Thursday EW TorchCenter: DWF, PCW, Just Wrestling

Tonight on EW TorchCenter:

Dream Wrestling Federation Insomnia Premiere
-T-Money vs. Chris Bladez
[[T-Money lifts up Blades and pumphandle slams him into the middle of the ring. The crowd begins to cheer out of nowhere. Money looks around at the crowd flipping them off once more for jumping on his bandwagon? T-Money falls on the mat across the Chris Bladez as the referee begins to count.

1........2..........3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Capps: T-Money has won this match!

T-Money stands to his feet, still not paying any attention to the crowd cheers. He hates the fact they are actually cheering him until he turns to leave. He realizes exactly what is going on. He turns to face Doozer!

Sin: DOOOZER!!!

Doozer throws T-Money outside of the ring to a roar of cheers. The two men outside the ring exchange blows. They begin fighting right best the announcers table as Doozer kicks Money in the gut and he bends in pain. Doozer suplexes Money through the announcers table! Doozer gets back to his feet and looks down at T-Money with a look of hatred in his eyes. Doozer turns and walks away with his hands held high into the air. All the fans are on they`re feet cheering, "Doozer!, Doozer!"]]

Political Championship Wrestling Extreme Political TV
-PCW TV Champion ‘King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke vs. Bob Nye- The Foot Fetish Guy
[[Suave: “Von Munchke goes for a drop toehold and sends Nye to the canvas.   Von Munchke slides out to the floor…he pulls Nye out by the legs.  Right hands by Von Munchke who’s been in complete control from the opening bell of this match.”  Nye catapults himself at Von Munchke but bounces off and lands onto Von Munchke’s knee.  Suave: “Von Munchke with a chair now… *CLANG*  Youch.  *CLANG*  That drops Nye down by where ring announcer Charlene Ann Beckworth sits.”  Nye stays on the ground for an extra few seconds to admire Charlene Ann’s feet from the floor.]]

Just Wrestling: What happens in Tijuana
-Violence Jack vs. Jacob McKail
Shanahan tossed McKail from the ring and led him up the ramp. There would be no count-out, and it was immediately clear that Shanahan hoped to use this clause to gain further advantage outside both the rules and the vision of the officials. The ensuing brawl took the pair to the stage and then off it, crashing to the concrete alongside the guardrail with a twin thump that shook both men and the venue itself. Recovering his senses the faster, Violence Jack sneered as he led McKail beneath the staging itself, and the arena erupted in excitement as only the crashes and bangs gave an audio commentary on what on earth was happening. McKail stumbled from beneath the stage with a crimson mask, and presently Shanahan followed clutching a piece of metal girding that looked as if it had been wrenched from the stage’s structure itself.

EW TorchCenter
Thursday August 13th, 2009
Written by Johnny Suave

Good evening and welcome to another edition of EW TorchCenter as we round up the last couple days of E-Wrestling activity. 

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DREAM WRESTLING TUESDAY NIGHT INSOMNIA

Tuesday evening debuted the 2nd DWF wrestling program- Tuesday Night Insomnia.  We’ll start with the always combustile Mike Polowy who wrestled in the Main Event against Cody Brews.  However, before the match, Polowy had some words for the ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl,’ and former EW TorchCenter’s Tessa Martin.”

(courtesy of Dream Wrestling Federation)
[[Last night, as I know everyone is aware, I had a confrontation with Tessa Martin at Slaughter which almost turned physical. She had been quite critical of the way I do things around here, and I took a situation that existed in my personal life and I let it get the best of me in the ring. So I'd like to apologize for almost snapping last night, and becoming physical with Ms. Martin."]]

Say what?  Is this the Mike Polowy we all know and love to hate?  Say it isn’t so!

[["You see," he continues, the volume of his voice beginning to rise. "I apologize, because I held back. I wholeheartedly apologize to Tessa Martin for NOT destroying her personal personal pan pizza box with the stiffest hot and ready goddamn soccer kick! she's ever felt in her life!"]]

Okay, that’s more like it.

[[...last night, I denied my responsibility. I stood in the ring with two of the most disrespectful, ungrateful women ever to lace up a pair of boots and call themselves wrestlers, and I had a chance to deliver a little bit of judgment. But instead, I let a few memories from my childhood get in the way, and I didn't do the job that needed to be done. But I assure you, Tessa and Dawn... and I assure you, fans of the DWF worldwide, that it will NEVER. Happen. Again.]]

He’s referring to Tessa and her manager, the 6 Foot Tall Demolition Machine in a short skirt Dawn McGill.  Now, down to business…

[[Polowy gets the advantage and piledrives Brews to the mat. He then walks over to the corner and smiles awaiting Brews to get back to his feet. This enrages Brews as he stares down Polowy and the two men begin to circle each other. Brews strikes first with a spinebuster! The boom can be heard throughout the Pine Bluff Convention Center. Polowy is getting to his feet, as Brews hits the ropes and hits a swinging neck breaker on Polowy. Brews is eating up the crowd at this point and heads for a turnbuckle to really get them pumped. He jumps off going for a flying headbutt and Polowy at the last minute moves out of way]]

Polowy seemed to adapt quite nice to the more extreme style of wrestling.

[[His back is to Brews as he comes up behind him. Polowy notices a wire that goes to one of the tv camera`s filming the event and reaches for it. As Brews comes at him he flips around and begins to choke Brews with the camera wire. Brews arms are flapping all around trying to escape. He is running out of air as Polowy just keeps applying pressure to with the wire around his neck. Finally he manages to wrap his arms around the head of Polowy and falls to the ground with a jawbreaker. Brews stands up and unwraps the wire from around his neck, and now can breath. Catching his breath he doesn`t even see Polowy come up and grab him. He suplexes Brews over the security barrier and the two men land just a few feet from the ring.]]

The young Brews put up a nice fight but in the end, it’s all about MPlow.

[[Polowy climbs on the table as well. Both of the men begin punching back and forth. Brews gets the upper hand and goes for a quick takedown on top of the table but is countered with the MIKE EFFECT! This sends Brews through the table. The bell rings, and Polowy stands up looking down at Brews amongst all the broken wood from the table. The referee bring Polowy his belts and he just stares at Brews.]]

Mike Polowy, getting back on track on Dream Wrestling’s Insomnia show.  However, the addition of Tessa Martin and Dawn McGill to the DWF roster seems to have agitated MPlow and tensions escalated when Martin and McGill showed up and sat in the front seat along with former DWF Champion and current Missouri Valley Wrestling Champion Miss USA.  Stay tuned on this one.

Other results from Insomnia:

-B.R. Ellis wins his debut match in DWF over Marty Menace
-T.J. Parker scores an upset win over Pierce
-T-Money def. Chris Bladez and then gets put through a table by Doozer post match
-USXF and Mexican Express both qualified for a three team tag team title match next week against Mike Polowy and Jak Nemesis

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 Missouri Valley Wrestling Association

‘Lingerie Girl’ Brandi Bayless vs. Weathergirl Hallie

VIP Brin and Sky vs. Star Trekkies Sierra Jacobson and Missy Halverson

TV Title Final:
Carrianne McDermott
vs.
“Manchester Masterpiece” Brooke Evans

Plus, Miss USA speaks for the first time as MVW Champion

Next Sunday night at 9 PM

————–

Live from the Donald L. Tucker Center in Tallahassee, Fl
August 17, 2009

Chris Bladez vs Pierce

T.J. Parker vs James Devine

Tina Davis vs. Tessa Martin vs. Lora KirK vs Lady America
Over the top rope or elimination match
for a Womens Championship title shot

Malcolm Dred-King vs Casey Pierro-Zabotel

Travis Williams vs Michael Byrd

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PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV

Not a lot of wrestling on last night’s PCW Extreme Political TV.  But plenty of Bill Clinton.

[[Bill Clinton appears to a standing ovation.  Clinton: “Thank you…thank you.  I am profoundly appreciative of your applause.  I understand that there are some differences of opinion over what division PCW is going to keep.  Let me say this, big things are expected of us, and nothing big ever came of being small.  We cannot build our own future without helping others to build theirs.  So, if we can have both Kathryn Randall Collins and Miss USA come out here now, I want to try and mediate this crisis and find common ground.”]] 

Clinton tried to mediate the ongoing conflict that’s raged within PCW ever since Miss USA arrived AND was inflamed even more when she won the Missouri Valley Wrestling Title Sunday night.

[[KRC: “I just want to know what the hell she was thinking?”  Miss USA: “What do you mean ‘what the hell I was thinking.’  I was contacted by MVW about a possible situation.  I went.  This was the result.  This doesn’t change a thing.”  KRC: “It’s changes everything.  It gives PCW a justifiable excuse to cut out the women’s division with you cavorting with the Missouri Valley title.”  Miss USA: “Cavorting with the Missouri Valley title?”  Clinton bites his bottom lip.  Clinton: “Kathryn, I feel your pain…”]]

Clinton invites both Miss USA and KRC back to his suite for…further discussion.  Later on, Hillary Clinton is giving a press conference…

[[Hillary: “Does anyone have any questions for me?”  A student asks a question and it’s translated for Hillary.   She’s apparently asked to comment on her husband’s position about the growing influence of the American Heartland Coalition on PCW.  Hillary: “”Wait, you want to know what my husband thinks? My husband is not part of the Obama team- I AM!  You ask my opinion, I will tell you my opinion. I’m not going to channel my husband, because GOD knows what I’d find…”

BILL CLINTON’S SUITE
Clinton, Miss USA, and KRC relax in a hot tub.  Clinton sits back and smiles as Miss USA and KRC energetically argue back and forth about the merits of holding the MVW title…while in a hot tub.  Clinton sighs.  Clinton: “It’s great to be me.”]]

So.  Was Clinton successful?  Was peace and unity returned to PCW?

[[Bill Clinton comes back out.  His hair is all mussed up.  He has scratches all over his face and arms.  And his one eye is swollen shut.  Clinton: “Well, I did my best.  I tried to bring Miss USA and KRC together to put aside their differences and come together for the common good.  Unfortunately…”  Miss USA’s voice: “FOR THE LAST TIME BOB!  STAY…AWAY…FROM MY FEET!”  Miss USA briskly walks by wearing just a towel.  Clinton: “That’s right.  Somehow, that Bob Nye the foot fetish guy got in the hot tub too.”  Nye follows Miss USA wearing a snorkel and breathing apparatus.  Clinton shakes his head.  Clinton: “And we were making such progress…]]

Hell, no.  Actual matches that did take place last night:

-MATCH #1 FOR THE PCW TELEVISION TITLE
‘King of Old School Gimmicks’ Baron Von Munchke (c) w/Dr. Bill (Independent) def. Bob Nye- Foot Fetish Guy (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)

-Big Oil dumps Kirk Walstreit as partner and goes it alone.

-MATCH #2 Big Oil w/ Texas Tex (American Patriots) def. Jobber the Hut (Island of Misfit Wrestlers)

-MATCH #3 EXTREME WEATHER NETWORK-Steve Abrams and Mike Gettis w/Jim Franscantore and the Extreme Weather Girls Jen, Steph, and Kristina vs. JACK SCHETT and BULL SCHETT w/ Horst Schett and Hans Gruber-the Extreme German Schnauzer
-no match again. This time, the Schetts pin the Extreme Weathergirls

———————–

Live from the American Airlines Arena in Miami, Fl
August 18th, 2009

Insomnia Line Up

“Loose” William Avery vs Owen Manton

T-Money vs Cody Brews

B.R. Ellis vs Cancer Jiles

Jak Nemesis/Mike Polowy vs. USXF vs. Mexican Express
Ultimate Jeopardy Tag Team Championship Match

Doozer vs Level-One
Non Title

DREAM WRESTLING FEDERATION

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PRO WRESTLING LARIAT

Angel Scott and Angel Casey aka the tag team Angels of Death from the Missouri Valley Wrestling Association, each lounge in a chair along with VIP’s Brin and Lingerie Girl Brandi Bayless.  All four ladies are wearing white robes.

Scott: “Did you guys watch Pro Wrestling Lariat the other night?”

Bayless: “I did.  It was exciting…”

A series of dives from the Firebirds and Suicidal Youth

Casey: “I’ve just got three words for you- Rod the Bod…”

…the three-hundred and twenty-five pound Rod ‘the Bod’ Fantastico shows why he calls himself the World’s Largest Luchador when he launched himself off of the top ropes with a flipping tope onto both of his opponents and his partner…

Brin: “Oooooh.  I like that Wyatt Bronson…”

Bronson continued kicking the crap out of Rich for quite a few minutes, with the champion never getting in any offense except for the occasional eye-rake or toe-stomp that only infuriated Wyatt that much more…

Scott: “I don’t know.  I’m partial to Dusty Griffith myself…”

Dusty Griffith paced the floor of his locker room. His tournament final with Frank Dylan James for the Pride of Texas Heavyweight Title was coming up in a few short minutes and he seemed to be mentally preparing himself for what he knew would be a war. He said nothing, never even acknowledged the camera, he just paced. The look of determination etched across his face was a familiar sight, though, and you could tell that he was running his game plan one last time before the big match.

Casey: “Oh yeah?  Well, that Rich Mahogany is hot…”

Rich Mahogany climbed out of a hot tub wearing only an electric-blue banana-hammock

Casey: “…that is, hot as in sticky, sweaty, smelly,and needing a shower.”

Scott: “A cold one I bet.”

Trailer Park Barbi walks in wearing her signature tube top and mini-skirt complete with a pair of stilettos and a cigarette hanging out of her mouth.  She’s carrying some sort of painting.

Barbi: “Hey guys.  Look what I got!”

She shows the ladies the painting.  It’s a velvet painting of Rich Mahogany signed by Mahogany himself.

ALL: “EWWWWWWW!”

Bayless: “Well, if you want to watch some real men…

Dusty got enough separation and rolled back into the ring. Frank shook the cobwebs loose and followed suit, and as soon as both men made it to their feet they were slugging it out again.

Brin: “And some real action…”

Frank grabbed Dusty’s neck and choked him back into the corner. The referee counted but to no avail as Dusty grabbed Frank by the neck too and the two grapplers tried to strangle each other.

Casey: “There’s only one federation to watch…Pro-Wrestling LARIAT!

Dusty and Frank has rolled their way to the outside of the ring again and continued their fight as officials were tossed by the wayside any time one of them got in the way. The fight went over the guardrail and into the crowd and Skaaland and his officials couldn’t gain control of the situation.

Bayless:“Yee-haaaaa”

Brin: “Ride em cowboy!”

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JUST WRESTLING: WHAT HAPPENS IN TIJUANA

The results from last night’s Just Wrestling event in Tijuana, Mexico:

Thomas Knight def. Skylar Montgomery

Terrence Kingsley def. Adrian Taylor

Cheap Labor def. Aaron Nothings

MAIN EVENT
Jacob McKail def. Violence Jack

Next week, Just Wrestling moves on to Santa Barbara, CA.  The card includes:

Three Way Match
Skylar Montgomery vs Adrian Taylor vs Wrett Warren

Thomas Knight vs Aaron Nothings

Cheap Labor vs Terrence Kingsley

MAIN EVENT
Three Way Flaming Cage Match, Just Wrestling Championship
Violence Jack (c) vs Andy Murray vs Jacob McKail

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CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING ORGANIZATION: DRIVEN 75

Still waiting on the results on Driven 75.  As of August 11th, it looked like the results would be coming out in the next couple of days. 

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GENESIS PRO: GENESIS 19 RESULTS

-Bill Liden def. ‘Ace High’ Cameron Sky
-Future def. Dylan Forster
-Kintaru def. Seth Iser
-Desy Extreme and Dr. Baby- double countout
-Eli ‘The Future’ Samuel def. Tyson Holloway
-Xavier Byson def. Gothic King
-’Tiger’ Jafari def. ‘The Legend Killer’ Yung-Holie
-Jim Rooster def. Magnum Magnificant
-James “BigTrouble” Kendrix def. Jessica Pagan
-Wynter def. Vincent Kane

A scary moment in the Ryan James- “The Natural” Seth Tyler (c) rematch.

(courtesy of Genesis Pro)
[[James looks into the crowd and screams "Hell's Gambit!"]

Joe Gardner – Ryan James will put this away with his running moonsault!

[James hops over Tyler and runs toward the nearest corner. He leaps up to the second rope then the top rope in a flash, and jumps for the moonsault...but the rope breaks! Ryan James comes crashing to the mat on his head!]

Joe Gardner – Oh my god! This is unfortunate. The top rope broke under Ryan James’ feet, and he might be seriously injured! We need to get help out here for Ryan James, now!

Eddy Roth – He’s not moving. His legs are shaking, but other than that, he’s not moving. This is scary.

[The referee checks on Ryan James to see if he's okay. Meanwhile, Sean Tyler comes to, rolls over, reaches out, and drapes his fingertips over Ryan's chest. The referee pauses before making the count.]

ONE….TWO….THREE!]]

James is down for several minutes before being put in a gurney.  Good news though…

[[Ryan shouts something, and they stop, placing him down. The paramedics undo the straps and help Ryan to his feet as the crowd roars. Ryan gives a wave and a nod to Sean Tyler, still standing in the ring, as the fallen challenger walks off.]]

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Wednesday Wrestling Rag Completely Deranged

The WWR announced late that it is holding a supershow involving wrestlers from the Dream Wrestling Federation, Missouri Valley Wrestling Association, Political Championship Wrestling and others on Sunday August 23rd.  The show will be held at Anderson Arena on the campus of Bowling Green State University in Bowling Green, Ohio.

According to A. Kuluha Bacardi from the WWR, the show’s intent is to showcase the best talent from the many different federations out there.  “What we hope to accomplish,” Bacardi said in an interview, “is to serve as the catalyst for more of these events to take place with other federations who may see an event like this as a perfect vehicle to show off their talent.”

The tentative card looks like this:

-PCW Tag Team Title Match: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Starz N. Stripes (c) vs. Jack Schett and Bull Schett with Horst Schett and the Extreme German Schnauzer Hans Gruber

-DWF Young Guns Plus One Elimination match: T-Money vs. Cody Brews vs. Travis Williams vs. Doozer

-MVW Tag Team Title Match: Angels of Death-Angel Scott and Angel Casey (c) vs. The Vatican Vice Squad- Sister Mary Marlboro and Sister Sandy Scarboro with Mother Superior Sister Susan

-PCW Title Match: O’Beck Bahama (c) w/Justin Sufferable vs. Khalid-El w/the Axis of Evil vs. Hollywood A-Lister Stone Chism w/the Skanky Rich Bimbos vs. The Right Reverend Randy Richardson w/the God Squad

DWF Non-title match:  Level-One (c) vs. Owen Manton vs. Pierce vs. Jak Nemesis

More matches to be named later.

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DIAMOND ELITE WRESTLING

Wednesday, August 12th, 2009
Rockville Sportsplex – Washington, D.C.

Triple Threat Welcome to DEW Match
Astaroth vs. Krimzon Blaze vs. Edward Diamond

Singles Competition
Steele vs. Vincent Sinclair

Singles Competition
Haze vs. JT Brown

Singles Competition
Gwynplaine vs. Cyrus

Singles Competition
Randy Rotten [Accompanied by Ricky Riot] vs. Riley O’Connor [Accompanied by Eli Williams]

Main Event Tag Team Match
Robb McBride & Tommy Hart Jones vs. Michael Fox & Bryan Payne

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8/13-HIGH OCTANE WRESTLING TURMOIL @ The Best Arena

• Jason Wild v Trip Eisen
• The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

• Marcus Reinhardt v Chris Kostoff
• The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

• Mark “The Explosive” O’Neal v Ethan Cavanaugh
• The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

• Max Kael v Kirsta Lewis
• The referee for this match is Matt Boettcher, and the rules are Standard Match.

• Shane Reynolds© v Aceldama v Issac Slade©
• The referee for this match is Joel Hortega, and the rules are Standard Match.

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SIMCOE COUNTY WRESTLING NEWS

(courtesy of Simcoe County Wrestling)
THE TEAM OF PAUL CAIN AND RIFLEWILLY IS NO MORE!!! Paul Cain has let it be known the last two weeks that if Riflewilly keeps failing to garner victories, then he will become a liability. After their loss this week, Cain has eliminated any liability when this monstrous man, who we have been told is Damien Kahn, attacked Riflewilly, injuring him after the match.  Word has it that Cain has some really evil things planned in the future for SCCW.

TFWF SUPERSTAR GEORGIE NICKLES IN SCCW FOR A SHOW!!!  Georgie Nickles, top wrestler for TFWF, Roughkut 2009 Hall of Fame nominee, current semi-finalist in the Experts Extreme Tournament, perennial pain in Miss Lewis’s ass and now SCCW wrestler…for one night anyway. Georgie Nickles has signed a one off appearance to wrestle this week in SCCW (more on that below). What Miss Lewis will say about this is not yet known but you have to know she is not happy. These two have history going back a while in TFWF and now with Nickles teaming with the rival of “The Hellcat” in Scarlett Willis, that is just another way for Georgie to stick it to Kirsta.

PATRICK McCARTHY HAS STILL NOT SHOWN UP IN THE SCCW STUDIOS!!! McCarthy after his vicious match against Jay Jerzey for the BARBARIC title still has not shown up in the studios or the SCCW office. Rumor has it he might appear this week (August 17^th) at MNA, but right now that is an unsubstantiated rumor.

UPCOMING CARD:

Darrel l Leon vs. Blade

“Vamp” is new to SCCW and its rings with a hell of an opening match. Blade is a former champion in Roughkut Wrestling, still looking to make his mark in Simcoe County. This should be a match to watch.

BARBARIC Championship
Jay Jerzey (champion) vs. Rex Masters (challenger)

After winning the belt in what can only be called –the- most bloody and brutal in all of SCCW history, Jay Jerzey is going against doctor’s orders and defending against Rex Masters. After an alright showing in the BRAWL match itself, Rex is trying his hand at the BARBARIC division. Jay has been quoted as saying “the belt will not leave his possession until it is pried from his cold, dead fingers.” Rex has been quoted as saying “Hamma ton, innna soo mana da bel…. HAHAHAHA”. Not sure what it means, but I think it means the belt is his.

Scarlett Willis and TFWF’s Georgie Nickles vs. J. Brooks/Paul Cain

TFWF’s Georgie Nickles has been seen hanging around backstage for the last week. This week she has been contracted for one week, one match. SCCW’s sweetheart and TFWF superstar Vs Paul Cain and Justin Brooks. Why Brooks is teaming with Cain, we have no idea, but Cain has stated in private that Brooks’ world is about to be overturned, as is the rest of the SCCW.

Myke Adams and A. Steele vs. Sydney LaRoux and S. Hessingstock

SCCW Heavyweight champion and All Barrie champion facing off on opposite teams with the number one contenders to their belts across the ring as well…. Should have very interesting implications in regards to the winner.

MAIN EVENT (non-title) 

BROS vs. War Machine

This is the first match since War Machine has won the titles and it is against BROS (Dr. Ian & Greg Venom). BROS is known throughout the wrestling circles as a tough as nails team. Surely a win, even non-title Vs the champs will earn them a title shot.

 That is all there is this week for SCCW news. Stay tuned to  the website and to “A” Channel in Barrie, Ontario for all your SCCW needs. 

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WORLD’S TOUGHEST FEDERATION

Right now, it appears that there will be an Xtreme show on 8/23.  We’re keeping our fingers crossed.

————————

That’s going to do it for tonight.  Tomorrow night, it’s Mitch “The Deuce” Duesner with his High Octane Wrestling Report.  Hopefully, we’ll have something from the cWo and ACW plus the FWO should be posting their results anytime soon.  I’m Johnny Suave.  Have a good night everyone.