from the back, distracting Mary-Lynn as he bashed a pot with a wooden spoon near the backstage entrance. She cursed him a few moments before turning and walking straight into the Fall from Grace and it was goodnight, Irene. Wone getting the 1-2-3 and coming out as the number one contender to the title.

Winner: Wone (number one contender to the BRAND Name championship)
Rating: ***

The war between Howard Idol and Mayweather seems to fuelled as we go from week-to-week. There seems to already be no love lost between them as Idol manages to get the upperhand again this week, costing Mayweather her number one contender spot without even laying a finger on her. I’m looking forward to this building more, hopefully we can see Mayweather get the one up on things next week because Idol is really getting under my skin, too.

Peppins surprised me! He told everyone he would be hands on and the big man with the wrinkles obviously isn’t afraid of the big, bad Sharc. Laying the champion out with his own belt? Priceless. Looking forward to seeing the aftermath of that because I’m sure Sharc won’t take that lying down.

Wone being the number one contender has his work cut-out for him to face Sharc at some stage (I’m tipping at the PPV which was named “Sharcbait” just yesterday). Be interesting to see how Wone slides into things with the violent Sharc but he’s got my support. I think he’ll do just fine after seeing what he’s capable of over the last couple of weeks. Be an interesting show.

Elijah’s stomach movements concerned me and Idol reported he had a bitter smell on his breath. Medical tests will show if Elijah had some sort of bug or what was wrong with the superstar and BRAND apologises for fans having to see Elijah sick inside the ring.

Tonight’s show was fantastic and I enjoyed it thoroughly. Things seem to be working up in BRAND and it gives you more reason to tune into Branded Superstars to find out out all the latest from our very own stars including some highlights from Homebrand TV.

Until next time, I’m Morton Murphy, and I’ll catch YOU on the Flipside!

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