RIOT TWO WEEKS AGO
A music box overcomes the screen with a porcelain ballerina pirouetting on a saucer. The image is beautiful, it’s elegant…but beauty and elegance have no place in the IWC. The soft tranquil melody produced by the music box continues to play but the image of the graceful ballerina is replaced by footage that can never be described as ‘graceful.’
Mika: It’s time for a family reunion.
The video jumps to an incident that unfolded two weeks earlier on Riot when Taylor Chase attempted to lure her sister Mika Kozlov into an ambush. Unfortunately for Tay her plans go awry when Mika turns the tables and instead of being ambushed, decides to make a proposition. She corners Tay in the ring and forces her to hear a diabolical plot.
Mika: At Last Stand you and I face Katelyn Buehler for the World Championship….
A compilation of images bombard the screen showing Katelyn holding up the title and defending it in a number of high profile bouts.
Mika: But we don’t have to be opponents…
That same music box with the porcelain ballerina comes back into view while Mika’s voice is heard in the background.
Mika: If we team up we can guarantee that one of us leaves Last Stand as the World Champion.
Suddenly that polished and perfect ballerina changes. In a flash the figurine turns rusted and looks splattered with blood. The saucer it was pirouetting on becomes charred and decayed.
Cindy: WE want a reunion as well.
The footage from the ring has changed as well, and not for the best. Mika and Tay find themselves pounced on by the group known as New Eden. Cindy Todd, Serenity and Cassidy Haze ambush Tay and tie their former ally Mika Kozlov to the ropes. She powerlessly watches as Tay is assaulted.
Cindy: You will come back to me…Mika…..
Vows the demented Todd, who then drags away one of Mika’s most valued possession, her captive Andre Jordan. After being abducted two weeks earlier Dre finds himself taken again, this time by New Eden, who attempt to employ him as a bargaining chip to lure Mika back into their fold. Later on in the parking lot we witness New Eden attempting to vacate the parking garage with Andre only to have Mika interfere. She is overwhelmed by Cindy and forced to the ground while Serenity and Cassidy make an effort to escape with Dre still in their clutches. However, Taylor Chase of all people interferes, slamming a chair into Cindy’s spine, and then subjecting Cassidy to the exact same fate. Ultimately Mika and Tay find themselves stood face to face, estranged sisters towering over New Eden.
Taylor: Maybe a family reunion isn’t such a bad idea after-all.
The video cuts back to the ballerina as it turns and turns on the saucer and as it melts and melts into a puddle upon that saucer. Fire bursts through the music box, transforming the melodic tune it was producing into a grim and demented choir of chaos.
”Cut the Cord” by Shinedown plays in the background while a video package bombards the screen. An overhead shot, footage presumably provided by a drone, of a burning city skyline is the first in a string of violent imagery. Cut to IWC competitor Marina Valdivia walking down a street, navigating her way through burning and defaced vehicles. The scene switches over to a boiler-room where one can see the massive gloved fist of Miss Jon swinging across her wide abdomen and slapping into her palm. The visual that follows is of legend Orlando Cruze in the ring superkicking Tabitha Silverstone.
Another quick clip takes viewers to a playground in the dead of night. Mika Kozlov is seated on a warped, rusted and ashen carousel. It twists in a chillingly slow fashion with Mika’s legs dangling over the side. The video cuts to another location, the wrestling ring where Teiji Shintaro is mutilating the face of his victim Tyson Galloway by twisting a fork in his flesh. The following scene features Katelyn Buehler walking away from a building before the structure explodes into a ball of flame right behind her back. Back to the interior of the arena where we see Andre Jordan hitting a crossbody on Orlando Cruze that drives both men down through tables.
A graveyard is brought into view where numerous tombstones have been marked with graffiti. One such tombstone has Serenity seated on top it with a can of spray-paint shaking in her hand. The footage switches to Matthew Bowden coming off a corner with a corkscrew splash. The video then transitions into Taylor Chase standing on top of a ruined vehicle that has presumably been demolished by the crowbar that is flung back over her shoulder. Her focus isn’t on the car that’s been decimated, instead it’s on the freshly painted fingernails she’s blowing on.
Mya Denton is the next athlete featured as she delivers the shining wizard on a defenseless therapist trapped in the center of the ring. That image is short lived, replaced now by a clip of Karen, Melanie and Blaire McBride stood shoulder to shoulder around the flames that are rising from an old oil drum. The shot cuts to the squared circle where Cassidy Haze is smacking her own sister Emily in the face with a 2×4 wrapped in barbwire. The final image is from a police station that has been left in total ruin. All of the holding cells are open and there is no sight of the officers who would normally be hard at working filling those cages. Instead what we see is Kat Kelly seated in one of the cells with her hands and ankles bound by shackles, her mouth covered by a Hannibal Lecter style face mask. Seated just beyond Kat’s cage is her tag team partner Lexy Chapel, who is wearing a policeman’s cap that is turned sideways while she tears up the pages of a report, throwing the shreds into the air.
A fiery IWC emblem is the final image on the screen before the show goes LIVE.
CASSIDY HAZE VS. TAYLOR CHASE VS. SERENITY
Riot doesn’t start with a whimper, it starts with a bang….A bang so loud it would give Diamond Dallas Page a raging boner and a need for a fresh pair of underwear.
The lyrics of Boss’s Daughter are playing through the loud speakers, meaning one thing and one thing only, it’s time for Tay-Tay. Through the curtains that dangle over the entry way strides former three time World Champion Taylor Chase. The First Lady of Wrestling gets a ‘unique’ response from the crowd. The reaction inspires Tay to kiss her fingers and then slap them on her backside, inferring that the fans can pucker up before putting a wet one on her ass. She then springs for the ring, and surprisingly makes this jaunt without her battalion of Monarchy followers.
Greyson: Riot is back on the airwaves….
Frankie: And what a start to the night. Tay the bae is on her way!
Sparkles: Aren’t you a regular Dr. Seuss?
Frankie: I rap just as often as I flap to the Tay.
Greyson: The less details you give us about your fixation on Taylor, the better.
Sparkles: Taylor Chase headed for the ring to compete in a preview of her upcoming triple threat match at our next pay-per-view, Last Stand.
Greyson: At the pay-per-view its Tay taking on her sister Mika Kozlov and the World Champion Katelyn Buehler for the richest prize in our industry, but tonight she’s got a pretty steep challenge as well.
Sparkles: It’s Tay-Tay facing two members of New Eden in a triple threat bout, and to make this fight a little tougher she doesn’t have her group Monarchy at her side. By decree of our Principle Owner Karen McBride, Monarchy are BARRED from ringside.
Frankie: That is such a bullshit decision. It just goes to show how biased Karen is against Monarchy. Wasn’t it bad enough that Karen fined and threatened them with suspension two weeks ago?
There is no Monarchy but Tay didn’t need their assistance in her previous title wins, so she’s more than capable of getting it done on her own. She flies as solo as Kwai Chang Caine, but the same cannot be said for her opponents. The lyrics of ‘My World’ results in goosebumps and the graying of hair, because this music filtering through the PA system means that New Eden are headed for the squared circle. Cassidy Haze crawls along to the stage while her associate Serenity waltzes on out and stands over her partner’s back. The two point at the ring where Tay is all by her lonesome.
Sparkles: Well Karen McBride might not be as ‘biased’ as you think, Frankie, because Cindy Todd, the Queen of New Eden has been barred from the corner of her team.
Frankie: Did you notice what you just said, Sparkles?
Sparkles: Sparkles tends not to think about anything that comes out of my mouth.
Frankie: You said ‘TEAM.’ Tay is taking on a TEAM. This is nothing but a glorified handicap match and ya know it.
Greyson: Well Tay brought this on herself. Two weeks ago she attacked New Eden in the parking garage and drew their ire.
Frankie: But it was because she was protecting her sister, Mika.
Greyson: Who New Eden have been trying to bring back into their fold.
Sparkles: New Eden are going to be out for blood in this triple threat preview.
Frankie: This isn’t a preview in New Eden’s mind, this is a damned execution.
Things are getting as tense as a Mexican standoff now that Tay finds herself locked in the sights of Cassidy and Serenity. A smirking Serenity waves a pinkie finger as a greeting to her opponent.
Serenity: We’ll take it easy on you, frenemy.
Suuuuureee they will.
The bell rings and Serenity and Cassidy are instantly on top of Tay. It’s going to take a superhuman effort on the part of the former World Champion to fend off the blows coming at her from both sides. Tay is being overcome by the onslaught as she’s driven back into the corner, where fists and boots slam against her body. Finally New Eden take hold of either of her wrists and send Tay flying across the ring into the far corner. Just before she hits the turnbuckle Tay reaches out and latches onto the top rope, kicking her body up into the air in the process. Cassidy was charging after her but now ends up running under her. The shoulder she had intended to drive into Tay instead collides with the corner. Tay lands on her feet, turns away from Cass and turns towards another opponent charging towards her. Serenity gets a mouthful of bicep, Tay hitting a lariat that drives her down to the canvas. Tay has to keep her head on a swivel, turning to face Cassidy and now taking her down via the spinning heel kick.
Frankie: Go Tay-Tay GO!
Greyson: Surprisingly Tay is managing to hold her own out here in spite of the fact that she’s got two of the most dangerous athletes in the IWC out for her blood.
Sparkles: Why? Blood has far too much iron. Now if it was cheese, Sparkles would understand.
A surprised Serenity will not be thwarted in her efforts to take Tay down and to keep her down. She’s already popping up to her feet and running right into her opponent’s back elbow. Tay drills her adversary in the teeth and then backs her up into the ropes before launching her across the ring. Serenity is hurdled towards Cassidy, who leaves her feet in order to leap frog over her own partner. After leaping over one person she leaps towards another, Cass barreling in her opponent’s direction. Speed is once again employed by Tay to side step her adversary, catch her by the back of the head and toss her along through the cables.
Greyson: This is what Tay has to do. She has to try and keep this one on one.
Sparkles: Now it’s just Serenity and Tay in the ring together.
Frankie: That’s my girl, she’s just as cunning as she is curvy.
Cassidy is out of the ring but she’s not out of the equation.
After dispatching one opponent from the ring Tay sets her sights on another. Serenity is back upright and is having a tense stare-down with Tay, the two going mono-a-mono. Just before these two can really lock up, Cassidy intervenes in the potential encounter. From ringside she reaches under the ropes and into the squared circle, wrapping hands around Tay’s ankles then pulling them out from under her. She keeps pulling until Tay is out of the ring and her legs are draped over Cassidy’s shoulders. The crowd lets loose with a wail when Tay is sent hurdling into the ring apron with an Alabama Slam!
Greyson: NO CASSIDY NO!
Sparkles: You don’t tell General Aldo no, and you don’t tell Cassidy no EITHER.
The slam against the apron has left Tay’s back in the most God awful condition imaginable. And guess what? It’s about to get exponentially worse. Cass pulls her target up to the apron and then into a suplex right across it. Once again Tay’s back withstands a harsh impact with the harshest part of the squared circle. After these multiple collisions with the apron Tay is not in any condition to fend off being pinned. She’s thrown into the ring where Serenity is waiting on her and waiting to drop into a lateral press across her chest.
The pin is averted when Tay throws her arm out from under just one of her opponents. Serenity remains adamant in her pursuit of dispensing pain. She pulls Tay up from the ring and sends her flying into the ropes that Cassidy is standing on the opposite side of. Cass’s knee collides with Tay’s lower back and the impact sends the former World Champion staggering back to the center of the ring where she’s heaved into a Canadian back-breaker. A malicious Serenity drives Tay’s spine right across her knee before dropping her to the ring where she can be pinned.
Once again Tay gets her arm off the ring and keeps this bout going.
Serenity: Don’t make me hurt you!
As if she hasn’t already?
A banged up Tay is pulled up from the ring and then hit with a knee so forceful across the ribs that it totally knocks the air out of her lungs. Cassidy joins in on the fun, stepping in to her opponent’s side and hitting her with a double axehandle across the lower back.
Sparkles: Sparkles is wondering if Tay is going to get the same treatment that Emily Cage did two weeks ago.
Greyson: If Cassidy had no trouble decimating her own sister, then you had better believe that she’s got no qualms decimating Tay-Tay.
Sparkles: Especially after Tay ambushed her with that chair on the last Riot.
A certain amount of glee is exhibited by Cassidy as she heaves Tay up into another Canadian back breaker. She keeps her opponent spread across her knee while shouting towards Serenity. A nearby corner is quickly climbed, Serenity reaching the top rope before coming off with a knee that smacks Tay right under the jaw and sends her back flipping off Cass’s knee.
Frankie: See what I mean? See what I was saying? This is a handicap match dammit.
Greyson: It’s somewhat fitting isn’t it? Tay and her sister Mika have designs of turning their triple threat World Title match at Last Stand into a handicap bout by teaming up on the champ….
Frankie: Don’t go trying to imply that Tay is getting her comeuppance. She doesn’t deserve this, not one bit. What are you going to say next, that Jodie Foster got what she deserved in the Accused just because she was a woman in a bar full of men?
Greyson: I would never….
Frankie: Or that the sailors at Pearl Harbor deserved to go down with their ships just because they were on a boat?
Greyson: There’s no comparison.
Frankie: Or that the kids at the Neverland Ranch deserved to be…..
Greyson: DON’T EVEN!
The punishment is too much for one person to bare, even when that person is a multiple time champion named Taylor Chase. She’s now dragged to her feet by Cass and Serenity, who continue to turn this triple threat encounter into a handicap match. They simultaneously Irish Whip their common foe into the ropes but just before Tay can hit them she leaps the top rope and ends up on the apron. With as much speed as she can muster Tay lunges from the apron, keeps a grip on the cable and twists her body around so that her shins come down onto the shoulders of her adversary. Before Serenity can react she’s being hit with a head scissors that sends her flying through the ropes to the outside of the ring.
Tay no sooner gets back to her feet before she’s pounced upon by Cassidy. It takes just one of her forearm strikes, delivered on point to the small of Tay’s back in order to shut her down. Cass then takes Tay around the waist and pushes her along chest first into the ropes. She attempts to parlay that bounce from the ropes in order to pull Tay down into a victory roll from behind. Tay is indeed rolled up but she doesn’t stop rolling once she ends up on her shoulders. She ends up reversing the roll up into one of her own, sitting on top of Cassidy’s thighs and folding her up beneath her into the pin.
Greyson: Counter into the roll up.
To everyone’s surprise, Cassidy especially, she is not able to get her shoulder up in time before the referee makes the three count.
Sparkles: What? Wait? Hold on, Tay got her!
Greyson: What a stunner!
Frankie: Tay caught Cassidy with her pants down. Why do I suddenly have an erection?
The reaction is understandably mixed when Tay, a universally reviled competitor, manages to pick up a win over an equally as despised opponent. Cassidy is irate as she kicks out of the pin just a second too late. Tay isn’t irate, she’s positively pumped, celebrating her win in true Tay fashion. That celebration is a short lived one, because Cass is back on her feet and her boot is colliding straight against her adversary’s kidneys.
Sparkles: A mafia kick right in Tay’s spine.
Greyson: A nasty shot from a nasty woman.
Frankie: The nastiest. I’ve seen classier women performing donkey shows in Mexico.
We’re about to find out just how nasty Cassidy and Serenity can be as the two continue to vent their frustrations through physical violence. They have Tay totally at their mercy, subjecting her to a barrage of stomps now that they have her pinned to the canvas. It doesn’t take very long before reinforcements are on hand to assist their fallen comrade. The crowd erupts at the visual of Tay’s allies hustling down the ramp.
Greyson: This assault has just drawn out Monarchy.
Sparkles: Was wondering when we’d see these two groups cross paths.
Frankie: It was inevitable we’d see them go at it. Just as inevitable as my condoms exploding because they can’t build one that can match my manhood.
Orlando Cruze, Tay’s husband, leads the Monarchy charge, the first to slide into the ring and the first to find his fist hurdling into one of his lover’s attackers. Serenity and Orlando trade blows that eventually cause the two to go toppling from the ring. Another member of New Eden falls from the squared circle as well, but she won’t be knocked from it. Instead Cassidy Haze goes rushing the length of the ring and diving over the ropes, crashing straight into two more Monarchy representatives at ringside. Alistair Taylor and Kat Kelly find a body crashing into them and taking them both to the ground. But where one member of Monarchy falls, two more rise up to take their place. Ryan Watson, Lexy Chapel, Lucas Knight and Trinity Street are all over Cassidy. The brawl takes them from the ringside area straight into the crowd. Serenity and Orlando get swept up into a melee as well, their brawl taking them over the barricade and into the stands.
Greyson: Monarchy and New Eden BRAWLING away from the ring.
Frankie: Monarchy’s superior numbers overwhelming Serenity and Haze. I love this more than eating out of a hooker’s naval.
Sparkles: Sparkles would do that, if said naval were serving cheese.
The crowd manages to clear out of the way of this donnybrook. Eventually their eyes go from the explosive situation in the stands to the chilling scene unfolding within the ring. Tay is recovering from an assault at New Eden’s hands, though she won’t be given much time to mend. The leader of New Eden has just slithered into the ring behind Tay and within seconds Cindy Todd is laying out the former World Champion with a clothesline to the back of the neck.
Greyson: Just when you think things couldn’t get any worse.
Sparkles: They just did. Cindy Todd is here.
Frankie: And she’s living my fantasy by putting her hands all over Tay-Tay.
Cindy’s blows land one after another across the already banged up Tay, keeping her down to the canvas and this time there is no one to lend aid. Clearly Cindy attacked at the most apropos time, enjoying her assault on Tay uninterrupted. Though unleashing physical violence on Tay isn’t Cindy’s only motivation.
Cindy: Family reunions?
Espouses Cindy once a microphone ends up in her hands.
Cindy: That’s what you and Mika are planning, right? (Stomps at Tay’s temple) A reunion? Strange ain’t it? It looks like we have something in common. (Another stomp to the temple) I yearn for a reunion with your sister as well. And if she doesn’t want to watch me peel the flesh off your body, then she’ll join me…
There isn’t a long wait between Cindy’s demands and Mika’s response to them. ‘I Started a Joke’ begins to play over the PA system and Mika Kozlov comes waltzing on out to her theme music. Stood behind her as always is a gargantuan shadow that takes the form of Borislav. Before Mika takes one step closer to the ring she turns back to her protective mass of muscle, puts a palm to his oh so hairy chest and gives him a nudge. Per Mika’s demands Borislav returns to the back and leaves Mika to make a solitary march towards the ring.
Sparkles: This situation just keeps getting stranger with each second that passes.
Frankie: You want to see strange, look directly at Tori Spelling’s face.
Greyson: Cindy Todd picking up where New Eden left off, assaulting Tay, and now she’s requesting that Mika come out and join forces with her.
Sparkles: Looks like Mika is doing just that.
Greyson: Odd considering that for the past several weeks Mika has been determined to earn her way back into Tay’s good graces.
Cindy has got exactly what she wanted, but it remains to be seen if she’s gotten more than what she bargained for. Mika is standing in the ring with Todd and has assumed the demeanor of a bashful child. Her hands are interlocked, her heels are twisting on the canvas and her eyes are batting lovingly in the direction of a woman who has deigned herself Mika’s Queen.
Mika: (Pouting) Did Mika make mommy mad?
Cindy: Mad? I can never be mad at you. At those who try to take you away from me? That’s a different story. (Another stomp to Tay) First it was Aiken Frost, dragging himself up out of the grave and stealing you away from my side, and now-NOW it’s this pathetic girl (crouches down and pulls Tay up to her seat by her hair). Look at her….Look at how weak, how frail, how brittle she is. And yet you want to be with her? You choose HER, (yanks back hard on Tay’s hair)…THIS!?! Over me?
The sullen (looking) Mika dips her chin to her chest.
Mika: I’m sorry….
The remorse expressed by Mika has a STRANGE effect on Cindy. She lets the worm off the hook, releasing Tay from her wrath in order to ensnare Mika with her warmth. In a truly rare display Cindy shows affection, sweeping and extending her arms out to her sides.
Cindy: I think I can find it in my heart to forgive you…
Greyson: Cindy has a heart?
Frankie: You bet she does. She’s got a big one…I don’t know who she got it from, but I saw the jar she keeps it in.
Cindy: Embrace me and we can move on from this.
It looks like Mika is thinking….which can be INCREDIBLY dangerous. She looks at Cindy, open arms and all, then down at Tay, languishing on the canvas, then back at Cindy, who continues to DEMAND a hug. The choice seems to be a simple one.
Greyson: What’s it going to be Mika? You return to New Eden or you return to your sister’s side?
Sparkles: Cindy is pretty much giving her the false illusion of choice.
A decision has been made, Mika walks towards the welcoming arms of her Queen.
Greyson: Ooooh great, Mika is going back to Cindy…
Sparkles: As if New Eden weren’t strong enough already.
Frankie: She’s picking Cindy over Tay? Don’t worry Tay-Tay, Frankie will never leave your side.
Mika all but steps over the body of her sister in order to embrace the very woman who just assaulted her.
Cindy: You’ve made the right choice….
Yes she has, and Mika cements her choice by spewing a fireball from between her lips straight into Cindy’s face.
Greyson: OH GOD!
Frankie: What the hell was that!?!
The very same question is going through Cindy’s mind while her hands are clasping at the potentially burnt flesh on her face. She’s collapsed to the ring with both palms shielding her charred skin, writhing in anguish. A smiling Mika stands above her, swiping the back of her hand across the lips that just produced a great ball of fire.
Greyson: Mika….MAN I can’t believe this. Mika just shot a fireball into Cindy’s face.
Sparkles: How did Mika manage to do that?
Frankie: And why did she do it?
Clearly Mika has no appreciation for her actions, or maybe she has TOO MUCH appreciation for them. She skips around a thrashing Cindy until she reaches her sister. Though Tay is suffering fatigue and injury, she is still cognizant of what her sister just did. It puzzles Tay, but not as much as what Mika does next. She crouches down towards Tay and pats her on the top of her head.
Greyson: Mika’s choice has been made.
Sparkles: Sparkles hopes she’s ready to deal with the consequences.
The camera looks down the hall that ends at a set of double doors. After a moment or two one of those doors start to open just as Tabitha Silverstone stomps into the arena. Her shoulders are squared, her fists are clinched, and her expression mirrors that of Mr. Hughes. It seems Tabitha is in full-fledged ‘enforcer’ mode, and it’s her client she’s protecting. Andre Jordan comes walking through the door that his agent holds open for him.
Andre: I’m not going to curtsey no matter how much of a gentleman you’re being.
Dre muses over the fact that it was Tabitha who got the door for him.
Andre: I don’t need you to hold doors open for me (Dre swings the door that Tabitha had hold of shut) and I don’t need you to protect me (puts his hands on Tabitha’s shoulders). I mean, I appreciate you being there for me but I’m NOT helpless.
Tabitha: Dre (taking his hands from her shoulders and cupping them in her own palms), I’m not taking any risks. Now that you’re free from Mika and we’re back together, I’m not going to chance losing you again.
Andre: Don’t worry….
Tabitha: You know that’s impossible. It’s my job to worry about you. And you know what else my job is? Keeping you safe at any cost. Why else do you think I went out there two weeks ago and fought Orlando Cruze when I thought he was behind your abduction? And why else do you think I plan on having some words with Mika tonight for kidnapping you?
Andre: No-no-no-no…(swiping his hands through the air)…NO. Promise me PLEASE, that you’ll stay away from Mika and let ME deal with her.
Andre: NO (puts palms up in front of Tabitha’s face). End of story. (Tone is far less authoritative) Listen Tabs, I’m sorry I ever questioned you….
Tabitha: Oh that’s all water under the bridge….
Andre: Let me finish. I feel like an absolute jackass for thinking so low of you. You’ve only ever been looking out for my best interest….
Tabitha: And Marina’s.
Andre: Yep, Marina too. You’ve been there for the both of us not just as an agent, but as a friend as well…No, you know what, after two years we’ve become more than that.
Tabitha: That’s right, we’re family.
Andre: Which is why I hope you can forgive me for ever doubting you or your methods.
Tabitha: I’ve already forgiven you.
Andre: That’s….that’s so great to hear. MAN (smiling wide) what a relief.
Dre takes his hands out of Tabitha’s and steps back from his agent, the two wearing matching smiles.
Andre: I got so much I want to say to you, Tabitha, but…..you know what, let’s hold off on that for just now. I got some business to go and handle. You just stay back here and relax…
Tabitha: Dre, I’m not gonna let you….
Andre: Shhh-shhh-shhh….I got this.
Dre walks away from his agent, headed in the general vicinity of the ring. He leaves Tabitha behind, but she damn sure won’t stay where he just left her.
Tabitha: You go and handle your business Dre, (smirking) and I’ll handle mine.
We jump from one tumultuous situation straight to another. Selena Frost SHOULD be holding her Queen of Wrestling Championship, but she isn’t. Selena Frost SHOULD be sitting in the comfort of the locker-room but she isn’t, instead she’s plopped on a chair in the center of the parking garage. Selena Frost should be enjoying the company of her wife, Deanna Springs, but at the moment Deanna is out of harm’s way. And there WILL be harm, and Selena’s gonna be the one who inflicts it. Her eyes are trained on the entrance to the parking lot, and they are not about to budge.
Sparkles: Yikes. This looks tense.
Greyson: I don’t think we’ve ever seen the Snow Queen look any tenser.
Frankie: She’s mean mugging the shit out of that entrance to the parking garage.
Greyson: That’s because she’s waiting on the arrival of Desmond Drake, who two weeks earlier stole her Queen of Wrestling Championship.
Frankie: How many times must you be corrected? You’re just like a diabetic who won’t stop eating chocolate cake, you don’t get ‘it.’ Desmond reclaimed…let me emphasis this….RECLAAAAAIIMED the Queen of Wrestling Title from a woman who never deserved it to begin with.
Greyson: Well neither I nor the Principle Owner are on your wavelength, because Karen McBride has ordered Drake to come here tonight with the Queen of Wresting Title.
Frankie: Drake doesn’t answer to McBride.
Sparkles: No, by the looks of it, tonight he’s going to answer to Selena Frost.
Sweat streams down the body of an exhausted Taylor Chase, who finds herself propped up by a big old crate set up in the hall where she’s crouched. At either side of her are Ryan Watson and Trinity Street, her Monarchy compatriots looking on with concern and expressing it.
Ryan: Ya’ okay mate? Ya took a real nasty arse-kickin’ out there.
Taylor: HEY! I gave just as good as I got.
Trinity: How are you’re ribs holding up?
Taylor: I’m good…No. I’m GOLDEN. In fact, you know what, if you were to put Cindy Todd in front of me right now I’d do a lot worse than throw fire in her fuck ugly face.
Injuries, those inflicted on Taylor and those she wants to inflict, are the very last thing she focuses on right now. Mika Kozlov is the only thing she’s concerned with, especially as she moves in closer and closer. Down the hall Mika is carried, worn on the back of her bodyguard Borislav like she were a book-bag.
Mika: Whoa boy….WHOOOAA….
Kozlov pulls on Borislav’s hair like they were reigns. Eventually he stops and Mika dismounts.
Mika: Miss me?
She asks once face to face with her sister. Instinctively Watson and Trinity are trying to put themselves between Mika and Tay.
Taylor: At ease.
Tay forces her way through her friends so that she and Mika can get up into each other’s grills.
Taylor: If you came here expecting me to thank you for helping me, then you best step off. Because I’m not thankful, in fact, I’m pissed. Pissed that you totally took away my opportunity to beat the skank out of Cindy.
Mika: Oh but sestra, I’m not here expecting gratitude, I’m here to be your fairy God mother and make all your wildest fantasies come true.
Taylor: You’re gonna give Karen McBride ass cancer?
Mika: Nooooo, but I am going to give you the chance to help me make Cindy Todd’s face look like an ass.
Taylor: What are you saying?
Mika: Did you by chance notice that some silly goose didn’t bother to take down the steel cage that’s been hanging above the ring since Selena fought Alistair inside of it all those weeks ago?
Taylor: If it’s not my reflection then no, I didn’t notice it or anything else.
Mika: Well I was just thinking that instead of letting that cage continue to just sit there and collect dust that we put it to good use.
Taylor: What did you have in mind?
Mika: Well I kind of had a kooky idea. Crazy, I know.
Taylor: Goooo oooon.
Mika: How about, you and me team up just like we will do at Last Stand against the World Champion, only tonight we team up against New Eden and take them out inside of the Steel Cage.
It strikes Watson and Trinity as absolutely STUNNING that Tay is actually debating this, and it’s not something she debates for very long.
Taylor: You know what? A family reunion suddenly doesn’t sound like such a bad idea.
Cameras are cutting back to the ring just in time to catch the tail end of Andre Jordan’s entrance to it. He is in the process of jumping over the barricade after making a jaunt through the crowd, his music cutting out in the back while he rolls into the ring. A microphone is in his palm, but that won’t be the last thing he gets his hands on…hopefully.
Greyson: Well guys we’re being joined by Andre Jordan.
Frankie: Whoa-whoa-whoa, time out, hold the phone, turn your head and cough, did I just hear this right or did something crazy crawl into my ear? Are Tay and Mika actually going to team up tonight?
Sparkles: Not only are they teaming up, but their gonna do it IN A CAGE, and their opponents are gonna be New Eden. Friggin NEW EDEN!
Greyson: That’s going to be a wild….and I mean absolutely WILD match. Right now though let’s hear from Andre Jordan, who had a WILD couple of weeks himself.
Dre paces the ring with mic lifted to his lips and finger scratching at his temple, eyes downcast to the canvas.
Andre: It’s not often that I walk out of the Manhattan Center with my head hung low. But that changed two weeks ago, because I was….well…..I was downright embarrassed. After being dehumanized by Mika Kozlov, and then abducted by New Eden, I was…I was….I was….humiliated.
Frankie: What!?! He has all these smokin’ hot chicks fighting over him and he’s humiliated?
Greyson: Those smoking hot chicks are psychopaths who ABDUCTED him, Frankie.
Frankie: But crazy chicks can be so much fun in the sack.
Sparkles: Yeah, though the only sack that Andre was going to be in was a body-bag if New Eden or Mika had their way.
Andre: Last year didn’t end on a good note for me, and from the looks of things, it’s only getting worse now that we’re in 2016. But that’s a trend I’m not about to let continue, I ain’t about to let this dumpster fire keep burning. Some things have got to change, and before the end of the night they will. That leaves me with a problem though, and that problem is deciding where to start making that change. Do I go after Mika Kozlov, do I remind her that my magic-stick is not hers to play with?
Andre: Ooooor do I go after New Eden? Do I give those girls what they want? A PIECE of Andre Jordan? Oh, and FYI, it won’t be the piece that Mika wants to get her hands on.
Andre: Then…..then there’s Orlando Cruze.
The crowd does NOT endorse this name-drop.
Andre: Orlando Cruze (still looking down at the canvas and shaking his head as he utters the name of his former friend), God damn son, I don’t even know what to say to you. You spit in my agent’s face two weeks ago, you challenge me when you knew I couldn’t accept your challenge, and yet you come out two weeks ago and you spread all this hot garbage about ME being a coward? You think I’m going to let that fly?
Greyson: I can definitely see Dre’s dilemma here. There are so many people who deserve a beating….
Frankie: Oh, I see what Dre’s problem is too. The fact that he actually thinks he has it in his power to give a beating to any of the people he mentioned.
Andre: So what am I to do guys? Who gets got first? Mika?
Andre leaves his choice up to popular consensus, holding up the mic to catch everyone’s reaction.
Andre: New Eden?
Again the mic is held up and the crowd cheers.
Andre: Orlando Cruze?
One more lift of the mic and one more loud reaction from the fans.
Orlando: These people don’t have a choice, and YOU don’t have a choice either!
A furious Orlando Cruze suddenly appears on the Cartel-tron. His face is blown up so big you can catch every single one of his snarled breaths and you can see the veins in his temples throbbing. Orlando is not just red hot, he’s nuclear mad.
Orlando: First you hide behind your agent Tabitha, then you hide behind your friend Marina, and now you’re trying to hide behind Mika Mother Effin’ Kozlov? Give me a break! Just accept it….just accept it, you didn’t accept my challenge two weeks ago, you didn’t come out to defend your agent when I was spitting in her face, not because Mika was treating you like her sex slave, it was because you’re A COWARD! You’re afraid to man up, grow a sack in those tighty whities of yours and FACE ME.
Frankie: Preach brother, preach.
Greyson: (Sarcastically) Orlando is such a class act.
Andre: I’m a coward? I’m a coward? I’M A COWARD!?! Why don’t you stay right there, Orlando, and I’ll show the world how wrong you are.
The microphone hasn’t even finished being flung to the canvas before Dre is rolling from the ring and stomping to the back. Orlando can still be seen on the Cartel-tron, smiling, crouching and gesturing for Dre to bring it.
Orlando: Yeaaah, oooh yeeeaah, come on Andre, I’m waiting for you coward. Bring your ass back here if you got the balls boy, and I’ll make you regret it. Don’t worry, I’ll be waiting right here.
Shouts Orlando before he turns, picks up a trashcan and throws it into the chain-link fencing that is set up as the backdrop for the interview zone.
Orlando: COME ON!!
Andre is already walking through the curtains and into the backstage area.
Greyson: Holy crap, this is gonna be intense.
Sparkles: Orlando challenging Andre to nut up….
Frankie: And from the looks of it Dre’s testicles just dropped.
Greyson: God, these two have been going at it for months now and it’s finally-FINALLY going to come to a heading here tonight.
Sparkles: When these two get their hands on…..
Cassidy: You made a very smart decision, Dre.
Just when the crowd didn’t think their hearts could beat any faster here comes New Eden, and their in FULL FORCE. In spite of suffering a burn to the face mere moments ago Cindy Todd is still stepping out right behind her fellow creatures. Her hands sit on the shoulders of Serenity and Cassidy, allowing the pair to guide her to the stage. She finds it difficult to see given the bandage that has been crudely taped over the side of her face and over one of her eyes.
Frankie: Theeeeeir baaaaaaack.
Sparkles: Would it be clever or insensitive if Sparkles said that New Eden’s ears must be BURNING after their names were mentioned by Andre?
Greyson: Not only would it be insensitive, it would be suicidal Sparkles. Moments ago Cindy Todd’s face was burned by Mika Kozlov, which effectively sent the message that Kozlov would not be rejoining New Eden.
Cassidy continues to speak up on New Eden’s behalf as she, a crouching with hands on her knees Serenity, and a mostly blinded Cindy occupy the stage.
Cassidy: You hear me, Dre? You did something smart for a change. You go and you fight Orlando, because you do NOT want a piece of us in the mood we’re in right now. After what just….
For the first time since Cindy’s debut in the IWC, she totally loses her cool. She grabs the mic out of Cassidy’s hands and screams out from beneath the bandages on her face.
Cindy: MIKA! TAYLOR! You want to be trapped in that cage with us (points to the Steel Cage hanging from the rafters)? You’re really that eager to turn your family reunion into a funeral? You have no idea what powers you’re trifling with ladies, but you’re about to find out. WE ACCEPT!
The microphone is thrown harder to the stage than the one Andre tossed to the canvas moments ago. New Eden walks to the back amidst shrill cries from the audience.
Greyson: Iiiiit’s on guys, New Eden versus the unlikely team of Taylor Chase and Mika Kozlov inside of the Steel Cage tonight.
Sparkles: Tay and Mika will be opponents when they challenge Katelyn Buehler for the World Championship at Last Stand, but here on Riot they’re going to be partners.
Frankie: Man, what a bloody ride we’re in store for later on.
Trainer: Are you SURE this doesn’t hurt?
It’s going to take two, maybe three full sized men to help the Trainer pick his jaw up off the floor. Never before has he seen such remarkable and speedy healing. Seated before him on a cot in his office is the very same woman he treated two weeks earlier, and in his arms is the very same arm that was swollen to twice it’s normal size and discolored with bruises. Much to his shock, there are is no swelling, there is no bruising, and there is a smile on the face of his patient World Champion Katelyn Buehler.
Trainer: (Twists the arm he has Katelyn extended out in front of herself) This doesn’t sting? Not even a little?
Katelyn: (Giddily) Nope.
Trainer: This is remarkable.
Katelyn: Guess I’m made of tougher stuff than you thought.
Trainer: I’ve never seen someone heal from this type of injury so quickly.
Katelyn: Wolverine ain’t got nothing on me. WHOOP! WHOOP!
Yup, Katelyn just raised the roof.
Douglas: You see Doc….
Dan Douglas stayed out of the camera’s frame for longer than he could bare. He steps to his client’s side and not only puts a hand upon her shoulder but extends one towards the Trainer as well.
Douglas: Healing isn’t a physical process, it’s a mental one.
Trainers: That’s poppycock.
Douglas: Not reall…..
Katelyn: WHOA! Hold up! Who in the hell uses the word ‘poppycock?’
Douglas: Listen, you might not be able to understand, but my client’s mind is strong, and all it took was her finding the will to want to heal.
Katelyn: Oh Danny, (puts an arm over Douglas’ shoulders and pulls him closer while playfully raising her fist to his chin) you kill me when you go all Sigmund Freud. Next thing you know he’ll be saying all my dreams are about a secret desire to have sex with my mother.
The Trainer bats his eyes about as awkwardly as he can.
Katelyn: And I just made things creepy didn’t I?
Douglas: As you can see Doc, my client is not only in good shape but in good spirits. So you’re job here is done.
Katelyn: Yeah, hit the bricks GRANDPA!
The Trainer has better things to do than sitting here listening to Katelyn talk about fornicating with her own mother. He walks off just as Katelyn slides down from the cot. The smile and the energy she exhibits fills Douglas with such pride, considering it was his brainwashing techniques that all but cured Katelyn of her maladies and prevented her from exacerbating them two weeks ago.
Katelyn: Well aren’t you just a smiling buffoon?
Douglas: I’m sorry, it’s just-it’s just so good to see you like this.
Douglas: In such a good mood.
Katelyn: Yeah, I just feel…I don’t know….it’s like I’ve got a natural high. Maybe their putting something in the coffee around here. Whatever it is, I’m just FLYING right now. Have been for like the past two weeks. Nothing is getting to me. Not even the thought of defending my title against Tay and Mika at Last Stand.
Douglas: I’m so glad to hear you say…..
Susie Moore lays into the horn on her hover-round and does it with so much force it could blow out ear-drums. Douglas and Katelyn have to jump back simultaneously as the backstage correspondent comes speeding into the trainer’s office and slamming on her brakes right in front of them. Her big gulp almost goes spilling out of her hand in the process of stopping.
Susie: AH-HA! I caught YOU!
Toy handcuffs that are obnoxiously pink find their way around Katelyn’s wrist, Susie making sure she can’t go anywhere.
Katelyn: (Playfully) Oh no, you got me.
Susie: And you ain’t getting away this time. Not until you spill the beans.
Katelyn: What’s on your mind, Susie?
Susie: Uhhh, my hair.
Katelyn: I mean what do you want?
Susie: OH! I got questions, questions you avoided two weeks ago. How dare you blow me off and leave me talking to Captain Picard instead.
Douglas groans as he slides his hands back over his bald scalp.
Katelyn: That’s weird, Dan didn’t tell me he talked to you….
Susie: Am I ever going to get to ask you my questions?
Katelyn: Okay-OKAY, go ahead….jeez.
Susie: First off, why did you choose to attack Lexy Chapel at the end of the last Riot?
Katelyn’s head snaps back, totally caught off guard by this question.
Katelyn: What? When did I….have you been eating Elmer’s glue again, Susie?
Susie: Nope. I’ve lost a taste for it. I’ve moved on to paint varnish.
Douglas: That explains so much.
Douglas has to intervene and intervene fast, stepping between his client and the interviewer.
Douglas: Clearly Susie isn’t all there.
Susie: What are you talking about? (Looks herself up and down) All of me is here, even my underwear….this time.
Douglas: She’s obviously mistaken.
Katelyn: About what? Me attacking Lexy? Because I’ve had people asking me about it on social media too and I’ve been like…da’ fuck you talking about? Been meaning to go back and re-watch the last Riot, but every time I do, I suddenly….I suddenly start feeling real sick to my stomach and have to run to the bathroom and then I….
Douglas: You don’t have to describe it any further.
Katelyn: Are you sure, there’s this part about undigested corn you would find utterly fascinating.
Susie: You know, I have access to the footage from the last Riot. I got it right here on my cell-phone. Want to watch it and see what everyone’s talking about?
Katelyn: Alright, but I don’t know what you THINK it’ll prove.
Susie starts to pull up some Youtube vids on her cellphone, navigating her way through the My Little Pony footage she had previously been watching.
Douglas: You can’t watch this, Katelyn.
Katelyn: You’re right, I don’t, but let’s indulge the naïve little thing.
Douglas: No, I mean, you literally CAN’T watch the footage.
Katelyn: What are you….
Her eyes start to veer towards the cellphone in Susie’s hand but suddenly stop before she ever sees the video that was just accessed. Her whole body goes paler….than normal.
Katelyn: Oh….OH GOD.
The World Champion goes racing out of the room with one hand over her mouth and another over her stomach. Susie lets go of the handcuffs she had around the World Champion’s wrist just in time to prevent being dragged off her hover-round. The sight of his client getting so ill has removed the smile that was once on Douglas’ face.
Susie: What was that all about?
Douglas: You wouldn’t….(pulls a golden talisman out of his jacket pocket and stares depressingly at it)….understand.
Andre: I won’t keep you waiting Orlando! Don’t worry!
You better believe that after everything Andre Jordan has been put through he’s in a fighting mood. Good thing for him that’s exactly what he’s walking into with fists clinched….a fight. He navigates his way through the various obstacles lining the walls of the hallway as he ebbs ever so much closer to a brawl with the man who challenged him just seconds ago, Orlando Cruze.
Sparkles: We didn’t have to wait very long for this, did we?
Greyson: No we did not. It’s gonna be a straight up fight between Andre Jordan and Orlando Cruze.
Frankie: A fight? Heck no it’s not, it’s gonna be a MUGGING. Andre doesn’t realize what he’s walking into.
What Andre is walking into at that exact moment is the interview zone, the very same place where Orlando Cruze was SUPPOSED to be waiting for him. But he’s noooooot. There’s no sign of Orlando anywhere, not standing in front of the steel mesh that provides a unique background for this section of corridor, or over the trashcan that he tossed into that very same set. Orlando is long gone.
Greyson: Where? Where’s Orlando?
Sparkles: Sparkles is clueless.
Frankie: He must have thought Andre chickened out like he has a history of doing.
Greyson: That is the biggest load I have ever heard. Moments ago Orlando promised Dre that he was going to be standing right there in the interview area waiting for a fight….
We find out just how huge said load is when a snarling Andre is turned into a slobbering Andre. He’s suddenly pounced on from behind by Orlando’s ally, fellow Monarchy member Alistair Taylor. He employs his forearm to smash Andre directly between the shoulder blades, the blow sending the unsuspecting superstar crashing down to all fours.
Sparkles: Hey, that’s Orlando’s running buddy Alistair Taylor!
Greyson: And he’s ambushing Andre! That son of a bitch…
Frankie: Easy now.
Greyson: This was a set up dammit….a friggin set up perpetuated by Orlando and Monarchy!
Frankie: There you go again MULDER, making up your crazy conspiracies.
Greyson: CONSPIRACIES!?! You’re seeing it happen right now in front of your friggin eyes!
Alistair doesn’t keep Dre grounded for very long, leading him up to his feet and then towards the steel mesh set. He had planned to send Dre’s head crashing into the chain-links but instead it’s his own face that grates against it. At the last second Andre reverses Alistair and sends him flinging into the steel. Alistair no sooner ricochets off the mesh before turning around right into a trashcan that Andre has picked up and Andre is introducing into his attacker’s skull. All of Alistair’s limbs go limp after this brutal blow to the head.
Greyson: Andre’s turning the tide! He’s turning the tide on Alistair!
Sparkles: He NAILED him upside the head with that trashcan.
Frankie: What the hell has gotten into this no good thug!?! Alistair was doing nothing but minding his own busine….
Greyson: Oh shut up FRANKIE!
Sparkles: This is insanity! And don’t tell me….don’t you dare tell me we’re going to commercial break?
Alistair goes staggering off camera while Andre charges after him, trashcan still in hand.
There’s the parking garage and there’s Selena Frost continuing to sit right in the center of it. She has a chair parked under her, trying to be as comfortable as she can be given the situation. Her eyes remain glued to the entrance, waiting on the arrival of Desmond Drake, and the arrival of her Queen of Wrestling Championship.
Greyson: As if things couldn’t be anymore chaotic here tonight, we’ve got the Queen of Wrestling Champion Selena Frost still stalking the parking garage in anticipation of Desmond Drake’s arrival.
Sparkles: Two weeks ago he ran off with her title belt, but Karen McBride has ordered him to come back here and return the championship.
Frankie: Stay defiant Dessie D, don’t you give the Snow Queen anything, and you can tell Karen McBitch that she can take her orders and stick then right up her tight….
Sparkles: Hey production crew, Sparkles knows this is a situation we want to stick with but you’re gonna want to get the camera on what’s happening out here STAT.
That’s exactly what the production crew does. They cut to the ring, a ring now occupied by a man who is so furious, so hot he might as well as be made of molting lava. Orlando Cruze does not come out to his entrance music or to any fanfare whatsoever. The camera gets to ringside just in time to catch him rolling into the squared circle and doing so with a microphone griped tight in his hand.
Orlando: Alright Andre, I’m out here just like we agreed.
Greyson: What? Wait…WHAT!?!
Sparkles: Ummmm….if Sparkles’ memory serves me correctly, Andre and Orlando were SUPPOSED to fight backstage, NOT in the ring.
Frankie: You must have been thinking about cheese or something and totally missed the part where Orlando said he’d come out and fight Andre….
Greyson: He never-ever said anything like that and you know it Frankie.
Frankie: Interrupt me one more time Lovejoy, one more time.
Greyson: I don’t know how Orlando manages to do it, but week after week after week he stoops lower and lower and lower. He knows damn well that Dre was going backstage to fight him…
Frankie: Stop Lovejoy, just stop, you’re making an idiot of yourself.
Once again Orlando has found a whole new level of despicable.
Orlando: I told you before the break to wait right here, Dre, to give me two minutes to make my way out so I could give you a smack right in your mouth. But biiiiig surprise, lo and behold you’re nowhere to be found. You tucked your tail between those things you call balls and you went off running. (Points his wagging finger at the fans) Do you guys see now what I’ve seen since day one? Andre Jordan is a cooooowaaard. Let me say it even slower….coooooow-wwwward.
Frankie: Orlando calls it like he sees it.
Greyson: Orlando is about as full of shit as you are, Frankie.
Frankie: Insult me one more time Lovejoy, one more time.
Sparkles: To be fair Frankie, Orlando DID challenge Andre to fight him BACKSTAGE.
Greyson: And when Andre got there he was ambushed by Orlando’s friend Alistair Taylor. It’s Orlando who’s the damned coward.
Orlando: I knew coming into tonight that Andre was yet again going to find another way to weasel out of a fight with me, and he didn’t disappoint, did he? Well I’m not about to stand around all night long waiting to hear Andre’s excuse for ducking out of another fight with me. Later on I’ll settle for fighting Marina, who apparently has a much bigger set of testicles than her friend does. And until then I’ll enjoy some time with my wife, you know, Taylor Chase, the HOTTEST woman on the planet. God is she soooooo friiiiggggiiiin HAWT!
For the next twenty minutes Orlando could go on and on about just how sexy his wife is and just how superior it makes him that he get a piece of that every night, but he isn’t given that opportunity. Lexy Chapel’s theme music is blasting through the loud speakers and the Evolution/Tag Team Champion is making her way through the curtains. Shockingly Lexy does not wear either of her title belts, in fact, the only thing over her shoulder is a kendo stick, the very same weapon that Katelyn Buehler used to assault her two weeks ago.
Frankie: This just got SPICEY!
Greyson: One has to wonder, even though I really don’t want to, what brings Lexy Chapel down that ramp right now.
Sparkles: According to the run-sheet, she’s set to take on Andre Jordan.
Frankie: HA! Fat chance of that happening. If Andre is too much of a coward to fight Orlando then you had better believe he won’t summon the courage to face THE Lexy Chapel.
Greyson: Do you get off on making yourself sound like a jackass?
Frankie: I get off on A LOT of things.
With the kendo stick still over her shoulder Lexy slips through the ropes from the apron. She approaches her fellow Monarchy cohort and reveals her own microphone.
Lexy: You’re not the only one who’s sick and fucking tired of cowards. You know, the type who run from a straight up fight only to show up later and attack you from behind? Two weeks ago that Casper bitch walking around with the World Title decided to ambush me after I had just retained my Evolution Championship, when I was at my weakest. Can you believe that shit? Well can you?
Orlando: It’s disgraceful.
Lexy: No, nuh-uh, it’s PATHETIC is what it is! And-and-and you want to know why? Why she attacked me like she did?
Orlando: Do tell.
Lexy: It’s because she knows that I’m going to win the Rumble in two weeks and she fears the thought of defending the title against me at Invictus. That’s why she blindsided me, that’s why she’s a two faced cum guzzling…..
Orlando: Lexy-Lexy-LEEEEEXXXY! Calm down mate, you’ll blow a vessel.
Orlando’s hand comes to a rest on Lexy’s shoulder.
Orlando: There’s no need to get so worked up, especially when it comes to facing Katelyn for the World Title, that won’t happen, not in a million years.
Lexy really hopes that Orlando isn’t downplaying her chances of winning the Rumble.
Orlando: Not because I don’t think you got it in you to win the Rumble. The reason you won’t face Kate at Invictus, is because Tay is going to take what is hers by birthright, she’s going to win the championship from Katelyn at Last Stand and then SHE’S the one who’s going to headline her third straight Invictus. And who will she be defending the belt against? It will be a member of Monarchy…(jabs a thumb against his chest)…THIS member of Monarchy.
Lexy’s jaw isn’t the only one that falls.
Orlando: For the first time in IWC history, it’s going to be husband versus wife for the World Title in the biggest Invictus main event of all times. It’s all going to happen after I enter and then win this year’s Rumble.
Lexy picks up her jaw.
Lexy: Fair enough, Orlando. I’ll let you go on believing that. And I hope….naaaah…who am I kidding…I KNOW that the finals of the Rumble are going to be the (bellowing voice) awesome Lexy Chapel versus the (softer tone) great Orlando Cruze. To make sure that happens, I’m going to prevent Andre from doing to you what Trailer Park Kate did to me two weeks ago. You know if he won’t face you straight up, then he plots on ambushing you. I’ll take him out before he ever gets the chance, and I’ll take him out this very second. I’m scheduled to face him later tonight, but I’m demanding to fight him right fucking now.
Orlando: Good luck getting him to man up and come out here.
After once again trying to humiliate Andre and dropping the bombshell that he’ll be in this year’s Rumble, Orlando Cruze vacates the squared circle. He rolls out and leaves Lexy behind to potentially deal with Andre Jordan, a man he clearly doesn’t want to tangle with.
Frankie: HUGE announcement by the mighty Orlando Cruze. He’s gonna be in the Rumble ya’ll!
Greyson: In two weeks the IWC will present Last Stand live on pay-per-view, and our annual Rumble will headline that event….
Frankie: And the Rumble definitely deserves to headline that pay-per-view when you’ve got greats the likes of Lexy Chapel and Orlando Cruze now involved. (Mumbles) And ummm, the Uprising brand’s roster too.
Sparkles: That match is in two weeks, but in a few moments it’s going to be Lexy and Andre going at it one on one.
Frankie: I wouldn’t count on it my fuzzy friend. Andre wouldn’t face Orlando, and he won’t face Lexy. The guy’s got less courage than brains.
Greyson: Something tells me that Andre might just prove you wrong.
LEXY CHAPEL VS. ANDRE JORDAN
We’re about to find out just how much courage Andre Jordan really possesses now that his opponent Lexy Chapel is in the ring waiting on his arrival. Per her demands to those production crew members stood ringside, the music for her opponent is cued up. Andre’s theme is playing over the speakers but at the moment he is nowhere to be seen.
Frankie: I told you! IIIIIII TOLD YA!
Greyson: Andre is presumably too preoccupied fighting with Alistair Taylor backstage to make it out here.
Frankie: Quit making excuses for him. Just accept it, Dre is a pussy!
Greyson: He’s the farthest thing from a coward.
Sparkles: He didn’t say Andre was a coward, he said he was a pussy. Which means that Dre is a female’s sexual organs. And now Sparkles is very confused.
Well there’s no confusing the blows that Dre lands straight across the face of Alistair Taylor. The two come staggering along through the curtains and to the stage where Dre’s fists land across Alistair’s forehead and keeps on connecting as they brawl straight down the ramp.
Greyson: There he is, there’s Andre!
Frankie: And the despicable bastard is STILL assaulting a helpless Alistair Taylor.
Andre lands such a forceful blow across Alistair’s face that it sends him flying back from the base of the ramp and into the ring apron. No sooner does Alistair hit the apron before Dre’s chop hits his chest. The blow threatens to tear the skin right off of Alistair’s sternum. But it’s his shoulder that receives the most damage when Alistair is Irish whipped along straight into the steel steps. His arm and his shoulder take the brunt of the impact and it leads to his body being left totally wiped out at ringside. After taking out one adversary Andre’s eyes twist towards another. Although Lexy Chapel did not like seeing what happened to her friend Alistair, she does like seeing the intensity in Andre’s eyes. She bends at the knees and stands in the middle of the ring with the kendo stick she carried out with her held back like a bat about to swing for the fences.
Frankie: Don’t you dare put a hand on her, Andre.
Greyson: Their opponents for Christ sakes.
With Alistair laid out there’s no force that is going to separate Andre from the woman he’s scheduled to face right here and right now. Andre leaps to the apron and stands in front of the ropes with Lexy waiting for him on the other side. It looks like the competition is just about to happen and Dre is going to dirty his hands with yet another member of Monarchy’s blood. However, right before this bout can go down and the action can get hot and heavy, Alistair interferes. He recovers in the nick of time to reach up from ringside, catch Andre by the hips and then powerbomb him straight into the ringside mats.
Sparkles: Alistair wasn’t taken out completely.
Frankie: With what little was left in his body he managed to throw Dre into the mats with the force of a meteor crashing into the earth. Now get him Lexy, get him GOOD!
Lexy quickly throws aside the kendo stick she was still holding, and then fills her hands with a top rope. She leaps over it to the apron, runs across said apron then dives off into a senton bomb that sends her back crashing right across Andre’s ribs. Lexy quickly pops up to her feet and does so with Dre’s head in her arms. She sends her opponent rolling into the ring before scaling to the apron then to the top rope. It looks as if she’s already going for the Raising the Standard.
Frankie: Oh YES, she’s gonna hit it right away guys.
Sparkles: It’s gonna end this fast?
It might just, but it’s not gonna be Lexy who wins in lightning fast fashion. Just as she’s about to clear from the top rope Andre goes bounding up the corner beneath her. He’s right about to deliver a top rope Angle Slam.
Greyson: Tide Turner off the top!
Sparkles: Sparkles was right, it is going to end this quickly.
Frankie: What? You want a cookie or something?
It’ll take more than a cookie to make Lexy feel better should Andre hit the very same move he’s beaten her with in the past. Lexy won’t fall victim to this move twice, hitting palm thrust after palm thrust straight across the bridge of her adversary’s nose. The shots eventually send Andre flying back off the turnbuckle and to the middle of the squared circle, landing not on his back but on his feet. Finally Lexy lunges from the top and hits the whisper in the wind, her back colliding with her adversary’s chest and sending both athletes to the ground. Lexy lands on top of Dre and then reaches back and hooks one of his legs.
Lexy ain’t stealing this one from Dre. Not only does he get his shoulder up, but he manages to wrap his arms around Lexy’s waist and bridge both himself and his adversary off the ring. Once back upright Andre twists the Evolution Champion around and into position for the backslide. He lifts her into the air though he doesn’t get her shoulders to the canvas. Instead of being pinned Lexy keeps her back to Dre’s and then reaches out with her legs, wrapping them around her opponent’s waist. She then pulls Andre over into a modified sunset flip pin.
Frankie: Did you see that counter? DID YOU SEE IT!?!
Greyson: I have eyes, Frankie.
Frankie: That was the Triple Lindy.
Greyson: It was a sunset flip.
Frankie: Who’s the wrestler, huh? ME. So if I say it was the Triple Lindy, it was the Triple Lindy.
Sparkles: Whatever you call it, it might just finish Andre off.
Nope, it didn’t. Dre kicks out and in the process rolls out of the sunset flip onto his feet and then latches onto Lexy’s legs. A despondent Lexy becomes a desperate Lexy as she fights being forced over into the step over crossface. Andre trying to pull her to stomach and apply the move but his adversary is squirming and squirming and squirming. Eventually she stops squirming and starts countering, dragging Dre down into the small package.
Frankie: It’s over! Someone pull the car around, grab some champagne, Lexy and I are going out to celebrate!
Said celebration will have to wait, cause you guessed it, Dre kicks out once more.
Greyson: What fast paced action in this contest thus far.
Sparkles: Well think about it. You’ve got a pissed off Lexy Chapel fighting a pissed off Andre Jordan. You knew this was going to get explosive.
Frankie: Much like my stomach after eating Taco Bell.
Dre has kicked out yet again and rolled out of the pin onto his feet. Lexy is waiting for him to stand, catching him around the neck, pulling him around so their back to back and then gyrating her hips in Rick Rude fashion. The Rude Awakening seems to be on the cusp of connecting, or it might have had Andre not reversed into the backslide.
Greyson: Dre went for that earlier and now he finally hits it.
Dre may have hit it, but ‘it’ won’t be enough to score him the win. It’s up to Lexy this time to kick out, rolling over backwards and onto her feet. Only one of those feet leave the canvas and go sailing straight for Dre’s face. Remarkably Dre manages to avoid Lexy’s superkick, dropping down out of the way and hitting a drop toe hold on his opponent’s planted foot. Lexy falls flat on her face with Dre standing up, latching onto her leg and dropping down into the step over crossface.
Greyson: Step-over Crossface…Lexy’s trapped in it and it doesn’t look like she’s got anywhere to go.
Frankie: Fight it Lexy, find the power from within to break out of this hold.
Sparkles: She’s trying to fight through.
Frankie: Frankie believes in you, Lexy! Everyone clap, if you show you believe too, then Lexy will get out of this hold.
Greyson: She’s not Tinkerbell, Frankie.
Lexy’s arms are flailing around with one constantly hovering over the canvas ready to slap it and submit to the punishment she’s being inflicted too. It would seem Andre is finally closing in on a big victory only to have that win ripped right out of his hands. Once again Alistair Taylor interferes in the match, this time reaching from ringside into the squared circle and grabbing hold of Dre’s ankle. With a huge tug he manages to pull Dre off the submission and do so undetected by the referee.
Frankie: Lexy with a Herculean effort to break free from the submission.
Greyson: Alistair pulled him off of the hold dammit.
Frankie: Would you stop? Would you JUST STOP trying to sell Lexy short?
If anything is going to stop, it’s Alistair’s interference. He keeps pulling on Andre’s leg until it’s under the ropes and over the apron. That’s where it stops because Dre rolls to his seat, puts his boots to Alistair’s chest and gives him one hell of a kick. The blow sends Alistair flying down and crashing against the floor. Andre then stands up just as Lexy comes hustling across the ring towards him. Dre catches her coming in though, bending down, catching her by the inner thighs and throwing her over his head. Lexy leapfrogs Dre and then goes flying straight into the ropes behind him, landing on the middle strand. She springs off, twists around in mid-air and goes for….well, we never find out, cause Dre catches Lexy and reverses into the Sky High Press Slam.
Greyson: Oh what a counter by Dre.
Sparkles: Right into the Thrill Ride.
Frankie: Lexy must still be concussed or something after she was hit with that kendo stick two weeks ago by Katelyn.
Greyson: You tell me to stop underselling Lexy, well you need to stop making constant excuses for her.
There will be no excuse in the world that can cover for Lexy’s demise at Andre’s hands.
The Thrill Ride ALMOST yielded dividends for Dre, but Lexy just gets her shoulder up in time to keep that from happening. Andre rolls away from her and straight into the corner, climbing quick to the top rope.
Greyson: We could be about to see the Big Air.
Sparkles: That patented frog splash elbow from the top.
The move delivers just what it advertises, big air. Dre gets a lot of height before ultimately coming down with the point of his elbow slamming straight against the CANVAS. Lexy rolled clear at the last second.
Dre winces in pain as he rises to his feet holding his arm draped across his stomach. He just starts to ascend to his feet when Lexy steps in and steps over his head, signaling now for the Explicit Content. The package piledriver is about to smoke Dre.
Frankie: Go on girl, hit that shit!
Greyson: If the Explicit Content connects we could very well see the end of this.
In a display of sheer resiliency Andre manages to pull free from the Explicit Content, swinging around out of her package piledriver and into a short arm clothesline. Lexy leaves her feet but not because she was knocked from them. She leaps into the air and catches the inbound Dre with a jumping downward spiral. Lexy hits paydirt, driving her adversary’s face square into the canvas. The disorientated Dre struggles to avail himself of his pain and his incoherence. Amazingly he manages to get up, right in time to have Lexy take him around the neck, twist him around slowly and then fall into a Rude Awakening style neck-breaker. A mere moment after hitting the move Lexy rolls back and into the lateral press.
It didn’t matter how many times Lexy gyrated her hips or with how much authority she ultimately delivered the neck breaker, it still wasn’t enough to best Andre. He manages to pop his shoulder off the canvas and then start the arduous journey to his feet. Lexy is right there to take him back down to the canvas by driving his face into the ring. She swoops in from behind, hooks his arms and goes for the Union Jack Attack. It’s not the Reverse Russian Leg Sweep that sends either Dre or Lexy down to the canvas though, it’s the drop toe hold. Andre reverses not only into that drop toe hold but into the step over crossface as well.
Greyson: Dre’s going for it again.
Frankie: Doesn’t he know any other moves?
One move might be all it takes for Dre to win this bout, IF and only IF he can get it locked in. Try as he may he just can’t apply the hold he’s setting up for because Lexy is flip flopping on her back and ultimately wedging her feet to his ribs. Dre is kicked off, sent flying back into the ropes and then ricocheting off of them. He comes stumbling right back into Lexy, who not only kips up to her feet but does so in time to put one of her boots into her adversary’s bread basket. Dre is hunched over and Lexy is now latching onto him with the Explicit Content on the verge of being delivered. Just when Dre’s fate seems sealed he shows that he does not prescribe to FATE. Dre stands up straight and sends Lexy flying over him with a back drop. But on the way down Lexy latches onto Andre’s hips and yanks him to the ring via the sunset flip. She rolls him over but Dre doesn’t stop rolling when his shoulders hit the canvas. Instead Dre rolls completely over to his feet and then grabs both of Lexy’s. The Evolution Champion is twisted to her stomach and her legs are then wrapped up as she finds herself subjected to the excruciating trauma of the step over crossface.
Greyson: He’s got it again! Dre has got that hold applied for a second time in this grueling match against Lexy Chapel!
Andre has the lock established about as tight as he possibly can, wearing the Evolution Champion down to the point of submission. She lifts her hand, looking ready to slap the ring and give over to the agony that consumes her fatigued body. With one last ditch effort she reaches out and claws at the ring, giving her mauled body a final tug towards the ropes. She latches onto the bottom cable and as thus the hold she’s locked in is broken.
Greyson: I really-really thought that Andre secured the win with that STF.
Frankie: Maybe he would have, had he applied it on a lesser opponent.
A huffing and puffing Lexy desperately needs a breather, dragging herself under the ropes and to ringside. It’s here that she intends to regroup, but Andre doesn’t provide her that opportunity. He rolls out of the ring and is keeping the heat on his opponent. Andre gets his hands around Lexy’s hair, pries her up from the mats and is about to throw her into the ring but he finds his efforts thwarted when she hits a step up enzugari to the back of his head. As Andre falls back his opponent rolls into the ring. A dazed Andre is about to follow his adversary before he hears heavy footsteps coming in from behind him. Before Dre can respond he feels the sickening sound of a kendo stick as it smacks across his spine. Not only has Alistair just interfered, AGAIN, but he did so using the weapon that Lexy brought out to the ring with her.
Greyson: Why is Alistair still out here? How come no one has gotten him out of here yet?
Frankie: Because he’s protecting Lexy and no one is going to stop him from doing it. I’d throw myself in front of a bullet for Lexy.
The referee is checking on Lexy in the middle of the ring, leaving him totally unaware of the outside interference happening beyond the ropes of the squared circle. Alistair swings the cane once again and this time the weapon flies right PAST Andre’s head. Said cane cracks the apron and now Andre’s fist cracks Alistair in the temple. The cane that was in Alistair’s hands goes rolling into the ring but Alistair won’t. Andre pulverizes Alistair’s face with punch after punch after punch, channeling all of his anger and all of his frustrations behind each brutal blow. Eventually Alistair loses his footing and goes down to the ramp with Andre coming down on top of him, still unleashing punches. Dre is so riled up, so impassioned and so inflamed with rage that he doesn’t even hear the sound of the referee counting over the sound of his fists crashing upside Alistair’s face.
Greyson: Get back in the ring Andre. You’re being counted out!
Sparkles: Sparkles doesn’t think he realizes that the referee is making that count.
The official is getting closer and closer to ‘ten’ but Andre isn’t getting anywhere near closer to returning to the squared circle. He’s still unleashing jabs across Alistair’s face before he remembers that Alistair isn’t his opponent. He whips around to glare at the squared circle where Lexy is kneeling and the referee is still counting. Andre comes hobbling along to the ring and slides in…slides in just a SECOND too late. The official is calling for the bell, having counted Andre out just a half a second before he could fully return to the squared circle.
Greyson: Ref, come on, Andre got back in the ring!
Sparkles: Not fast enough.
Frankie: Due to Alistair Taylor, Andre’s been counted out.
Andre doesn’t allow something like a count-out to stop him from inflicting some punishment. He goes after Lexy, who doesn’t back down. In fact, she’s antagonizing him, baiting him to come after her, and that’s exactly what Dre is doing. He walks right towards Lexy until his legs are caught on something, Alistair’s arms.
Greyson: Alistair AGAIN!?!
Like a bear-trap Alistair won’t let go of Dre’s ankles until he goes tumbling down onto his face. Lexy immediately joins in on the fun, stomping at Dre while Alistair still holds tight to his ankles.
Frankie: Time for Monarchy to prove once more who RULES this company.
Dre remains pinned to the ring and beneath the boots of both Alistair and Lexy. It isn’t until Lexy steps away that the beating stops…no…it doesn’t stop….it’s put on HOLD for just a second. Lexy is picking up the kendo stick and is pointing it at the beaten down Andre. Alistair acts quick, stepping in behind Andre, grabbing his arms and tying them up behind his back.
Greyson: This has gone on long enough.
Frankie: Oh but it’s just getting started.
Sparkles: To think, Alistair and Andre USED to be tight.
Frankie: Friendship stopped mattering to Alistair the moment Lexy started shaking that sexy ass in his direction. I’d shoot Santa Claus in his dick for just one wink from Lexy.
Sparkles: In the dick though?
What Andre is about to be hit with might be just as painful as what Frankie just described. His arms remain held behind him, leaving his midsection defenseless against the kendo stick that is on the verge of shattering them. Lexy lines up her blow like Dre’s ribs were billiard balls. She goes in to make the break only things go tragically awry for the Evolution Champion. Instead of cracking Dre’s ribs, it’s HER ribs that are cracked. Dre puts his boots up and kicks her straight in the mid-section, driving her back in the process. Not only does Dre fend off Lexy but he presses his luck by going after the man clinging to his arms. Dre slips out of Alistair’s clutches, steps behind him and then pops off with a HUGE Tide Turner. The Angle Slam sends Alistair’s body cascading to the canvas, with his back taking the full brunt of the impact.
Greyson: Alistair….Alistair hit with the Tide Turner!
Frankie: Why does Andre keep going after this innocent man? Doesn’t he remember how close he and Alistair used to be?
Sparkles: But didn’t you just say like ten seconds ago that friend….
Frankie: Shut it Sparky!
Alistair’s been wiped out and the same fate seems destined for Lexy. Already Andre is back on his feet and is bearing down upon her. She’s kneeling on the canvas and clasping hold of the kendo stick. Although she would just love to put that weapon to use, she’s never given the opportunity. A particularly muscle bound fan has just jumped the guardrail, raced to ringside and is reaching beneath the ropes to latch onto Lexy’s ankle. He drags Lexy from the squared circle and to his side, scanning her with his eyes to make sure she’s okay.
Greyson: It’s that fan again,
Sparkles: What fan?
Greyson: The very same one who two weeks ago helped Lexy after she was blindsided by Katelyn Buehler.
Frankie: They just let fans jump in the ring and grope Lexy? I work here and I’ve been trying to grope Lexy for months yet I’m not allowed to do it. I can only fantasize about it.
Andre is fantasizing about getting his hands on Lexy too, and not in the sexual sense. Instead he has to settle for getting his hands on something else, a microphone. He stands over the body of an unconscious Alistair while directing his words at the Evolution Champion as she and her ‘fan’ back up the ramp.
Andre: Do me a favor Lexy….
Lexy is already flipping Dre the bird.
Andre: You go back to whatever hole Monarchy are hiding in and you give your bud Orlando a message for me. You tell him that he can’t avoid a fight with me any longer. Because I’m entering the Last Stand Rumble, and I’m gunning for the PHENOM!
The microphone is thrown up the ramp and lands right at Lexy’s feet. It doesn’t stay at her toes, it ends up clutched in her fingers.
Lexy: Good, you want in the Rumble, more power to you. But Orlando isn’t the one you should be ‘gunning’ for, it’s the woman who’s going to win the whole shebang…..LEXY CHAPEL!
Now the microphone DOES stay on the ground.
Greyson: Another big addition to the Rumble to be contested in two weeks as part of our Last Stand pay-per-view.
Sparkles: Andre throwing his hat into the mix.
Frankie: You heard Lexy though, it’s not gonna matter, she’ll win the whole thing.
Greyson: Orlando Cruze, Lexy Chapel, Cindy Todd, Serenity, and now Andre Jordan all staking claim to winning the Rumble, what a field of entrants we have this year.
Sparkles: Can you imagine what’ll happen if Andre and Orlando meet up in that Rumble?
Greyson: God help us all.
A gentle knock is given to the door. And who is that gently, gently tapping on the chamber door? It’s not a raven, it’s Tabitha…Tabitha Silverstone. She looks extra cautious when standing just outside a room reserved for a woman who would give Edgar Allen Poe the creeps, Mika Kozlov. A second is taken to look away from the door that leads to Mika’s den of depravities, Tabitha peaking over her shoulder to make sure no one is watching. When there is no answer to her knocks Tabitha gets a bit bolder, deciding to just step on in. The door starts to open, revealing that Mika Kozlov and her muscle Borislav are indeed inside, but they are so deep in conversation that they could care less who’s been knocking and now who’s just invading their dressing room.
Mika: I have strong will power, I can stay away from my Chocolate Pudding for just one night, no matter how much I want to devour him.
Mika: Don’t you worry, I’ll have my Pudding, and I’ll eat him too. As for tonight though, I’m too busy to worry about Andre. I have my sestra and I have my New Eden right where we want them. Everything is coming together so perfectly (claps giddily).
Borislav lunges up from the chair he was sitting in and alerts the pacing Mika to the intruder. Instantly Tabitha puts her hands up, showing that they are empty and implying that if they weren’t they’d be occupied by a white flag.
Tabitha: Relax big boy, I’m not here to stir up trouble.
Mika: Awww….just when I was starting to appreciate you for your trouble making skills.
Tabitha: I’m here to THANK YOU.
Mika: Thank me? Little old me? I’m so touched. I’m-I’m MOVED. Did you get me a present? A card at least? You know, to really show how much you appreciate me?
Tabitha: Nooooo, sorry sweety, didn’t think that far ahead.
Mika: Ah, you’re an impulsive one. (Bumps the side of her fist against her heart) I feel ya, homie.
Tabitha: Anyway, I wanted to thank you for spending so much QUALITY time with my client. I think you really rubbed off on Andre.
Mika: I did grind on him for a while.
Tabitha: Yeeeeah, thank you. You’ve given him….
Mika: Not STDS. I have been tested.
Tabitha: No, not that. You’ve given him EDGE. You’ve given him….DARKNESS.
Mika: I think his genetics are responsible for that.
Tabitha: You know what I mean, Mika.
Mika: Sure I do. And I hope you know something as well. That I am just getting started with your boy-toy.
Tabitha’s face lights up.
Tabitha: That’s fine. Because you truly are what’s best for Andre. Now if only I could find someone to help Marina the same way you’re helping Andre.
Mika: Well (points over her shoulder with her thumb) Borislav’s single.
Marina: Is everything in place?
Victoria: Trust me, it’s all taken care of.
Cameras catch the conversation between Marina Valdivia and Victoria Salinas in medias res. The two stand in a somewhat secluded part of a backstage corridor and for good reason, they don’t want very many eavesdroppers overhearing what these two longtime friends are discussing.
Victoria: By the end of the night all of Andre’s doubts, all of his suspicions about Tabitha, are going to be confirmed, then we’ll all be free from that disgusting, two-faced, hideous beast.
Marina: It’s hard to believe it’s come to this.
Victoria: It’s hard to believe it took this long.
Cameras open on a poster, a huge poster that proudly honors acclaimed IWC grappler Rachel Tatum Lee. The image of her bolstering the NHB Title is on display in the halls of the Manhattan Center, just one of multiple tributes to a number of high profile athletes who have graced an IWC ring. It won’t be hanging there for very long, the poster is being taken down off the wall by two stagehands.
Kat: Take it down…take everything associated with ‘she who shall not be named’ down.
The present holder of the NHB Title comes into view, directing her minions in their redecoration efforts. Kat Kelly might be a champion but she steps forth with no sight of her championship, though what she does have is a black burlap sack that has what is shaped like a title belt inside.
Stagehand: What do you want us to do with it?
Kat: Use it as toilet paper for all I care. Actually, you know what-you know what, take it to Mya Denton and Aaron Harrison. Those two love ‘she who will not be named’ so much, I’m sure they can flap to this all niiiight long.
Stagehand: You know, no one has seen Mya all night.
Kat: And you’re complaining about this? If you’re so worried about Mya then put out a friggin amber alert. (Kat swipes her hand through the air) Screw Mya. I didn’t give you twenty bucks to stand there yammering about her, now get back to work!
Kat watches as the poster is taken away.
Greyson: Kat Kelly remaining true to her word. She said that she was going to sanitize the IWC of any and all association with Rachel Tatum Lee.
Sparkles: Rachel walked out on the IWC several weeks ago, and in the process left behind the NHB Title….
Frankie: And now it’s aaaaaall Kat’s, and you know, she’s promised to unveil a drastic redesign of the championship by the end of the night.
Greyson: Hopefully it will be in time for her scheduled defense of that very championship when she puts the gold on the line against challenger Aaron Harrison. Two weeks ago Harrison was close to taking that NHB Title from Kat in order to honor his savior Rachel Tatum Lee.
Sparkles: He’ll get another shot at honoring Rachel tonight though when he tries to take the NHB Title from Kat, LEGALLY, in the middle of that ring.
Patience is a virtue and Selena Frost is discovering that the longer and longer that she waits on the arrival of the man who stole her Queen of Wrestling Title. All night long Selena has been sitting in the parking garage, plopped down on a chair and watching the entrance, hoping that Desmond Drake will be arriving soon and with her belt in his possession. Finally there are headlights off in the distance as a car slowly begins to cruise into the Manhattan Center. Selena can be seen rising from the chair with her knuckles clinched into fists and rising to her sides.
Greyson: Is that Desmond Drake arriving to the Manhattan Center?
Sparkles: Selena Frost has been waiting on him to bring back her title.
Greyson: I don’t know what Selena wants more, the title, or Drake’s head on a pike.
Frankie: She better be wary, because fucking with Drake is like fucking the woman from the movie Teeth. It’s deadly.
Riot returns to the ring just as the theme song commonly associated with Victoria Salinas is starting to wind down. We see both she and her friend Marina Valdivia headed for the squared circle, and they do not walk out alone. Trailing behind them is a gangly young stagehand who is nervously chewing on his nails as he follows these athletes towards the squared circle.
Sparkles: The ring has been a revolving door tonight. A lot of airing of grievances.
Frankie: Yeah, we’ve had so many grievances aired you’d think it was Festivus around here.
Greyson: That’s fitting, cause I’m sure we’ll be getting more than a few feats of strength as well.
Sparkles: Right now it’s Marina Valdivia and Victoria Salinas taking center-stage.
Frankie: And who’s that douche with them? A fluffer?
All will be explained once Victoria, Marina and their guest are in the squared circle.
Victoria: It’s not easy when someone you trust, someone you care about, uses a water fountain to bust through a window and escape from the cuckoo’s nest. What I’m trying to say is that it’s difficult dealing with those we thought we could depend on when they go off the reservation.
Frankie: Can we get a translation for Victoria’s translation? What the fuck is the bitch talking about? I’ve heard women talk clearer with my balls in their mouth.
Victoria: When my friend Marina (puts a hand on Marina Valdivia’s shoulder) came into the IWC, she did so with some trust issues. She had a few bad experiences warp her perception of this business. It made it difficult…difficult for her to believe in anyone. So when she opened herself up and made herself available to Tabitha Silverstone, it was a very difficult decision. But you know what, she did it. She put herself out there and she placed her trust, her faith and her CAREER in Tabitha’s hands. I know how hard that was for Marina, so you have to understand why I’m so damned sickened by the way that Tabitha has abused that trust, that faith, and that career.
It’s a good thing that Marina is letting Victoria do all the talking, cause she might be a bit too emotive to make any type of sense should she be given a microphone.
Victoria: Tabitha has used her position as an agent, and as Marina’s ‘friend’ to manipulate her, to twist her, to try and transform her into something she’s not. And she’s doing the exact same thing to Andre Jordan. She’s been setting both of them up for months, and now she’s finally crossed a line there’s no going back from. Tabitha went way too far this time, and there’s not any ‘post-concussion syndrome’ bullshit that can explain away her actions. I have proof, irrefutable proof that Tabitha was the mastermind behind Andre Jordan’s abduction.
The Stagehand who had been comfortably loitering in the background is now pulled into the spotlight.
Victoria: Tell them.
The mic is pressed against the young man’s chest. After taking a very deep breath he lets loose with his revelation.
Stagehand: Four weeks ago I….
Victoria: Tell them!
Stagehand: I saw Tabitha walking into Mika Kozlov’s dressing room moments before Andre was abducted. Then, later that night, I saw Mika and Borislav leaving the building with Dre as their captive. When I asked Tabitha about it, she offered to bribe me in order to keep my mouth shut. I really-really wanted to tell everyone the truth, but Tabitha, she-she threatened me and FORCED me to take her money.
Victoria: Thank you…
Stagehand: It makes me sick knowing that I could have helped Andre….
Victoria: I said THANK YOU.
The Stagehand is pushed into the background. All of Victoria’s focus goes from the stagehand and to the entry way.
Victoria: Tabitha, I think you owe me, I think you owe Andre, and I think you owe Marina an explanation. Not that any you give us will make up for what you’ve done.
A door comes flying open backstage as Andre Jordan empties out of the locker-room and into the hall. A gym bag with all his gear inside is thrown over his shoulder and lugged along towards the exit. His departure is impeded by the woman frantically racing after him, his agent Tabitha Silverstone.
Tabitha: You’re not buying this….Come on!
No matter how loud Tabitha pleads Dre doesn’t listen. He doesn’t even look back in her direction, he just keeps on walking and walking.
Tabitha: They don’t even have any proof. It’s just Victoria’s word against mine. She’s only trying to turn you and Marina against me. Can’t you see that?
Andre doesn’t see anything but the door at the end of the hall that serves as the exit from the arena.
Selena: You have something that belongs to me half-squat!
It’s a good thing that Desmond Drake is wearing black pants. He finds it very difficult to hold his urine when he’s got his back pressed to the grill of his car and a chair embedded against his throat. Selena Frost is leaning down into her makeshift weapon as it grinds against Drake’s esophagus. There are no security guards in the parking garage who can aid Drake at the moment, leaving him completely at the mercy of a woman he has wronged multiple times over the past several weeks.
Selena: I told you this was how it would end. Now where is it? Where’s my Title?
It isn’t easy for Drake to answer when he’s got a chair crushing his throat.
Selena: Answer me!
All Drake can respond with our coughs and groans. Finally Selena lets up on the pressure she was applying against his trachea.
Drake: In the trunk (coughing), in the trunk!
His pint sized body slides down the car until he’s on his butt. Selena leaves him, for the moment, so she can grab what truly matters to her, the Queen of Wrestling Title that was stolen from her. Selena moves to the trunk, finds the release button and pops it open. What she expects to see is gold, but instead it’s steel. A pipe swings from the interior of the trunk and cracks Selena between the eyes. The shot across the skull has sent Selena collapsing to the ground, hands clasping her face. Just then her attacker reveals herself…or maybe not so much. The woman who exits the trunk is covered head to toe in black garbs with a ski mask shielding her true identity. In one hand we can see the pipe she just bashed Selena in the face with, in the other hand is the Queen of Wrestling title.
Drake: Come on! Come on!!
Drake shouts to the masked woman who goes racing around the car and towards the entrance to the arena. A still coughing Drake follows her into the building. All the while Selena grabs at a bumper and uses it to start dragging herself up to her feet, struggling through the concussing blow she just received.
A brief video package plays, and it’s not just that wonderful filler garbage we get to kill time between the end of one show and the start of another. All that can be seen at the moment is darkness, but what can be heard are the sounds of thunder. No, that’s not thunder, that’s the rumble of hundreds stomping their feet and clapping their hands.
The camera slowly rises and rises and, guess what, it rises some more, passing out of shadows and to sand. At last we see the source of this thunderous ovation, and it happens to be coming from the screaming spectators gathered in the circular stands that surround the pits of an arena. The crowds dressed in their ancient roman attire cut lose with screams at the sight of the gladiators fighting to the death on the sands below them. But this clash is just an appetizer before the main course.
Trumpets suddenly sound from the balcony where royalty watches on. All attention is drawn from the blood spilled across the amphitheater to the figure who presides over this chaos. Seated upon a throne in a toga with golden fleece is IWC President Drew Bryant. His eyes seem glazed over and listless, losing interest in the battles waging beneath his feet.
Soon the wandering eyes of the crazed crowd draw to the goiter hung from the throat of a portly announcer. He stands with one arm over his pot belly, the other gesturing to the pits so far below him.
Announcer: King Drewontavius Bryantis is pleased to present to you the main attraction of the third annual Invictus games.
More trumpets blare as flower petals shower the two combatants emerging from the dungeons. Shields are held in front of the already armored bodies of the gladiators, who walk in sandals across the sands. Eventually they reach the center of the fighting pits, turning to Bryantis and offering the their very lives.
Fighters: We who are about to die salute you!
Instead of lifting weapons aloft in tribute to the ruler, either athlete raise what appear to be Championship belts. The gold in their hands reflect the bright sun hung over head, the light also gleaming from their helmets. That armor is soon removed from their heads so as to give Drewontavius a better look at their faces. Uprising brand World Champion Vanilla Skyy and Riot brand World Champion Katelyn Buehler, allow the world a peek at their fierce, unshakable expressions.
The eyes of the fighters and those of the hundreds and hundreds of spectators closely watch the ruler rise from his throne. At last he gestures for the conflict to commence. And it shall start precisely on his cue with Skyy and Katelyn grabbing their respective spears and raising them over shoulder. They crouch into fighting stances, readying for a battle not of ultimate supremacy but to the death. Katelyn smiles and Skyy winks as the war begins.
And if you think you’re going to see it, think again stupid!
Instead what we see are the following words flashing across the screen.
COMING TO NIMES ARENA 2016
Unlike two weeks ago we find Principle Owner Karen McBride back in her throne…okay, so it’s more like an ergonomic leather office chair, but you get the symbolism. Karen is in the central hub of power…okay, so it’s more like an office only slightly bigger than a cubical, but it’s still where all the business is being taken care of. That’s just what Karen is doing at the moment, taking care of so much business it would make Bachman Turner Overdrive giddy. She’s kicked back in her chair, the ergonomic one, with a phone to her ear and her knuckles tapping along the edge of the desk directly in front of her.
Karen: Alright-alright, you tell Desmond Drake that if he doesn’t get his ass in that ring later on tonight WITH the Queen of Wrestling Championship then he can consider this his final night as part of the IWC roster. You give him that message, understood?
Like a ping-pong ball McBride finds herself ricocheting from one situation straight into another.
Karen: Whoa-whoa-whoa, what was that? (Pauses) What do you mean that no one has seen Mya Denton? (Pauses) Yeah, I know she’s wrestling tonight, who the hell do you think booked her? (Winces as if suffering a migraine) Here I am giving her a crack at the World Champion and she doesn’t even bother to show up to the building? (Pauses to listen) Repeat that. (One last pause) So Aaron Harrison is claiming that HE’S responsible for Mya not being here yet….and that he’ll only produce her for her match against the champ IF we play some footage he put together?
Dealing with the talent on the IWC roster is proving to be particularly straining tonight.
Karen: Have you seen the footage Harrison wants to play? Well I’m not letting it air until I’ve had the chance to take a look at….it……..my……self. Hey, I’ll call you right back.
Her sentence trails off and the phone hangs up, because someone has just entered her office that DEMANDS her attention Martin Howe III, the prolific agent of the infamous Miss Jon, slips into a chair on the opposite side of McBride’s desk and gets casual. He even reaches out and takes a few pistachios off the candy tray in front of the Principle Owner.
Karen: Is there something I can help you with, Howe?
Howe: (Obnoxiously chewing on pistachios) I certainly hope so. (Picking shells out of his teeth and putting them on Karen’s desk) Two weeks ago I had a conversation with that real cute baby sister of yours, and I asked her to make a proposition to you on my behalf.
Karen: (Using a dust brush to knock the chewed shells off her desk) Melanie didn’t say anything to me about any proposition.
Howe: That doesn’t surprise me. With all due respect, your sister doesn’t make much of a secretary.
Karen: She’s NOT my secretary.
Howe: Thank God for that.
Karen will give him a pass on that insult, just this once.
Howe: I’ll tell you what I told your sister. I’ve managed to domesticate my client, I’ve got the Destroyer of Beauty under control….for now. If you didn’t see her match two weeks ago, which is understandable considering you were dealing with all that Monarchy gruff, Miss Jon respected the rules of her contest and she respected her opponents. I think that she deserves some type of special recognition for that, don’t you?
Karen: You want me to ‘reward’ your client for simply acting like a professional?
Howe: There’s a tone in your voice, Mrs. McBride.
Karen: Is there?
Howe: I don’t think you appreciate how hard it is for Miss Jon to….behave. But ever since she accidentally struck you with that back fist four weeks ago, she’s been fighting and fighting to turn over a new leaf. This isn’t easy for her.
Karen: Martin, I DO appreciate that your client played by the rules two weeks ago, but I’m not entirely sold that she’s actually changed her ways. If anything, I think you’ve got her playing a role, and you two are playing me as a patsy. That’s not happening. So be a doll and tell your client that if she wants me to consider her for potential title matches down the line, that she needs to continue to respect the rules, respect her fellow athletes, and respect authority.
This conversation did not go the way that Howe thought it would. In fact, McBride’s edict has him so sickened that he just spits out all the remaining pistachios he had in his mouth into the palm of his hand. They drop in crumbles to the floor as he walks out of the office. Karen gets right back to business, picking up the phone and picking up the conversation she was having moments ago where she left off.
Karen: It’s me again. Listen, you tell Harrison that he is not to air anything (pauses)…wait-wait-wait, what do you mean he’s already on his way to the ring? I didn’t give my approval for that footage to be played!
Tabitha Silverstone begs, Tabitha Silverstone pleads, Tabitha Silverstone whines, but nothing she says, nothing she does, has any effect whatsoever on her client Andre Jordan. His back stays turned in her direction as his body moves across the parking garage in the direction of his car. The gym bag he was seen vacating the locker-room with earlier tonight is thrown into the passenger seat before he starts to slip himself behind the steering wheel.
Tabitha: Dre, please just listen to me. You’re being totally unreasonable right now.
Finally Dre stops and hits Karen with a stare so intense it could melt the skin from her body.
Tabitha: Would you at least hear my side of the story?
Andre: I need time….to think.
Tabitha: Time? TIME!?! How much time?
Dre doesn’t specify. The driver’s door shuts right in front of Tabitha’s face and the car carrying her client backs towards the exit of the parking garage. Tabitha watches him leave, powerless to stop him. It isn’t until his taillights have vanished that she stops watching the car and turns to show the camera her despondent expression. But it’s not the camera that catches the look on her face. What she didn’t realize is that Victoria Salinas and Marina Valdivia were stood mere inches behind her, watching this whole scene play out. While Victoria smiles, enjoying the sight of Tabitha getting her comeuppance, Marina looks legitimately broken by the image of her agent suffering the consequences of her actions.
Tabitha steps right up into Victoria’s face.
Tabitha: YOU caused this.
Marina: No…(Marina steps between Victoria and Tabitha)…SHE didn’t.
The pair walk away and leave Tabitha standing there….ALONE.
Aaron Harrison’s face, it’s the very first thing that everyone gets an extreme close up of when the show cuts back to the interior of the Manhattan Center. Stood directly at ringside is where we find Harrison, his mug mere inches from the lens of a camera. His customary hooded jacket hangs over both his head and his body, though on this occasion the shroud unsuccessfully shadows his expression. And on this occasion it’s one of ‘happiness.’
Harrison: Are we back? Are we live?
The camera-man is too petrified by the very dangerous Harrison to give him an answer. So Harrison has to take matters into his own hands, quite literally. He reaches out and he snatches the headset completely off of the cameraman’s ears and then places it over his own.
Harrison: Are we back?
Harrison speaks straight into the microphone extending down from the earphones.
Harrison: (Waiting for an answer from the production truck) Then what the hell are we waiting for? Why aren’t we airing it? Why aren’t we airing MY tribute to Rachel Tatum Lee?
Finally the commentators manage to get a word in, only able to speculate as to what Harrison’s motivations are at this point.
Frankie: Do we reaaaaaally need an extreme close up of Aaron Harrison’s face? I’d rather we get a close up of the red ass cheeks of a baboon.
Sparkles: Why does the thought of that thrill Sparkles?
Greyson: Because the both of you are absolutely disturbed, as is the man presently at ringside. Aaron Harrison scheduled to take on Kat Kelly for the NHB Championship, a belt that Harrison’s savior, Rachel Ta…..
Frankie: Nuh-nuh-nuh….don’t you do it.
Greyson: Don’t I do what?
Frankie: Don’t you dare mention ‘she who will not be named.’
Greyson: I’m not going to abide by that ridiculous demand made by Kat Kelly two weeks ago.
Frankie: It’s pretty much a company-wide policy now. We’re never to mention the former NHB Champion after she walked out on our company, and more importantly walked out on me.
Greyson: It’s not a company-wide mandate just because Kat says so. She does not work in the head office.
Frankie: But she is part of Monarchy, and in case you haven’t heard yet, THEY RULE.
At the moment Harrison is openly defying all the rules Kat Kelly made explicitly clear two weeks earlier. He doesn’t just reference the woman Kat took the NHB Title belt from, he actually looks to honor her. Harrison keeps the headset on and continues to employ the mic attached to it as he rolls into the middle of the ring.
Harrison: I said role the tribute! The IWC had the chance to air one of their own two weeks ago, now it’s MY turn. I know Rachel is watching, and I know she’ll appreciate what I’ve done in her namesake. She needs to see me finish what she started. She needs to see the first steps in the apocalypse….in the destruction of the federation that ruined her, that ruined me, and that ruined Mya Denton.
Frankie: Is everyone just gonna come out here and speak gibberish tonight? Everyone who’s come out here have been harder to understand than Bane in the batman movies.
Greyson: From what I can gather, it seems that Harrison has put together some type of video tribute to Ra….*BEEP*
The camera briefly cuts to Greyson Lovejoy at commentary fidgeting with his headset as if there’s something wrong.
Greyson: Huh, seems we had some type of technical glitch here. Anyway, as I was saying, Harrison is trying to honor Ra….*BEEP*…
Again Greyson is seen smacking his earphones.
Sparkles: Let Sparkles finish your thought for you. Harrison is out here to play a video in recognition of his former leader Rac…*BEEP*…What the heck, now Sparkles’ headset is malfunctioning.
Back inside of the ring things are only going even more haywire. Harrison has hijacked the show and isn’t leaving until he sees a certain video playing over the Cartel-tron. He goes on shouting into the headset.
Harrison: You told me you’d play the footage (shouting through the mic to the production crew). Now air it! Show my tribute to Rac….*BEEP*
Harrison’s face twists with confusion.
The headset Harrison was using is taken off and he now studies it in an attempt to diagnose the problem. However, the headset isn’t the problem he should be dealing with at the moment. A black burlap sack that holds something in the shape of a championship belt collides right with the back of Harrison’s skull. The audience is all over Harrison’s attacker, Kat Kelly. With stealth she’s managed to jump from the crowd, jump into the ring and jump Harrison. After laying Aaron out Kat throws her arms out to her sides, a sack dangling from one of them.
Frankie: KAT! KAT KELLY! THANK YOU!
Greyson: Kat Kelly, where-where-where did she just come from?
Frankie: Heaven. Or my sexual fantasies. I guess they’re both basically the same thing.
Sparkles: She came out of the crowd and caught Harrison completely off guard, bashing him with that sack she’s got there in her hand.
There is now something more than a sack clutched in Kat’s palms because she’s managed to get her hands around a microphone as well.
Kat: Why won’t you listen, Harrison? (Crouching down towards her laid out victim) Why do you keep trying to bring ‘HER’ up? I told you…no…I WARNED you two weeks ago that the FORMER NHB Champion will never be referenced again. Monarchy are going to scrub her name from the IWC completely. That’s why I’ve taken the liberty of having her name bleeped out any time someone, like you, tries to mention her.
Greyson: WHAT!?! Hold on. She’s censoring us?
Kat: And I’m about to do even more to sanitize ‘she who will not be named’ from this federation. (Lifts the burlap sack she bashed Harrison in the skull with) Here in my hand is a belt that at one time was synonymous with a classless, redneck. A belt that epitomized the former champion’s lack of morals, and total absence of class. Well now that I’M the champ, and Monarchy are calling all the shots around here, I’ve given the title a total overhaul. As of this moment, the NHB Title is as dead as the career of the trailer park moonshine swilling cowgirl who once held it. Behold a new title, one that encapsulates grace, poise and sheer swank. From the ashes of the NHB Title ascends the KAT KELLY Championship.
The NHB Title is removed from the sack though it looks radically different. Slapped over the gold nameplate is a picture of Kat Kelly’s smiling face. All the grunge and all the grittiness has been erased and in its place are images of Kat striking elegant poses.
Greyson: Someone PLEASE tell me that this is a joke.
Sparkles: Harrison isn’t laughing at it.
Frankie: Because it’s not a joke. It’s a revelation is what it is. Thank you, Kat Kelly (stands up and starts clapping) thank you for helping us do away with that classless NHB Title and replacing it with a championship that we can all be proud of.
Greyson: Kat is about as CLASSLESS as they come. She’s out here disparaging a title that Ra….*BEEP*….SERIOUSLY!?! Kat and Monarchy are going to have me censored every time I even try to say the name Ra…*BEEP*…For fuck sakes.
Kat goes on celebrating with her modified NHB Title belt, though the changes she made to the championship may have all been for nothing. The moment she turns back towards the man she bashed in the head with the gold, Harrison damn near cuts her in half with a spear.
Frankie: THAT SON OF A BITCH!!
Greyson: Harrison spearing Kat out of her boots!
Sparkles: He planted that shoulder straight into her uterus.
Greyson: And it looks to me like that’s not all Harrison is going to do. Kat might not be holding onto her ‘Kat Kelly’ Championship for very long because Harrison is set to challenge her for it here tonight…no….here right now!
KAT KELLY© VS. AARON HARRISON:
A referee is in the ring and his hand is gesturing for the bell to be rung.
Aaron Harrison is immediately following up his spear with something that will hurt even worse. He rolls from the squared circle and doesn’t return empty handed. Clutched in his palms is a trashcan retrieved from under the ring. He wedges the steel between the top and the middle rope, making sure it’s firmly in place. He now pulls Kat up onto his shoulder and backs into the corner opposite to the one the trashcan has been situated in.
Frankie: What are you doing, Harrison? Don’t you dare. I’m warning you. I’M WARNING YOU!
Sparkles: Sparkles doesn’t think he’s listening.
Frankie: Lovejoy, give me your shoe so I can throw it at Harrison.
Greyson: Hell no.
It would take more than a shoe to stop Harrison. He takes off across the ring and throws the holder of the Kat Kelly Championship off his shoulder and sends her flying like a long dart face first into the trashcan. Her skull bounces from the steel and the impact sends her staggering right back into Harrison’s waiting hands. He takes the barely conscious Kat by the hair, drags her around into a full circle and then uses that momentum to fling her forehead into the trashcan a SECOND time.
Frankie: This is NOT classy! And that’s what the Kat Kelly title is SUPPOSED to represent dammit!
Greyson: Kat nor her title have any idea what class is about.
Frankie: I could smack you in your whorish mouth right now for just saying that.
The only one getting smacked around is Kat Kelly, who rolls to the middle of the ring after suffering a second impact with a trashcan wedged in the corner of the ring. Harrison isn’t interested in pinning her, he wants to keep inflicting punishment on her. He takes the trashcan down out of the corner and places it on top of Kat’s chest before racing into the ropes at her side, ricocheting off then leaping into a back first senton splash straight across the weapon he had positioned over his opposition. Now Harrison drags Kat up from the ring and gives her a nasty scoop slam right down onto a trashcan that is just as banged up as the defending champion.
Harrison enjoyed hearing her scream so much the first time he wants an encore performance. He pulls Kat into another scoop slam into the trashcan, inflicting even greater damage on her back. He then walks out of the ring, reaches under it and this time what finds its way into his clutches is a TABLE.
Frankie: Tables? No. Nuh-uh. Those aren’t legal under Kat Kelly Championship rules.
Greyson: When was this specified?
Frankie: Just now. I uhhh got a lamented copy of the Kat Kelly Championship rules and regulations right here.
Greyson: Frankie, that’s a Jimmy Johns menu.
The building enjoys watching Harrison inflict punishment on Kat just as much as Harrison enjoys dishing it out. The table will be instrumental in hurting Kat even more. Instead of setting the table up completely, he only utilizes one set of legs. As a result the table is left diagonally slanted at ringside. After setting the table in position Harrison rolls into the squared circle, scoops his opponent up into his arms and prepares to deliver a move so brutal that if it doesn’t end Kat’s career it will definitely takes years off of it. He runs across the ring and throws Kat over the top rope with a scoop slam that sends her flying not down into the floor mats but through the slanted table.
Frankie: (Screeching) AAAAAAAHHHH!!
Sparkles: That was-that was-that was…..CRAY-CRAY!
The table has exploded and so too did Kat’s body when going through it. She now lies totally motionless at ringside and is perhaps regretting blindsiding Harrison with the title belt before this match got underway. Harrison rolls from the squared circle and once at ringside Kat is back in his possession. He forces Kat’s mangled body onto his shoulder, runs the length of the floor mats and then throws his adversary down with a snake eyes right onto the ringside barricade.
Frankie: This needs to stop, somebody needs to stop this. Harrison should be disqualified.
Greyson: It’s a NHB Title match Frankie, there are no disqualifications.
Frankie: It’s NOT a NHB Title match you idiot, it’s a Kat Kelly Championship match, meaning the rules have changed.
Kat’s chin cracks against the barricade and the blow leaves her so disorientated that it sends her absent mindedly stumbling back into her opponent’s clutches. Once again the Challenger has hoisted Kat up onto his shoulder and is running the length of the ringside mats, going for a SECOND snake eyes. Right before calamity can ensue once again for the champion she manages to slip out of harm’s way. She slides off Harrison’s shoulders, lands behind him and then gives him a shove that sends him hurdling face first towards the steel ring-post. Harrison just manages to miss the post by a fraction of an inch. He steps around the post and breathes a sigh of relief. Sadly he might have just counted his chickens before the eggs could hatch. He has no idea that Kat is running across the mats and then leaping from ringside through the ropes, right past the turnbuckle post and into a tornado DDT that spikes Harrison’s head into the floor mats.
Greyson: GAHD ALMIGHTY!
Frankie: You got it babe! Now finish this already!
Kat knows even after that DDT she hasn’t done enough to accomplish that. Nevertheless she makes the cover on Harrison, pinning his back to the floor mats.
Greyson: Falls count anywhere.
Frankie: A rule that still stands under Kat Kelly Championship rules.
It doesn’t surprise Kat at all that Harrison kicks out. It pisses her off but it doesn’t shock her. She rolls Harrison back into the ring where the challenger is crawling, crawling his way across the ring and towards the trashcan that has been decimated throughout the course of this contest. He ends up crouched directly over the steel and he’s about to get even closer to it.
Kat has climbed to the apron and then goes springing up to the top rope before flying across the ring into a double stomp that hits Harrison right between the shoulder blades. The blow sends Harrison’s face hurdling into the trashcan.
Greyson: Gaaaah, that was….
Frankie: Breathtaking. Bravo Kat, brav-friggin-o.
What Kat hits next is every bit as devastating as that double stomp she just delivered. She wraps her legs around Harrison’s neck and begins to do push-ups that drive her challenger’s face against the trashcan again and again and again.
Sparkles: Is Kat humping the back of Harrison’s head? I’ve had dogs do that to Sparkles before.
Greyson: That’s unfortunate.
Sparkles: Not really, Sparkles paid for it.
The trashcan smashes across the bridge of Harrison’s nose once more before Kat finally rolls her opponent over onto his back and then reaches out hooking his far leg.
Once again the challenger manages to launch his shoulder up from the ring. Kat is not pleased by this, not in the slightest. She rolls from the squared circle and from beneath she manages to procure yet another table.
Greyson: Hey Frankie. What were you saying about tables not being permitted under Kat Kelly title rules?
Frankie: There’s been a last second amendment made.
Greyson: Sure Frankie, suuuuree.
It takes what strength Kat has left to slide the wood into the ring and then follow it inside. She sets the table and then leads Harrison along towards it. After a few hard punches across the face Harrison is sent rolling onto the surface of the table. It now appears that he’s totally exposed for whatever Kat decides to do to him next. Whatever it is it’s not going to be very pleasant. Kat climbs up onto the table in front of Harrison, leading him to his feet and slapping some fists across his face.
Greyson: These two are in a very precarious predicament.
Sparkles: Someone is going through that table.
Frankie: That someone won’t be Kat Kelly gosh dammit!
Kat ensures that when she hits a boot to Harrison’s ribs, doubles him over and places him in a front chancery. It looks like a DDT is about to put his head through the table. But Harrison has had his fill of being at his adversary’s mercy. He stands up straight and back drops Kat off the table all the way down to the canvas below.
Frankie: NO! Well, at least she didn’t go through the table.
Sparkles: How much height did Kat get before finally coming down to the ring off that back drop?
Pain flows through Kat’s body as she desperately tries to get to her feet. Somehow she’s back on her feet only to be removed from them when Harrison drags her by the wrist into a short arm clothesline so forceful that it sends her corkscrewing through the air. Kat should consider herself lucky that her head stayed on her shoulders after that impact. She is left totally incapacitated, meaning that now fortune favors her opponent. Harrison pulls Kat up from the ring and into a double underhook, signifying that his finishing move the Hybrid Theory is coming.
Greyson: Harrison is right on the verge here of winning the title.
Sparkles: He’ll do it if he drops Kat on top of her head with this move.
Harrison goes to lift Kat into the air to deliver the double underhook face buster but Kat’s weight shifts, delivering her from evil. She comes down onto her feet and then swings one across her body in order to spin herself out of the clutch on her arms. She turns totally around to face Harrison then leaps into the air, going for a code breaker. Harrison manages to avoid having his face crushed against Kat’s knees by giving her a shove, one so forceful that it sends her flying back first straight into the turnbuckle. Kat bounces off the corner and then bounces back into Harrison’s arms. He catches her with a t-bone suplex with the bridge into the pin.
Kat still has the strength left to kick out. So that means Harrison will have to hit her with something a bit more permanent in the damage department. He pulls Kat along towards the corner, the one closest to the table that was positioned by the champion earlier. She’s going to regret putting it in place when Harrison heaves her up and sits her on the top rope with the intent of putting her through the wood. Though he’s endured quite a few agonizing blows throughout the course of this match Harrison climbs up the corner to the top rope and snags hold of Kat’s neck.
Greyson: He’s gonna superplex her, he’s gonna superplex her through the table.
Frankie: No don’t. Don’t. God…GOD do something. I don’t ask for much, since you’ve already given me six pack abs and a beautiful face, but can you please do me a solid and save Kat?
There might be nothing that can save Kat as Harrison hoists her into the air and prepares to drive her through the table. Wait, Kat saves HERSELF. Somehow Kat manages to float over Harrison’s shoulders, and land on the middle rope beside him. She immediately puts a shoulder to Harrison’s back and then gives him a suplex….She pulls him right off the corner and places him through the table. Unfortunately for the champion, she put HERSELF through the table as well.
Frankie: DIVINE INTERVENTION!
Greyson: Harrison’s back going through the table with a-with a-with a SUPER back drop suplex!
Sparkles: Kat put herself through the table too though.
Harrison lies amongst the fragments of wood clinging to a badly strained spine, and Kat isn’t looking like she’s in any better shape than her challenger. The two remain spread across the broken table showing absolutely no indications of life. The referee doesn’t want to do it, God does he not want to aggravate the audience and the lurkers on so many internet forums who will undoubtedly make many mocking memes poking fun at his decision, but he has to do what he has to do. He counts both Kat and Harrison out then calls for the bell.
Frankie: What the hell did that dumb zebra just do?
Greyson: The only thing he could in his position. He stopped the match on account of the fact that neither Kat nor Harrison could continue fighting.
Sparkles: That’s not going to make the fans happy.
Frankie: To hell with the fans, I’M the one who’s not gonna be happy. Kat was well on her way to retaining her title.
Greyson: Really? Cause it looks to me like Kat was fighting for her life.
It’s with a heavy heart that the referee continues to signal for the bell to be rang. He then grabs the Kat Kelly Championship, bringing it to the middle of the ring. He starts to help the champion out of the wreckage, but it’s not the official’s assistance that Kat is interested in. She snags the title right out of the ref’s hands then goes rolling from the squared circle with it. Although she’s too banged up to even breath it doesn’t keep her screaming just before she drops to her knees.
Kat: AND STILL KAT KELLY CHAMPION!
What’s left of Kat Kelly’s strength is used up as she crawls up the ramp with NH…no, the Kat Kelly Title.. As Kat leaves the ring Harrison starts to push himself up from it. He crawls out of the broken wood and to the middle of the squared circle. Although he doesn’t have a title, he DOES have a microphone.
Harrison: Play it!
Harrison just won’t give up. Even after being put through the table he’s STILL adamant about seeing his video ‘tribute’ play over the Cartel-tron.
Harrison: I will honor Rac….*BEEP*…one way or another. NOW PLAY THE FOOTAGE.
His hands reach out from the ring and this time they’re not latching onto a headset, they’re grabbing hold of a stagehand’s neck. Although Harrison has got little left in the way of strength he still can throttle the wiry throat until he gets what he wants.
Greyson: Harrison can barely move and he’s still…STILL ordering the production crew to play that footage.
Frankie: It’s not gonna happen Harrison, accept it already, move on. This is just like people who still think they’ll bring back Han Solo. Stop living in denial!
Sparkles: You just made Sparkles cry….a lot.
There might be a few more tears shed when the video that Harrison has been demanding goes unaired. Those tears will be coming from the production crew member that Harrison is strangling.
Greyson: Someone help that crewmember.
Frankie: Yeah Lovejoy, why don’t you pop in there and save him?
Sparkles: Go ahead Lovejoy, rescue the damsel in distress.
Greyson: I’ll pass thank you very much.
Harrison goes on wailing upon the crew-member until they have stopped flailing. Finally Harrison peels away from his victim, leaning back on his knees and shouting towards the rafters.
Harrison: You will be honored Ra….*BEEEEEEP*
There are a lot of unsettling noises emanating from beyond the door that Dan Douglas is stood right outside of. He has his arms folded across his chest and his back to the wall, lurking just off to the side of the bathroom. The agent cringes and winces each time he hears every gag, every cough and every moan that emanates from his client, the World Champion, Katelyn Buehler.
Douglas: Should I notify Mrs. McBride that we’re calling off your match?
It’s no longer groans and the sound of vomit splashing toilet water that comes from Buehler.
Katelyn: Don’t you dare.
At last Katelyn comes into view, swiping the back of her gloved hand across her lips. It appears as if she’s gotten over her digestive woes.
Douglas: Might not happen rather you want it to or not. Hearing that Mya Denton isn’t here to face you. No one’s seen her all night.
Katelyn: You think that really matters in the IWC? I’m sure someone else will step up and take me on. They’ll probably throw Franz, or Sailes, or the janitor at me.
Douglas: True. So uhhh you feeling better?
Katelyn: No. But I will….when you start telling me the truth.
Katelyn: I need you to be honest with me.
Douglas: Lies only complicate things, that’s why I never tell them.
Katelyn: Good, then this shouldn’t be a problem, did you-did you use your GIFT on me two weeks ago?
Douglas: (Trying to keep his smile) I’m afraid I’m not following you….You know I used my gift, I mean you consented to it.
Katelyn: Yeah, to help me get over my injuries, not to….
Douglas: Not to what?
Katelyn: Can’t believe I’m about to say this….to turn me into a friggin assassin.
Douglas: (Dismissively waving his palm and turning to leave) Don’t be ridiculous.
Katelyn: (Not letting Douglas walk away) Do you think I can’t put two and two together? People keep talking and talking about how I attacked Lexy Chapel, and every time I try to remember having even the slightest altercation with her, I can’t. Then I go to watch highlights from our last show and….I suddenly get so sick. So tell me, did you-did you SUGGEST that I go after Lexy?
Douglas: I (dwells on his answer) would never use my talents on you without your knowledge. We made that agreement, and I would never ever break it.
If the long and piercing stare that the World Champion is giving Douglas is any indication of what she’s thinking, her thoughts would not be to his liking.
There is a big grin sweeping across the features of the ‘Team Leader,’ ‘The Iconic,’ ‘the former World Champion’ Johnny Kingdom. There’s a reason he grins, it’s because all cameras are on him, and who doesn’t just adore having the spotlight, especially when you’re an egomaniac. He gets an extreme close up, with no distractions to take one’s focus off either his grin or his words. Even the background is a totally generic egg-shell white wall, put in place to ensure nothing sways one’s eyes away from Johnny’s mug. And oooooh how he is mugging for the camera.
Kingdom: Ladies and gentlemen, children between the ages of 12 and 35, we are just two weeks…TWO FRIGGIN WEEKS away from Last Stand.
Both of his thumbs shoot into the air.
Kingdom: And it promises to be a party bigger than Mardi Gras….
Confetti is tossed into the air and a necklace of beads are thrown around Kingdom’s neck. A bra comes flying in out of nowhere with Kingdom catching it and winking at the original owner.
Kingdom: This is like the final four of the NCAA Championship.
A basketball comes bouncing along towards the Team Leader. Once he catches the ball it’s balanced on the tip of his finger and spun by his other hand. Before he goes on speaking he totally takes his hands away from the basketball, which oddly enough remains floating in the air, floating and spinning. Now one can see the fishing line that it’s suspended from.
Kingdom: And what makes Last Stand just so darned (impersonating SNL Church Lady voice) special? It’s because of the Rumble. (Gets very serious) The most unpredictable match of the year. Where you don’t know who is coming at you next, and where they’re coming at you from. Where there’s no strategies, and there’s no game-plans. It all comes down to one thing and one thing only, SURVIVAL. Survival of the FITTEST.
Kingdom flexes a bicep.
Kingdom: And not to brag, but I do hit the elliptical machine for about thirty minutes a day, meaning I’m pretty damn fit. But does that really mean I’m a favorite? No. Because in the Rumble there ain’t no favorites. Everyone is on an even keel. Guys like Tyson Galloway stand just as good a chance of winning as guys like Kat Kelly. Because this match isn’t about pinfalls, it’s not about submissions, it’s about throwing someone’s ass over the top rope with both their footies SMACKIN’ the ground. And once that happens, you’re night is over, you’re day is done, pack your shit and get to stepping. You’ve been eliminated FOOL. Which means one of the other thirty or so ‘talents’ that have just entered the Rumble bumped up their odds to win the whole kitten-caboodle.
A Grammy award is thrown to Kingdom, who catches it and does what he does better than anyone else, MUGS.
Kingdom: What goes to the winner of this battle of attrition? No….not this.
The second he tosses the Grammy another trophy is thrown to him……a bowling trophy.
Kingdom: Not this either.
A shrunken head ends up landing against his chest.
The head is dropped and kicked out of frame. Finally a ticket…a ticket that reads ‘INVICTUS’ lands in Kingdom’s clutches.
Kingdom: That’s more like it. THIS (holds up ticket) is what everyone in the Rumble is going to be fighting for. A ticket to the main event of Invictus. An opportunity to fight for the World Championship. Every wrestler on the IWC roster anticipates a moment like this their whooooollle career. The chance to not only fight for the biggest belt in wrestling but do so on the biggest night in all of wrestling…INVICTUS. At Last Stand you’ll see athletes enter that ring every two minutes until there are five, ten, fifteen, hell, maybe even a hundred people battling it out all at once, all in the hopes of making it to the big time, the Invictus main event.
Kingdom lifts a finger to his lip and lowers his eyes from the camera.
Kingdom: Two weeks ago I kinda….well…I kiiiinda became another of those delusional bastards who entered their name into the Rumble. Yeeeeah, I know…I turned into a sheep. I jumped on the bandwagon. But don’t you worry. Because if there’s one thing I’ve never been, it’s just another face in the crowd. I’ll go from being one of the MANY in the Rumble, to being one of the FEW who can add Rumble winner to their resume.
We see Kingdom’s resume, a resume so big it had to be written on a scroll, one that keeps unrolling and unrolling and unrolling.
Kingdom: But I’m not the type of guy who just jumps in the deep end without floaties. (Rolls eyes) Okay, okay, so I’ve allllwwwways been THAT guy, but this time I want to be better acclimated to the Rumble environment before I just jump in there all willy-nilly. Plus, I’ll do you, the fans, a gigantic fan-service by showing you all what can be expected at the Rumble. So after having a cordial conversation with Karen McBride, I got the Boss to agree that we need a Johnny Kingdom Open Invitational Battle Royal to happen right here TONIGHT.
Drake: I already showed up with the friggin championship! What more does McBride want!!
One can almost see waves of heat emanating from the head of a red hot Desmond Drake. He clings and clings tight to the Queen of Wrestling Championship that so many are bound and determined to take from him. That’s not going to happen if he and his masked associate have their say in the matter. The pair remain defiant, even when security has them surrounded and pinned in the guerilla position.
Security: Our employer wants you to take that championship to the ring, right now.
Drake: HELL NO! I made that mistake two weeks ago, not happening again!
Security: You have no choice in the matter Mr. Drake.
Drake: I’m not risking Frosty McSnowTits stealing MY title.
Security: Just do as you’re told.
Two particularly beefy guards force Drake, his disguised ally and the Queen of Wrestling Title towards the squared circle. The rest of the security force stay behind, watching their co-workers carry out their employer’s will.
Chills run up spines at the sound of Lexy Chapel’s voice. With reluctance the security guards turn in the direction of the Evolution and Tag Team Champion, who looks to add Rumble winner to her list of accolades. As if her presence wasn’t intimidating enough she has a kendo stick extended from her hand, and a rather burly lad flanking her every step. The guards greet Lexy and her friend with clinched fists, ready to pick up where they left off with this Monarchy member two weeks earlier.
Lexy: Easy fellas. Monarchy are through getting our jollies beating up on you flabby, jelly-bellies.
The guards find it difficult to trust Lexy, considering she and Monarchy brutalized them on the last Riot.
Lexy: I’m just giving you a warning….(Lexy throws the kendo stick back to the ‘fan’ that shadows her and then starts to play the man-tits on one of the security guards like they were bongo drums)….I’ll slap more than just your tits around if you or any of your friends here get in my way later tonight. When I meet up with that meth-head, Kate, I had better not smell any of you anywhere near me. (Mockingly) The Champ…has got a receipt coming her way for what she did to me….
The kendo stick is back in Lexy’s hand and it’s squeezed tight.
The tracks of Victoria Salinas’ theme music are once again playing over the loud speakers and getting quite the ovation from the hundreds and hundreds amassed in the Manhattan Center. Although Victoria has already had a pretty productive night, Riot isn’t over for her yet. She’s still got some business to attend to, and that business is in ring action against Queen of Wrestling Champion Selena Frost.
Greyson: Earlier tonight Victoria Salinas revealed some unsettling truths about Tabitha Silverstone.
Frankie: Who does Victoria think she is sticking that huge nose of hers in other peoples’ business?
Sparkles: To be fair Frankie, Victoria was just looking out for her friends. Tabitha was abusing her role as agent to all but torture Marina Valdivia and Andre….
Frankie: Whatever-whatever-whatever. I….don’t….CAAAARE what Victoria’s motives are. She’s still a meddling biotch.
Greyson: Victoria isn’t out here to ‘meddle’ at the moment, she’s here for competition in the form of Queen of Wrestling Champion Selena Fr….
Frankie: Whoa-whoa-WHOA!!! TIME da fuck OUT. Selena is NOT the Queen of anything! Desmond Drake and that chick in leather have the belt and that makes them DA CHAMP.
Greyson: First of all, you’re an idiot. Secondly, two people cannot hold a singles title. Thirdly, you’re an idiot.
Although Victoria is slated to take on Selena the first thing that she targets is a microphone.
Victoria: I know-I know, you people want to see some action, and that’s just what I’m here to deliver. But first things first, I want Tabitha Silverstone to get her ass out here…
Greyson: Uh oh.
Sparkles: This ain’t gonna be pwetty.
Victoria: Come on Tabitha, you OWE Marina and Andre an explanation. They deserve some answers DAMMIT, and if you don’t get out here right now….
Drake: I hope the IWC buys tampax in bulk….
It isn’t Tabitha Silverstone that Victoria gets, it’s Desmond Drake. The pint sized man with an overinflated sense of self-worth marches on to the stage with the Queen of Wrestling Title over his shoulder. Stood at his side is the very same woman in leather and ski mask who aided in his theft of the very championship presently in his clutches.
Drake: Seriously, they should have a storage depot filled with nothing but tampons, cause their gonna need them with PMS running amok around this federation. Seems like all you women (points at Victoria in the ring) synchronize your visits from Aunt Flow. But guess what, while most men go running when they hear that Flow is coming to town, Uncie Desmond don’t go nowhere. Uncie Desmond don’t run from any bitch or her menstruation. In fact, I’m like a great big old grizzly bear drawn to the scent of blood.
Sparkles: Sparkles is drawn to the scent of cheese.
Greyson: Does Drake fully understand just how gross he sounds?
Frankie: Dessie D, the four foot fighter, the sawed-off superman, the half-pint hero…..
Greyson: Good God make him STOP!
Frankie:….he’s headed for the ring and looky looky what he’s got on the hooky….the Queen of Wrestling Title.
Sparkles: Is that Mary Allison Chainz with him tonight?
Greyson: I don’t think Chainz has recovered from the beating she got at the hands of Selena Frost two weeks ago. I’m guessing that Drake has found yet another protector willing enough to endure his personality.
Sparkles: That had to have been hard to come by.
Victoria poses a significant threat but neither Drake nor the mystery lady at his side are shying away from her. They enter the ring where Drake continues to repulse people the world…nay…the galaxy wide.
Drake: Listen up Icky-Vicky, McBride ordered my friend and I to come out here to the ring, which is just fine…just DANDY, cause we had something we wanted to say anyway….So why don’t you do what you do best and just stand in the background adding to the scenery?
Surprisingly Victoria keeps a cool head on her shoulders, crossing her arms and feigning interest in what Drake has to say.
Drake: Before we leave here tonight, hold back your tears cause I know you’ll miss me, I have a very special announcement to make. No-no, not that I’ve put my profile back on E-Harmony, I’m here to declare a NEW Queen of Wrestling Champion!
Greyson: Didn’t he try this two weeks ago?
Sparkles: Yeah, and it blew up right in his face.
Drake holds the Queen of Wrestling Title up to the woman with her face shrouded behind a ski-mask.
Drake: Two weeks ago I almost made the mistake of bestowing this title onto Mary Allison Chainz, a woman who CLEARLY did not deserve to be champion. But I’ll make it up to you, no not you fans, but to Silas Mason, the man who TRUSTED me with this title….
Greyson: Why can’t he just let us forget Silas Mason?
Frankie: I still have a small shrine built to our former Principle Owner. God how I miss those cage dancers he had shaking their asses on the stage.
Drake:…I will honor him tonight by awarding this championship to a woman who is clearly head and shoulders above EVERYONE on the IWC roster. A woman who happens to be very familiar with you, Icky Vicky…
Suddenly the masked lady lashes out, her fist ramming right upside Victoria’s face. The strike sends Salinas twisting along into the corner. Once her back is pressed to the turnbuckle Victoria finds her lungs almost collapsed by one boot after another after another.
Greyson: This masked woman…this masked woman attacking Victoria Salinas!
Frankie: She’s all over her like my tongue on a stripper’s asshole!
Greyson: Who the hell did Drake drag in off the street this time to ambush an IWC competitor?
The boots go on colliding upside Victoria’s ribs and now a fist is collapsing the bones in her cheeks. Suddenly the attacker backs off and gets a running start behind a spear aimed at an already banged up mid-section. Amazingly Victoria manages to side step her inbound assailant and send their face crashing into the corner. After ricocheting from the turnbuckle, the masked woman stumbles to the middle of the ring where Victoria is waiting for her. Instead of going for a kill move Victoria goes for something else, the mask that hides her attacker’s face. It isn’t long before that shroud is torn away and the face beneath is at last revealed.
Sparkles: That’s-that’s PRII FOOTE!
Sparkles: Prii Foote.
The shocked expression of Foote has finally come to view. She falls back on her seat pawing at her exposed cheeks and jaw. She’s not the only one who looks surprised, because Victoria is stood above her looking every bit as stunned by the unanticipated return of her former ally.
Greyson: Prii Foote, we haven’t seen her in over a year, ever since she severed ties with Victoria Salinas and the rest of the Slay Revolution.
Sparkles: What dumpster did Drake pull her out of?
It doesn’t take long for Victoria to get over her surprise and get back to her fury. She runs towards Prii with fists clinched, ready to unload on a now unmasked face. Desmond Drake does what he does best, complicate things. He jumps on Victoria’s leg and clings tight to it, refusing to let her get any closer to Prii. This distraction gives Drake’s associate just the opening she needs. She runs in, kicks Victoria to the gut and then drives her skull into the ring with an evenflow DDT. Prii quickly rolls away and towards the Queen of Wrestling Title, picking up the championship with designs of using the gold as a weapon. Drake is going to aid in that process, grabbing Victoria by the hair and yanking it with enough force to pull her up into position so that she can get cracked in the mug with the belt. The gold plate of the championship goes swinging along towards Victoria’s temple though it fails to connect when the tunes of Selena Frost’s theme start to play throughout the building and stops Prii COLD in her tracks.
Greyson: Oooooh hold the phone.
Sparkles: Selena Frost is coming, she’s coming for Drake, she’s coming for Prii, and she’s coming for the Queen of Wrestling Championship!
Greyson: HER Queen of Wrestling Championship.
Frankie: Get her Drake, sick her!
The only thing that Drake gets, is the hell out of the ring. He scrambles from the squared circle and totally abandons Prii Foote. Try as she may Prii cannot overcome the onslaught of the woman who just came sliding into the ring. The Snow Queen is FIRED up the moment she slips into the squared circle and comes face to face with the woman who blindsided her backstage in order to steal her championship. Prii tries to get the drop on Selena a second time only to have her fist blocked before it could ever nail her in the cheek. Selena blocks the jab and then hits one of her own, before following up with another jab, then another and another and another. Finally Selena leaves her feet in order to dropkick Prii off of her own. Prii rolls across the ring and then into the ropes where she desperately tries to stand up. The second she gets to her feet she’s removed from them when Victoria dashes in and clotheslines her across the throat. The blow sends Prii back flipping to the outside of the ring.
Greyson: Victoria and Selena clearing the ring, sending Drake and Prii Foote flying!
Sparkles: Prii better go back to lying face down in whatever gutter she was found in.
Prii doesn’t go to the gutter, she goes to something just as disgusting, Drake. She crawls right to his side and Drake immediately starts the arduous process of helping her back to her feet. As they dust themselves off the two show their anger over no longer having the Queen of Wrestling Title in their possession, but that’s not to say that the belt has ended up back in the clutches of its original owner. Unbeknownst to Selena Frost, the gold is now hanging from the hand of the woman she WAS scheduled to face tonight, Victoria Salinas.
Victoria stares down at the belt that is dangling from the strap it’s clasped by. Eventually her focus turns from the belt to the woman who is staring a whole right through her. Selena Frost does not like what she sees, HER championship in Victoria’s hand. Finally Victoria does the classy thing, holding the Queen of Wrestling Title out towards Selena. Not only does the Snow Queen grab her belt, but she grabs a microphone as well.
Selena: Listen Victoria, I know you’re banged up, and I’m pretty banged up too. But we both promised the believers (pauses for the crowd to chant ‘we believe’) a match tonight, and I don’t falsely advertise.
Victoria: Then we have at least one thing in common.
Selena: So now that we’ve gotten rid of Drake and whoever that is he dragged out here with him, how about the two of us give the believes what they came here tonight to see.
Victoria has no problem agreeing to those terms AT ALL.
SELENA FROST VS. VICTORIA SALINAS
Now that Desmond Drake and his latest hired goon have buggered off to the back the fans are free to put their focus on the squared circle. Although she was just reunited with her Queen of Wrestling Title, Selena is forced to relinquish it. She places the belt in the corner of the ring and then places her arms in Victoria’s clutches. Selena and Victoria Salinas find themselves in a collar elbow tie, jockeying for position. Almost immediately Selena swings around under Victoria’s arm and then places it around behind her back in a hammerlock. Selena quickly places an arm across her opponent’s throat, locking in a modified crossface chickenwing.
Greyson: The show must go on. Selena Frost and Victoria Salinas battling it out one on one in spite of their altercations with Desmond Drake.
Sparkles: Dessie D and his latest talent acquisition.
Frankie: Oh Sparkles only you could keep a straight face when calling Prii Foote a talent.
Sparkles: It’s easy, Sparkles’ expression never changes.
The crossface chickenwing combo continues to torque Victoria’s arm and now she finds some pressure applied to the crease of her knee. Victoria is brought down to her knees with her arm still being torqued and pressure being applied to her throat. The chickenwing is broken of Selena’s own accord, only because she plans to transition into another hold. She pulls back on her adversary’s arms and puts a boot between Victoria’s shoulder blades, applying a modified surfboard style stretch. Victoria is grounded….for now. She shows her incredible strength by yanking her arms forward and as a result sending Selena flipping over her head. Selena tucks into a forward roll once she hits the canvas, ending up straight back on her feet and hustling towards the ropes. She ricochets off and comes right back into a deep arm drag that flips her to her back. Victoria kneels beside Selena and applies the armbar submission hold.
This game of chess continues and now Selena assumes the roll of the Queen cornering the King. She kips up to her feet in spite of still being held in the armbar and then swings her leg around towards Victoria’s head, going for a roundhouse kick. Victoria ducks the blow and keeps hold of Selena’s wrist in the process. As a result Selena finds her own arm tucked back between her legs and it isn’t long before her other arm is latched onto. Victoria heaves Selena into a pumphandle transitioned into the Michinoku Driver.
Selena is spiked across the back of her head and Victoria is reaching out over the length of her opponent’s body in order to hook her leg.
The kick out that comes before the three leaves Victoria annoyed, but what’s even more agitating is the fact that her opponent is getting back to her feet. Victoria won’t let Selena stay upright for long, swooping in and pushing the Queen of Wrestling Champion backwards. The shove sends Selena flying into the ropes, ricocheting off them and then coming right back in at Victoria who is waiting to catch her adversary, catch her with the back drop. Right before Selena falls prey to this move, she stops dead in her tracks and launches her foot right upside Victoria’s face. The impact sends Victoria back peddling, not down, but back peddling. Selena is gonna finish the job of taking her opponent off her feet, dashing in with a clothesline. But Victoria has that scouted, she sees the arm barreling towards her throat and stoops out of its way. She catches Selena coming in with a gorilla press.
Greyson: Look at Victoria’s strength.
Sparkles: Sparkles looks at Victoria a lot, mostly backstage when she’s not aware.
Victoria heaves Selena into the air but she doesn’t get the chance to drive her down to the canvas. The resourceful Queen of Wrestling Champion slips from Victoria’s hands and then drops down behind her back. Selena reaches out and latches onto Victoria’s arm, already making preparations to apply the Frost Bite.
Greyson: Selena going for the same hold she made Mary Allison Chainz tap out to two weeks ago.
Sparkles: This hold has amassed a lot of victims lately.
It appears that Victoria will not be one of those victims. She manages to swing her body around with enough force to pluck her arm right out of Selena’s clutches and then turn to face her adversary’s exposed back. She latches onto Selena’s hips and hits her with a Bridging German suplex.
In spite of landing right on the back of her head Selena still gets her shoulder up and with plenty of time to spare. The moment that Selena kicks out of one pinning predicament she finds herself subjected to another. Her arm is caught and her opponent twists it around into a hammerlock before jumping into a modified Oklahoma Roll.
Selena rolls right out of the pin and in the same motion she fluidly swings around her opponent’s arm in order to lock in the Frost Bite.
Sparkles: How in the heck did that just happen?
Greyson: In the blink of an eye Selena locks in the Frost Bite.
Sparkles: But Sparkles didn’t blink, I can’t.
Frankie: I know a lot of cougars who have had so much plastic surgery they can’t blink either.
Greyson: You KNOW a lot of cougars?
Frankie: Okay, so I SCREWED a lot of cougars.
Within a second of finding herself locked in the hold Victoria is already debating rather she can fight through it or not. But the thought of submitting is not one that she holds onto. Amazingly she starts to squirm in the direction of the ropes until her toes hook the bottom strand and force the Frost Bite to be broken.
Greyson: Selena made just one mistake, applying that hold too close to the ropes.
Frankie: In matches as competitive as these mistakes are not something you can afford to make. Believe me, I know, I’m the foremost expert when it comes to all things wrasslin.
Greyson: Remind me Frankie, how long was you’re in ring career?
Frankie: Much longer and far more productive than your sex life.
The foot Victoria had wrapped around the rope may have saved her from the submission but it won’t keep her from being locked in it a second time. Already Selena is using her grip on Victoria’s wrist to tug on her arm and drag her whole body to the middle of the ring. The lightning fast Selena locks in the Frost Bite for a second….noooo….Victoria manages to clasp her hands together and prevents being trapped in the cross arm breaker. Pure raw strength is exhibited by Victoria as she starts to stand up even with her opponent’s legs wrapped around her arm.
Greyson: No….no way.
Victoria lets out a roar as she exerts pressure on every muscle in her body to use just one arm to lift her adversary up from the canvas. A stunned Selena finds herself heaved into the air while still wrapped around Victoria’s arm. But soon it’s Selena’s body that finds itself wrapped around Victoria’s knee. A back breaker connects that forces the Queen of Wrestling Champion to relinquish her hold on her opponent’s arm. Selena flips back and surprisingly lands on her feet, and once upright she struggles to keep her balance. Suddenly the very same knee that her spine just collided with now hits her smack in the face. Selena is pulled down into the code-breaker.
Victoria crawls into the cover.
And Selena gets her arm up to keep that cover from costing her a victory.
Victoria backs to the center of the ring and anticipates her adversary’s ascent to her feet. The second that Selena gets her legs under her here comes Victoria, flying in and locking on the Vainglorious Victory. The Christos Headscissors Armbar is about to be locked in….ABOUT TO….somehow Selena reverses by turning Victoria’s momentum against her and ultimately hitting a version of the Kryptonite Krunch. What makes this move all the more brutal is the fact that the back of Victoria’s head comes down right across Selena’s knee.
Greyson: Oi, OUCH, Salinas dropped RIGHT on the back of her head.
Sparkles: Looked like much of the damage was sustained to her neck.
Frankie: Actually, it looks like all the damage was inflicted on her face, but that was before this match ever happened.
Victoria’s neck is killing her but she refuses to show any ill-effects. All her strength is exerted to start on her way back to her feet where she’s instantly sent flipping to her back via the bridging fisherman suplex. Selena has Victoria on her back and the pin looks as if it’s about to net her another in a huge string of victories.
Victoria refuses to be another name added to the list of those vanquished by the Snow Queen. She kicks out and Selena rolls away from her adversary straight back to her feet. The Champion slaps her hand down onto her wrist several times, indicating that the Frost Bite is coming. Each time she taunts the hold the crowd chants ‘BELIEVE’ over and over again.
Sparkles: Frost is signaling that it’s time, it’s time for the Frost Bite.
Frankie: Viccy has managed to escape this hold a few times already but her luck, much like her looks, have run out.
Victoria absent mindedly struggles to avail herself of the canvas, desperately inching her way up to her feet. That’s when Selena strikes, latching onto her opponent’s arm then swinging around it. Here comes the cross-arm breaker, or at least it would be locked in if Victoria didn’t slip right out of her opponent’s clutches and counter, counter by flipping Selena over into the crucifix pin.
A the last possible moment Selena launches a shoulder off the ring
Greyson: Victoria an eyelash away from victory.
Although little remains in the tanks of either Selena or Victoria the two launch themselves to their feet and start to exchange forearm shivers. Eventually Selena manages to hook the crease of her arm around Victoria’s, blocking another of her attempted forearms. She then pushes back on that arm with enough force to send Victoria twisting around into a 180, her back turned to her opponent and that opponent immediately seizing the opportunity. Selena pulls Victoria down into the backslide.
Victoria gets her shoulder up, but it might be a move she regrets. The moment she drops over onto her knees she finds her arm caught in Selena’s clutches. Yet again it appears as if the Frost Bite is about to be locked in. Selena swinging her leg over her adversary’s bicep and sitting on top of it, her back to her opponent. Unfortunately she gets no further than that, because Victoria slips her arm out of Selena’s clutches, leaps to her feet and then grabs Selena by the arms. Before the Queen of Wrestling Champion can respond she’s being hit with the Siren Breaker!
Greyson: Selena never saw that Siren Breaker coming!
Sparkles: None of us did.
Frankie: And that move targeted the head that was struck with a steel pipe earlier tonight.
The Siren Breaker gets a CHILLING reaction from the crowd and the response to the ensuing cover gets an even bigger response.
The fans find their jaws careening towards the concrete at the sight of the pin being broken up at the very last second by Prii Foote. The leather clad Foote blindsides Victoria from behind with a well-placed kick right on the neck. Foote then starts to unleash a barrage of kicks upside Victoria’s head and across the body of a laid out Selena as well. Much like the official in the previous encounter, the ref presiding over this match is given no other choice, calling for the bell and ending this match on a double disqualification.
Greyson: Prii Foote and Desmond Drake are back AGAIN!
Sparkles: And their assaulting Selena and Victoria.
Greyson: The referee forced to throw out what was a fantastic encounter between both of these ladies.
It isn’t until both ladies are laid out in the ring by Foote that her benefactor Desmond Drake enters the fold. He slides into the squared circle and almost trips over his own feet as he excitedly hustles towards the Queen of Wrestling Championship belt. He plucks it up from the corner of the ring and then starts to smother the belt in kisses.
Sparkles: Why can’t someone just get these two out of here already?
Frankie: Because Drake is like a foreign dignitary, he has diplomatic immunity.
Greyson: He’s not the villain from Lethal Weapon 2.
No, he isn’t, but he might be just as villainous. Drake does nothing to endear himself to the audience now that he and Prii Foote are starting to make their exit from the ring with the stolen Queen of Wrestling Title in their possession. It’s when these two are at their highest that they find themselves crashing to new lows. Prii makes a fatal error in judgment, instead of vacating the ring she decides to go back after an already beaten down Victoria.
Greyson: Haven’t they done enough yet?
Apparently not because Prii is still getting her jollies stomping at Victoria’s neck, hoping to hear that sweet satisfying crack. Instead what she hears are Drake’s shouts coming from her side, the little man only egging on this beat down.
Drake: By the time Prii is done with you, men won’t even want to fuck you with a burlap sack over your head. (Whispering) You can still call me though.
Drake and Prii are so preoccupied with this assault that they don’t notice Selena Frost ascending to her feet. She squeezes the back of her neck which is still hurting after the Siren Breaker. Her face isn’t twisted by pain, it’s twisted by anger. She steps in behind Prii and drags her around by the shoulder into a jab across the cheek. Several jabs hurdle into Prii’s face with the last shot taking her almost right out of her boots.
Greyson: Selena back up and she’s unloading on Prii Foote.
The second that Drake sees Prii go down it provokes him to go running. He hightails it from the squared circle with the Queen of Wrestling Title hung from his hand.
Greyson: Drake running with the title.
Frankie: Kick those stubby little legs! KICK ‘EM!
Drake is doing just that, trying to channel the speed of Jessie Owens in order to get away from the squared circle with the title still in his grasp. He doesn’t get very far however, because Selena is right there behind him and her hands are latched onto his shoulders. Drake tries his best to get out of Selena’s clutches but it’s to no avail, his pint-sized body is being thrown back into the squared circle. He quickly tries to crawl and crawl as fast as he can out of the squared circle only to find his avenue of escape blocked…blocked by a recovered Victoria Salinas. He crawls along right into Victoria’s shins, which resemble the bars of a jail-cell, imprisoning Drake in the squared circle. His eyes slowly rise from the shins in front of him to the scowl that is staring down at him.
Greyson: You’re caught Drake, you’re trapped.
Sparkles: He’s stuck between Selena Frost and Victoria Salinas, the last place on earth a man like himself would want to be.
Greyson: Now look at this sniveling toad plead for his life.
Sweat streams down Drake’s face…wait…that’s NOT sweat…its tears. Drake is actually crying as he pleads for leniency. After everything that he’s done to Victoria and to Selena, there is going to be no mercy shown to him at all. Selena is already on the apron of the ring and is starting to slide back inside before she feels a disturbance in the force. The hairs on the back of her neck stand up, and it’s all because of the figure who has just come waltzing down the ramp. Selena’s eyes whip around and focus on the face of Monarchy member Trinity Street.
Sparkles: Trinity Street? What’s brought her out here?
Greyson: No one knows what this woman’s motives are.
Frankie: Maybe what she’s got in her hand there should clue you in.
The light gleams from the surface of the switchblade that extends from Trinity’s hand. The point of that blade is aimed at Selena, singling her out. Selena, no stranger to intimidation tactics and refusing to be a victim of them, jumps from the apron to the base of the ramp. She actually gestures for Trinity to come a little closer. However, Trinity doesn’t budge, she just goes on standing there on the ramp with the switchblade pointing at the Snow Queen. Meanwhile back in the ring Victoria is grabbing hold of Drake, though that grasp is short-lived. Prii Foote has recovered and is charging in to help Drake, only to realize she should have helped herself. Victoria sees Prii coming and leaps into the air, catching her with the code breaker. The double knee face buster sends Prii staggering back then falling through the ropes to the outside of the ring. The moment Prii falls at Selena’s feet the Queen of Wrestling Champion grabs her by the arm and starts to swing around it. She points at Trinity on the ramp then drops down and applies the cross-arm breaker on Prii. The hold is clamped on and clamped on tight, causing Prii to scream for mercy and tap out repeatedly.
Prii instantly regrets her allegiance to Drake, who uses her destruction to make his great escape. The Queen of Wrestling Title remains tightly coddled to his chest as he exits the squared circle. It takes a struggle but he manages to clear the barricade then hustle along through the fans.
Greyson: Prii Foote being dismantled with the Frost Bite while Drake runs away with her Queen of Wrestling Title.
Sparkles: Sparkles is still confused. Why did Trinity Street come out here and distract Selena Frost? What’s this all about?
Frankie: I guess Selena has even less fans than I thought.
Greyson: Selena has a rabid fan-base Frankie and…..
Harrison: Pardon the interruption.
The crowd has a difficult time staying focused with so much bombarding them simultaneously. Now it’s Aaron Harrison who commands their attention as he steps along to the stage. He still looks haggard after his NHB Title bout against Kat Kelly a few moments ago, but that’s not going to stop him from completing what’s brought him along to the IWC set.
Harrison: Earlier tonight I said there’d be a video to honor Ra….*BEEP*…but that’s not all it’ll do.
Frankie: What is Harrison out here babbling about?
Greyson: We saw him moments ago saying that he’d air a video that he personally put together.
Frankie: Yeah, but two weeks ago he was going off on the nerds in the production truck, warning them NOT to play a tribute to Rac….*BEEP*.
Greyson: Harrison has always been an enigmatic type of guy, very difficult to understand.
Harrison: All night long people have been wondering where Mya Denton is….
Sparkles: Sparkles did ask that question when we didn’t see her join Harrison at ringside for his match.
Harrison:…she IS here tonight and she WILL fight the World Champion, but that won’t happen until you’ve seen THIS!
A finger gestures to the Cartel-tron and all at once a video consumes the big screen.
EARLIER THIS WEEK
Harrison: I apologize for this….
A burlap sack is torn away from Mya Denton’s head, letting the light of day reach her batting eyes. It takes a moment for Mya to adjust to the sun, having gone several hours bombarded by nothing but imperceptible darkness. The first image she can make out is the outline of Aaron Harrison’s face mere inches removed from her own.
Harrison: I really am sorry for the secrecy.
Mya squints as the sunlight comes pouring in over Harrison’s shoulders and around the contours of his skull. He stops crouching in front of her and steps into her peripheral view, allowing her to see where she’s been dragged to. The location is revealed, much to Mya’s distress, as a graveyard.
Harrison: Did I bring you here?
He tries to soothe the unstable Mya by patting her on top of her head.
Harrison: My motives have never really been that great a mystery, have they?
Mya: Nah, you’ve been pretty transparent up until now. You want me to let ‘HER’ out.
Harrison: You’re right, well, at least partially. Not only do I want HER to be free, I want HER to take-over. I want you to grant that darkness inside of you freedom.
Mya: I’m not gonna let that happen….
Harrison: Why? Because you think Mya Denton has something to live for? That YOUR life has purpose? I’m sorry to tell you this (he puts his finger under Mya’s dipped chin and lifts) it doesn’t.
He steps away from Mya and towards a tombstone, casually leaning against it with his weight supported by his forearm.
Harrison: I mean your career is in the toilet. And your personal life, well, it’s not much better is it?
These facts are not easy to dispute.
Harrison: But all of that can change. You can have the career and the life you’ve always wanted. You can be respected, you can be….feared. You can be the envy of everyone in the crowd and the nightmare of everyone on the roster. All it takes is becoming what Rac…*BEEP*….wants you to become.
He nears Mya, crouching towards the woman who has been knelt on the dirt this entire time.
Harrison: You have to realize something, Mya Denton is NOT who you are, not really. Mya Denton is nothing but a cocoon. It’s protecting the beautiful creature during its metamorphosis. Well that transformation is complete, and now it’s time…time to let HER out.
For weeks Mya has been resistant to Harrison’s manipulative tactics, but that resistance has been chipped and chipped and chipped away at until finally being totally eroded.
Harrison: There’s only one thing you have to do….
A shovel is taken out from behind the tombstone that Harrison had been leaning against. Soon it finds its way to the ground, landing at Mya’s knees.
Harrison: You have to BURY Mya Denton.
There is an empty grave several feet away and at the head of this pit is a tombstone that reads ‘Mya Denton.’ In almost a trance like state Mya moves towards the grave with shovel across her hands. Eventually she ends up at the edge of the hole, and much to her shock said hole is not empty. Laying at the base of the pit is a body, the body of Mya Denton. She looks up to the other side of the grave where Harrison is kneeling and holding a handful of dirt.
Harrison: Give her what she NEEDS.
The dirt in his palm spills into the pit.
It’s been a tumultuous evening thus far and try as she may Karen McBride is finding it painstakingly difficult to keep everything under control. The Principle Owner is presently stood in the corridor of the arena giving orders to a crew member. All the while Karen’s younger sister Melanie stands in the background playing something on her cellphone.
Karen: Was I not clear with my orders?
Crew Member: I’m sorry Mrs. McBride, but….
Karen: Because I seem to remember telling you guys NOT to play Aaron Harrison’s footage until I had a chance to watch it and I signed off on it.
Crew Member: Again, I apologize…
This time Karen allows the youthful and pretty stagehand to give a proper explanation.
Crew Member: Harrison was threatening us though. He almost choked one of your workers to death, so when he stormed into the production truck and warned us what would happen if we didn’t play his video I….
Karen: (Sighs) I…I understand.
Crew Member: And he said that when we followed through he’d produce Mya Denton IMMEDIATELY. Honestly, we thought we were helping seeing as Mya is in a marquee match against your World Champion.
Karen: I could care less what match Mya is supposed to be in. I’m only worried about her safety.
Crew Member: Then you should be worried about OUR safety as well.
Karen: I am. Which is why I’m not going to reprimand you or your crew for going against my orders…THIS TIME. I’ll strengthen security around the production truck to prevent this from happening again…and it WON’T happen again. Is that understood?
Crew Member: Yes ma’am.
The pretty blond turns to walk away only to smack right into an enormous stomach. She almost ricochets like a pebble from the grill of a semi-truck, and that semi-truck is Miss Jon. The beast stares down McBride and the crew-member, who at that point realizes that Aaron Harrison was not her primary threat. Though in that moment the gargantuan Miss Jon doesn’t look NEARLY as imposing as she normally would, considering that she has a giant pink stuffed bunny griped in her hands.
Announces Miss Jon’s agent, Martin Howe III as he steps out from behind his client with a bottle of Scotch extended across his palms.
Howe: (Talking to the Crew-Member) My client Miss Jon….pardons you.
Oh how grateful the Crew-Member is to hear that. It’s like she just received a call from the governor right before the electric chair could be switched on. She moves as fast as her long slender legs will carry her, stepping out from between Miss Jon and Mrs. McBride.
Howe: Miss Jon and I wanted to apologize to you if we came off a bit TOO presumptuous earlier tonight.
The expensive bottle of Scotch is extended towards Karen, who looks reluctant to accept it.
Karen: What’s this?
Howe: Just a small token of our appreciation for all your patience and understanding.
Karen: (Smiling insincerely) Thanks, but I don’t accept bribes.
Howe: Bribes (guffawing), BRIBES? Don’t think so little of us, Mrs. McBride. These gifts are intended as nothing more than an olive branch and to demonstrate to you that my client is totally genuine in her attempts to repair her image.
Miss Jon: Bunny….
The adorable pink bunny rabbit is held out to McBride, extended from the balled up fists of the dangerous Miss Jon.
Miss Jon:….Pretty-pretty bunny.
The head on the bunny is given a gentle caress by the not so gentle giant. All the while the muscles in Miss Jon’s face are twitching as they struggle to form a grin.
Karen: Uhhhh, I appreciate the offer….
Howe: Even this (gestures to the gifts) doesn’t convince you of our sincerity? Fine. Then we’ll just have to step up our efforts.
Karen: I’m not sure that’s a good idea. Maybe you two should…
Howe: You think Miss Jon is still a monster, right? Well would a monster do to your World Champion what we’re about to do?
Karen: Hold on-hold on-hold on!
Miss Jon and Howe walk away, and do so empty handed, forcing the bottle of scotch and the bunny into Karen’s clutches before they can leave.
A vending machine is smacked and kicked, Destiny Nichols going homicidal on it.
Destiny: Give me my damned M&Ms you bastard!!
The side of her fist slams against the plastic display that teases her with the image of a bag of M&Ms stuck on the tip of a hook that refuses to let go and let her have it.
Destiny: You son of a bitch!
Katelyn Buehler’s good friend swipes her boot into the machine once again, but those damned M&Ms aren’t dropping.
Finally Destiny turns away from the vindictive vending machine to the conflicted champion. Katelyn Buehler swoops in and takes her trusted confidante by the shoulder, using this grip to drag her away.
Katelyn: We have to talk.
If Destiny thought a machine refusing to dispense a bag of M&Ms was her biggest concern, she was wrong.
Trinity: I have my….reservations.
Trinity Street has never been the type to shy away from what’s on her mind, and at the moment, its concern. Although her fellow Monarchy stalwart Taylor Chase has always respected the opinion of the legendary Trinity it appears that not even she can dissuade her present course of action. Regardless of whatever advice may be dispensed, Tay is not adhering to it, she’s got her mind made up as she moves down the hall.
Taylor: I get that, really, I do, but I know what I’m doing.
Trinity: Your sister is not the most trustworthy sort.
Taylor: Yeah, true story, but she IS a means to an end.
The two stop just outside of a door, Tay turning her back to it in order to make a parting comment to Trinity.
Trinity: Have you thought this through?
Taylor: Of course! I’m Taylor BY GAHD Chase! And when I promise a ‘family reunion,’ I deliver. (Glancing back over her shoulder) Just so happens we might have a bonding moment a little sooner than we anticipated.
Tay reaches behind her, opens the door and reveals those who were seated in the room. There in the dimly lit chamber are Mika Kozlov and Borislav, two dastardly individuals who suspiciously go as quiet as church mice the moment they see Tay. The door closes once Taylor has stepped through it, leaving a worried Trinity in the hall.
Right before the commercial break we saw Aaron Harrison reveal some particularly ‘odd’ video footage. Now cameras have returned to the ring where something even stranger is about to go down, and once again Harrison is at the epi-center of it all. He’s stood in the squared circle gesturing to the backstage area.
Sparkles: How much Aaron Harrison can we cram into one night?
Greyson: His fingerprints have been all over this telecast.
Frankie: Just like my fingerprints can be found all over a hooker’s ass-cheeks.
Greyson: Well Harrison made a compromise. He said that he would reveal where Mya Denton is IF the IWC let him play that footage of her burying….herself?
Frankie: The less we discuss that the less I feel the need to pop Resperidone.
Greyson: Mya is scheduled to face the World Champion coming up here next, so I hope Harrison sticks to his word.
Sparkles: It looks like he’s calling someone out from the back, and hopefully that someone will be Mya.
Finally the lyrics of “Shatter Me” play over the speakers indicating that Mya Denton is INDEED the person that Harrison is summoning. The entrance curtains open and a rather reluctant Mya comes walking through them. Her eyes are cast to the floor and the baggage under them are far more pronounced. She doesn’t even look up into the face of Harrison once she’s slid into the ring and has ended up at his feet.
Greyson: For weeks Harrison has been trying to TRANSFORM Mya Denton….
Frankie: Then just take her to a plastic surgeon and let them stitch on a penis. Problem solved.
Greyson: That’s NOT the type of transformation that I’m talking about.
Sparkles: Mya’s past problems with multiple personality syndrome have been well documented, and it seems that Harrison wants her to let one of those darker personas take control over her completely.
Frankie: She’s gonna need to do something if she wants to beat the World Champ tonight.
Greyson: Maybe burying herself was the final step in Mya’s metamorphosis.
KATELYN BUEHLER VS. MYA DENTON
The tracks of “Satisfied” playing through the PA system result in a reaction that has to be heard to believe. Absolutely everyone in the Manhattan Center has just lunged to their feet and are letting out a lung bursting reaction as the World Champion comes walking on out to the stage. Although her arm and her ankle have been targeted remorselessly over the past few weeks she shows no ill-effects of her pre-existing injuries. Katelyn stands tall and shows off the championship that is raised high overhead.
Greyson: What a response for our World Champion.
Frankie: Make it stop….good God make it STOP! My ears are gonna start bleeding.
Greyson: Katelyn Buehler looks to be in great shape and in good spirits heading into what presumably will be her greatest challenge since becoming Champ at Last Stand.
Sparkles: In two weeks she defends the title against longtime nemesis Taylor Chase and the absolutely deadly Mika Kozlov.
Greyson: It’s not like she’s facing a slouch tonight though. Mya Denton has taken on a number of top tier talents here in the IWC and taken them to their absolute limit. She just needs one big win to get her on the right path
Sparkles: But Buehler is in need of a big win here as well, she’s got to have momentum going into that big triple threat World Title defense.
Once inside of the squared circle the World Champion hesitantly gives her belt to the referee and signifies that she’s as ready as she’ll ever be. While Katelyn appears prepared, Mya Denton doesn’t. She’s crouching in the corner of the ring with hands on her knees and her eyes aimed to the canvas. She won’t even look up when the bell rings to commence this all important contest. Rather she’s prepared or not Mya is being called out to the middle of the ring by the fired up champion. Katelyn gestures for Mya to bring it and although reluctant that’s just what Mya does. The two lock up in a collar elbow, which might be the closest thing we get to actual technical wrestling in this contest. Immediately Katelyn breaks out of the collar elbow and swings her fist right upside Mya’s cheek. Another punch then nails Denton, followed by a third.
Greyson: Katelyn a little more revved up and vicious than I thought she’d be coming into this match.
Sparkles: She’s on Mya like a cat on nip.
The punches stop only because Katelyn is using her elbow. The point of it collides with Mya’s chin and the shot sends her stumbling along into the cables. Katelyn grabs hold of Mya’s wrist and sends her flying along into the far ropes. When Mya rebounds from the cables she comes back in at Buehler, who sets to back drop her adversary. Right before Mya can fall prey to the back drop she stops her forward momentum and nails a kick right to Katelyn’s chin. The Champion stumbles back and puts just enough distance between herself and her adversary for Mya to leap into a clothesline. Mya dashes in for the lariat though it’s a Lou Thez Press that actually connects. A stunned Mya is caught by the Champion and driven to the canvas, Katelyn landing on top with her fists landing across either of her adversary’s temples.
Greyson: I’m really surprised to see Katelyn so intense in this match considering that she and Mya are pretty good friends outside the ring.
Sparkles: She’s on Mya like Sparkles on cheese.
Frankie: Are you gonna keep doing that?
Frankie: Then can you TRY to be clever with it?
Sparkles: Probably not.
Katelyn’s keeps jabbing and jabbing away at Mya’s face before she breaks off in order to run into the ropes, ricochet off then return to her adversary with a leg drop across her throat. Katelyn gets back to her feet and then takes off into the ropes before hitting a second leg drop on her opponent. The aggressive Champion peels Mya’s body off the ring and then into a snap scoop slam. Mya hits the ring with such force that it causes her to instantly pop up to her seat, hands reaching for her back. It’s not her hands that get to her kidneys though, it’s her opponent’s boot. Katelyn hits a running soccer kick right into her adversary’s lower back.
The kick wasn’t the least of Mya’s worries, because now she finds the champion’s forearm smacking her in the back of the neck. She then takes Mya around the jaw and uses it to drag her along to her feet before applying a double underhook. Katelyn hits a knee to Mya’s exposed face, followed by another, and then another before finally snapping back into a bridging double underhook suplex.
Mya barely has the strength to get her shoulder off the ring in time to stave off defeat. At ringside one can see the frown on Aaron Harrison’s face. The performance he’s seeing out of Mya is definitely leaving something to be desired.
Harrison: GET UP!
He shouts while slapping the ring apron. Inside of the ring Mya is trying to live up to Harrison’s expectations, forcing herself up from the canvas and into her opponent’s waiting arms. Katelyn latches on a side headlock but before she can parlay this hold into a move she finds her opposition pulling her along into the ropes. Mya uses the bounce from the ropes to push Katelyn off and send her rushing into the far cables. Katelyn comes back in at Mya…or more accurately into Mya’s arm. A clothesline NEARLY hits the Champion, only to have her duck and keep on running. She hits the ropes behind Mya and then comes racing back towards her unsuspecting adversary. At the last second Mya turns and leaps into the air, catching Katelyn with the hurricarana into the pin.
Before Mya can score an upset her pin attempt has been kicked out of. Katelyn sits up and sends Mya rolling over backwards onto her shoulders. Instead of going for another pin Katelyn leaps to her feet and latches onto the creases of her adversary’s knees, catapulting her into the corner. Just before she smacks into the turnbuckle Mya extends her hands and legs, latching onto the ropes instead of hitting them. She hustles to the top of the turnbuckle then comes lunging off, twisting in mid-air then hitting a crossbody. The World Champion is driven to the canvas with Mya landing on top and into the cover.
Once again Katelyn gets her shoulder up in time to prevent a loss.
Greyson: See what I mean. Mya isn’t a slouch. She’s given numerous talents a definite run for their money….
Sparkles: Which might just bankrupt Buehler here tonight.
Mya drags her opponent along to her knees and then swings some fists upside her temple. She applies a side headlock and goes for a springboard bulldog. Katelyn is dragged along towards the ropes that Mya is now leaping into, but before she can push off, she’s pushed OVER. Mya is sent flying over the top cable but transitioning in mid-air so that instead of flying to the outside mats, she flies to the apron. Mya now attempts to spring to the top cable and go soaring into the squared circle. A thrust kick changes all those plans. Katelyn’s boot smacks Mya right in the jaw and sends her crashing not into the ring as she intended, but into the floor mats. A banged up Mya is back on her feet at ringside for only a moment before she finds herself on the receiving end of a scoop slam. The World Champion turns away from her adversary in order to scream at the fans.
Katelyn: WHO’S HOUSE IS THIS!?!
The fans respond with an emphatic ‘YOU’RE HOUSE.’
Katelyn turns from the ever supportive fans to her damn near debilitated adversary. A beleaguered Mya is plucked from the ground and loaded into another scoop slam. Before her body is flung into the ground Mya slips from her opponent’s clutches and lands behind her back. A surprised Buehler is caught around the neck and dragged towards the barricade. Mya pushes off the barrier, twists in mid-air and NAILS the springboard bulldog, driving Katelyn’s face into the thin floor matting.
Frankie: Maybe that move just put some color in Katelyn’s face, black and blue…HAHAHAHA-YAAAH-HAHAHA!
Greyson: You know, laughing at your own jokes is sooo lame.
Frankie: So is your mother.
Greyson: That was even lamer.
Katelyn’s crash into the mats has left her pawing at her face, but that’s not sufficient to block the knee that Mya cracks her upside the cheek with. Mya throws Katelyn back into the ring then follows her in quickly before dropping into the cover.
The Champion struggles but ultimately gets her arm up.
Harrison goes on watching from ringside with strong disapproval, even as Mya gets even more aggressive. She applies a half nelson on Katelyn then subjects her face to one knee lift after another after another after another. The longer this match goes on the more intensity Mya is showing. Her knee almost breaks Katelyn’s nose and now the canvas might finish the job. Mya drags Katelyn down into a half nelson face buster. After dishing out one traumatic blow Mya goes for another. She rolls Katelyn to her feet, traps her in a front chancery and then runs at the turnbuckle, pushing off it into a tornado DDT. The top of Katelyn’s head sustains quite a bit of trauma and leaves her splayed across the ring…for a very short time. Mya keeps the front chancery locked in, rolls to her side, pulls Katelyn along with her and then takes off towards another corner. ANOTHER tornado DDT spikes Katelyn on top of her head, though Mya doesn’t stop there. The front chancery is still locked in and the Champion finds herself being pulled towards a third turnbuckle then into a third tornado DDT. If you thought three DDTS were bad…well…Mya isn’t through unleashing them just yet. Once again she drags Katelyn along into a fourth corner and pushes off into a fourth, devastating tornado DDT.
Greyson: Katelyn can’t withstand being dropped on her head this many times!
Sparkles: Four tornado DDTs AFTER that bulldog outside of the ring.
Frankie: Katelyn’s not gonna be in very good shape headed into that title match at Last Stand.
Sparkles: Not at this rate she isn’t.
Mya finally makes the lateral press.
Harrison’s face cracks with a smile but that grins vanishes the moment he sees that Katelyn has kicked out of Mya’s pin. A banged up Mya drags Katelyn up from the canvas and this time it’s not a tornado DDT she’s about to unleash, it’s the Shiranui. She starts to run towards the ropes to deliver her finishing move the Cra-Cra. That isn’t going to happen, Katelyn’s forearm to her opponent’s kidneys prevents a grizzly fate. Mya breaks the three quarters head-lock and then finds something else broken, her face. Katelyn puts her hands to Mya’s back and shoves her along into the ropes looking to catch her adversary on the rebound with the KTFO. Katelyn swings around into the roaring elbow only to have Mya duck down and narrowly avoid the collision.
Mya keeps on running right past Katelyn and into the ropes behind her back. The moment that Katelyn turns around she spots Mya springing off the middle cable and going for a back elbow. She hits the move and the impact sends Katelyn staggering along into the corner. Katelyn turns around and falls chest first against the turnbuckle, leaning on it for support. She starts to push away from the corner but instead what she pushes herself into is the waiting arms of her opponent. Mya catches Katelyn around the neck and then steps up the corner, flipping back into the Cra-Cra.
Greyson: Mya going for one more blow to Katelyn’s head.
Sparkles: The final blow.
Frankie: Katelyn doesn’t use her brain anyways, so it won’t be that great a loss once their knocked out of her head.
Katelyn’s brains stay exactly where they are. Just as Mya flips back into the Shiranui Katelyn manages to reach out and grab the top rope, holding onto it tightly and preventing being driven into the canvas across the back of her skull. But she DOES get pulled down to that canvas eventually. The moment Mya lands on the canvas after missing the Cra-Cra, she reaches out and latches onto Katelyn’s hips, dragging her over into a roll up.
Katelyn may have been folded up under Mya with her opponent sitting on the back of her thighs but still the Champion is able to kick out. She sends Mya flying off the pin and towards the ropes, which she bounces right off of. Mya uses that momentum to carry her back towards Katelyn and into a clothesline that just barely grazes her target’s head. With what little speed Katelyn can muster she manages to duck the lariat aimed for her head and then catch her opponent with a thrust kick to the back of the skull. The blow sends the front of Mya’s head flying into the face of the referee. The official pays for being this close to the action when his mug is destroyed by the headbutt from Mya.
Greyson: Eeesh….a kick right on the back of the brainpan!
Frankie: Take what I said earlier about Katelyn not needing a brain and apply it to Mya Denton in this circumstance.
Greyson: The ref got cracked in the mug as well.
Frankie: Serves him right. He shouldn’t officiate if his head is gonna be that huge.
A banged up Buehler shakes off everything that Mya has hit her, but the referee doesn’t have the same luxury. His recuperative capabilities are not on pair with the World Champion’s, he’s not budging from the ring. Mya did budge from that ring, in the sense that she rolled out of it, spilling at the feet of Harrison at ringside. He tries to encourage her to get back up, though his words aren’t that inspirational.
Greyson: Katelyn’s got Mya down and she’s closing on a potential win.
Sparkles: A victory that will definitely help her coast into the main event of Last Stand with her head held just a little bit higher.
Frankie: It’s not her ego that needs stroking, it’s my penis.
Sparkles: *Ugh* Sparkles will get the lubricant.
Frankie: No-no-no. Let’s just get back to Buehler.
The crowd unanimously erupts with an oh so orgasmic ovation at the sight of the Champ verging on a victory. Katelyn starts towards the ropes that separate her from Mya and is about to flip over them but instead she flips out at the sight presently on the stage. Her eyes have turned to the ringside area where Ryan Watson, Lexy Chapel and Lexy’s ‘fan’ are standing. A kendo stick sways at Lexy’s side, the very same weapon that Katelyn assaulted her with two weeks earlier. There’s another item held in Watson’s hand, a bullhorn, the very same item he used to antagonize Katelyn Buehler back at the End of the Year Special.
Greyson: There went that feel good vibe.
Frankie: Seriously? I just went from six to midnight guys. Cause there’s Lexy Chapel, meaning Monarchy is representing!
Greyson: Why is she out here?
Sparkles: Lexy no stranger to the World Champion, and neither is Ryan Watson, he’s had a few run-ins with Buehler since his debut back at Upping the Ante.
The kendo stick in Lexy’s hand is pointed towards Buehler, sufficiently drawing her attention and her ire. Katelyn may be in the middle of a match with Mya but she’ll take on a few more opponents if it means the chance to get her hands on members of Monarchy. She takes one look at the unconscious Mya at ringside and then at the unconscious referee in the ring and then at a few individuals she’d like to leave unconscious.
Katelyn: Alright Lexy, I know what this is about….
Nothing Katelyn is saying or about to say is stopping Watson, nor Lexy nor her fan, the three already climbing up onto the apron.
Katelyn: You’ve come out to this ring THINKING you’ll get revenge for what I ‘apparently’ did to you two weeks ago. But if you do get in here, whatever I did to you on the last Riot will be nothing compared to what I do to you right now.
Lexy, Watson and the associate hesitate for a moment, staring at the fists that Katelyn has clinched at her sides. The World Champion continues to be the type who will never shy away from a confrontation, even when the odds are insurmountable. And they don’t get any more insurmountable than what opposes her at that moment. What Katelyn doesn’t realize is that it’s not just Lexy, it’s not just Watson, it’s not just this Monarchy loyalist at their sides that are opposing her, because there are two more individuals out for her blood. Mika Kozlov and Taylor Chase, the pair set to oppose Katelyn for her title at the next pay-per-view, have just slid into the ring and have pounced on the champion from behind.
Greyson: Mika!?! Taylor!?! Together!?!
Sparkles: Mika Kozlov and Taylor Chase just got the drop on Katelyn.
Frankie: What a wonderful family bonding moment for these sisters reunited.
Tay and Mika don’t stop at driving Katelyn down to the ring, that was just the precursor for what the two have planned for their victim. Kate is trying to stand up only to have Tay run in at her side and crack her in the temple with a knee strike, a blow made all the more devastating given the steel under Tay’s leg. Although Kate is knocked unconscious by the shot she is still on her feet, absent mindedly turning from the knee that just smashed the bones in her face to the arms waiting to do even more damage to her skull. Mika catches Katelyn around the neck, bridges her back then licks her victim’s forehead before ultimately hitting a version of the Sister Abigail. The Killing Joke results in Katelyn’s face being crushed against the canvas.
Greyson: Mika and Tay are just dismantling Buehler two weeks before Last Stand.
Sparkles: We’re getting a preview of what these two are going to do to New Eden inside of the Cage tonight and what they’re going to do to Buehler at the pay-per-view.
Frankie: Come off it Sparkles, once Monarchy and Mika are threw with Katelyn, she’s not going to make it to Last Stand.
Lexy, Ryan and their supporter finally enter the ring and get a closer view of Katelyn’s destruction. Lexy actually pitches in when Tay and Mika lead the Champion to her feet and expose her ribs to a crushing blow from a kendo stick. All of Lexy’s strength is used to crack the Champion’s mid-section. Buehler doubles over her banged up guts and now the back of her head is just as brutalized. Watson slams the bullhorn he carried out to smack Katelyn across the base of her neck.
Greyson: Please stop this already!
Frankie: They’re just getting this party started.
Katelyn, unfortunately, is the dishonored guest of said party. Her body has never suffered the type of beating it’s getting right now, subjected to an even stiffer strike from the kendo stick in Lexy’s hands. She tries to roll away from the stick but now finds herself on the receiving end of a chair shot. Mika rolled out of the ring only to return to it with a chair in hand. That weapon finds its way down right across the back of Katelyn’s shoulder, targeting a pre-existing arm injury that Buehler ALMOST fully recovered from. The chair is now opened and Katelyn’s arm is slid into it.
Greyson: Don’t you do it!
Mika’s not going to be talked out of her deadly plans by a commentator or by the pleas of the crowd. She leaps off the middle rope of a turnbuckle and stomps the chair that was wrapped around Katelyn’s arm. The bones in her limb can almost be heard crunching over Katelyn’s screams. Her groans of agony only get worse when Tay drops down behind her and locks Katelyn’s arms in the TTYL, the very same submission that previously injured the champion.
Frankie: So much for Katelyn’s miraculous recovery.
Greyson: Monarchy and Mika aren’t going to stop….someone has to get out here and….
Just when it seems that Tay is going to pop Katelyn’s arm out of its socket with her version of the Rings of Saturn the crowd goes from begging to cheering. The tracks of Miss Jon’s entrance music have just started playing throughout the PA system and it isn’t long before the train sized woman derails Monarchy’s plans. Her huge body is stomping down the ramp with her agent Martin Howe III walking right along behind her.
Greyson: Now it’s Miss Jon?
Sparkles: This can either be real good or real bad for Katelyn, she’s had issues with Miss Jon for several weeks now.
The planetary mass of raw rage steps over the ropes and into the ring. The second Miss Jon squares up on Monarchy they all go running from the squared circle. Mika is the last person to exit, taking a second to wink in Miss Jon’s direction before she finally vacates the ring. Once she’s sent everyone packing, save for the World Champion, Miss Jon turns in circles to make sure no one dares try to get back inside. To the surprise of everyone in the arena this beast is actually PROTECTING rather than annihilating the battered World Champion.
Greyson: Did-did-did Miss Jon actually just save Katelyn?
Sparkles: This defies belief.
Greyson: Has Miss Jon truly turned a corner?
Miss Jon isn’t through yet, and she won’t be until someone’s blood is on her knuckles. She rolls out of the ring and stomps towards the back, deadest on sending a few bodies to the local mortuary. Although Miss Jon might have protected Katelyn from Monarchy and Mika, she does not protect her from a pinfall. Her opponent in the match that is STILL going, is now being thrown back into the ring. Mya Denton is tossed under the ropes by Aaron Harrison, who then shouts at her to make the cover. A moment of reluctance is shown by Mya, but ultimately she resolves herself to what she has to do. She crawls in and hooks Katelyn’s leg.
Greyson: Don’t do this Mya….Have some self-respect.
Frankie: If it helps, I respect Mya more now than ever.
The referee starts to come through, conveniently after Katelyn had already been brutalized by Mika Kozlov and all of Monarchy. He makes the count and Mya keeps the champion’s legs hooked about as high and tight as she possibly can.
Greyson: This is shit stacked five-foot-nine.
After the barbarism that was inflicted on Buehler there was no chance that she would kick out of this pinfall. Mya scores the win and does so to the disgust of a world-wide audience. She does not bask in the allure of victory, lord knows she wants to but Harrison isn’t letting that happen. He rolls into the ring and grabs Mya by the shoulder, demanding her attention.
Harrison: Now finish her off!
Katelyn is already in anguish but that’s not good enough, not for Harrison. Mya on the other hand is content to leave the ring with a victory, not with her opponent’s destruction.
Harrison: It’s what SHE would want?
Mya listens to Harrison but this time she does not follow his edict. Instead of swooping in and finishing Katelyn off, Mya vacates the squared circle. This does not please Harrison, not….one…..bit.
Although there’s a neck-brace constricting his throat nothing is going to keep Flash Silver from speaking. He seems to be barking warnings at a number of other ‘talents’ who are gathered in the locker-room. Nobody takes his threats seriously, but Flash goes on making his warnings nevertheless.
Flash: I’m gonna tell you guys this once and only ONCE. So pass it on to everybody else, your brothers, your sisters, your mothers….
It doesn’t matter how verbose he might be nothing can sway the rest of the roster to give him the time of day, they just keep sitting there in chairs applying their wrestling gear. Flash’s back is to the camera, which is a good thing considering that the fans don’t have to see Flash’s obnoxious expression.
Flash:…Tonight Flash Silver is entering the Johnny Kingdom Open Invitational Battle Royal, and with the power of patriotism running through my red, white and blue veins I will be VICTORIOUS! So don’t you filthy terror mongers even think about venturing out of your caves, because if you do so help me I’ll give you thirteen stripes…no thirteen STRIKES across the face, and then you’ll be seeing fifty stars floating around your heads…
Finally the wrestlers Flash was warning start to take notice, and it’s not of his threats. Their nostrils flare, as if they just stood down wind of a horrid stench. Their eyes rise towards the source of this obscene odor and once they see who is standing behind Flash, they instantly recoil in fear. One can almost see the dust trail left behind the bodies of the roster members as they barrel out of the locker-room.
Flash: Go and spread the message you cowards. Let the world know that Flash Silver is coming….
It isn’t the threats made by Flash that sent the wrestlers in the locker-room running, it’s the figures who just stepped up behind him. Flash is blissfully unaware that a feces covered Teiji Shintaro is stood mere inches from his spine. As Teiji stares his potential victim down he licks the blood that is oozing from his gums and drenching his teeth.
O’Flaherty: Excuse me….
Flash lets out a loud squeal and almost jumps out of his underpants. He swings around wide eyed towards Teiji, and to the two men on either side of the Japanese Nightmare. Eric O’Flaherty, baseball bat in one hand and silver flask in the other stands at Teiji’s right, while Ricky Holt, shades over his eyes and teeth chomping gum stands at Teiji’s left.
O’Flaherty: Did we hear something about a battle royal…an OPEN INVITATINAL battle royal?
It would appear Flash has been stricken mute by fear, vividly recalling what Teiji and Holt did to him two weeks ago. All he can do is stare with wide eyed horror at the blood that collects across Teiji’s teeth.
Holt: What did we tell you about eyeballing Teiji?
Flash eyes can’t veer towards the floor fast enough.
The show veers to another backstage area where IWC grappler Marina Valdivia is getting herself psychologically ready for a fight, and not just any fight, but a Manhattan Street Fight. Something that promises oodles of violence, oodles of chaos, and maybe even a few oodles of blood. Marina’s mind is finally starting to wrap around what she’s in store for when she goes one on one with Monarchy’s Orlando Cruze. She wants nothing more than to go on with her quiet introspection as she paces the floor of the locker-room, though solitude ain’t something she’s about to get.
Never before has anyone seen someone’s heart sink as fast as Marina’s just did. One can almost hear it splash against the acids in her stomach. That very same bile seems to be rising, Marina feeling the need to regurgitate the very moment she sees Tabitha Silverstone, her estranged, and emphasis on the STRANGE part, agent invading the sanctity of the locker-room. Nervously Tabitha nears Marina, refusing to accept that her client wants to be nowhere in her vicinity.
Tabitha: I was hoping that we could….
A hand goes up and that hand stops just an inch away from Tabitha’s face.
Marina: Save your breath.
Tabitha: I’m just asking for one second…one second to explain everything.
Marina: It’s gonna take you a whhooooole lot longer than one second.
Tabitha: Not really. Because there’s a real-real simple explanation.
Marina’s waiting. She’s got her arms crossed, her head titled and everything.
Tabitha: Victoria is framing me. SHE’S responsible for everything.
Much like Andre Jordan earlier in the night Marina can’t seem to accept just how far ‘her friend’ Tabitha Silverstone has gone off the rails.
Marina: That’s about all I’ll hear of that.
Marina can’t get to the door fast enough.
Tabitha: Why can’t you see it, she’s-she’s-she’s BRAINWASHING YOU!! She’s turning you and Dre against me!
Marina keeps walking.
Tabitha: You need me! What if-what if Monarchy get involved in your match? What if New Eden attacks you? Only I can protect you!!
Marina is out the door and it’s closing behind her. The camera stays on Tabitha and the palms that are compressing her temples.
You couldn’t ask for a better way to return from commercial break than by providing a close up of Karen McBride’s lovely face. She’s had more on her plate than Melissa McCarthy at an all you can eat buffet but she still finds the strength to smile. It isn’t very easy when she’s got one of the most obnoxious men in professional wrestling all up in her grill. Mason Van Stanton has tracked McBride down to the corridor the two are stood in, and now that he’s caught her his mouth won’t stop running. Karen pretends to be listening while she leans with the point of her elbow to the plain white wall at her side and struggles against unconsciousness.
Mason: I’m real-real-REEEAAL sorry if I overstepped my bounds two weeks ago. I just wanted to help, and you know, kinda prove my usefulness to your administration. If I did absolutely anything wrong then I will do WHATEVER it takes to make it up to you. I’ll say a thousand hail Marys, I’ll-I’ll-I’ll flog myself…without lubricant this time…I’ll…..
Karen: Listen Mason (she intervenes before her head explodes), between you and Howe, I’m through getting my ass kissed for one night….
Mason: But it’s such a pleasant ass to….
Karen: DON’T even finish that sentence, Mason.
He pantomimes zipping his lips, locking them together then throwing the key away.
Karen: If you want to prove to me that you’re truly on the up and up, then you’ll do the exact same thing I expect Howe’s client Miss Jon to do. Don’t tell me you’ve changed, SHOW ME you’ve changed.
Mason: If I were to, you know, prove my worth, would you then…maaaaaybe consssssidder giving me a job on your administration?
Karen: (She really has to think about this given Mason’s track record) I’ll tell you what I told Howe, I’ll take your proposition into consideration.
Mason: And I’ll do just like Miss Jon did, I’ll PROVE that I am a better man. I’ll go from Robert Downey Jr circa 2000 to Robert Downy Jr circa 2016.
Karen: Well, ummm you’ll definitely not be making nearly as much money as he does today.
Mason: You ever know, I hear people who main event Invictus get a few extra zeroes on their paychecks.
Karen: Main event Invictus?
Mason: The way I see it there’s only ONE WAY I can prove my worth to your administration. I’m going to enter the 2016 Last Stand Rumble and I’m going to win it in YOUR honor.
Karen: You’re going to enter the 2016 Rumble?
Karen: And you’re going to win it?
It takes everything, absolutely EVERYTHING in McBride’s power to keep from bursting into laughter.
Mason: Hey, it’s not as far-fetched as it sounds. If Miss Jon can change her ways then I can win the Rumble.
Karen: Alright, you got a valid point there. Miss Jon HAS surprised me the past couple of weeks, maybe you’ll do the same….
Comeau: SOMEONE GET HELP!!
The voice of backstage correspondent Mark Comeau travels down the corridor, alerting McBride, altering Van Stanton, alerting anyone in close enough proximity. All those who could hear come running, Karen leading the way with Mason bringing up the rear. They come up on Comeau kneeling to the floor, hovering over a body, a BROKEN body. The very same beautiful crew-member that Karen was arguing with earlier tonight is no position to argue now. She’s unconscious and lying face down in a halo of her own blood.
Karen: Did anyone see what happened!?!
The flustered Principle Owner stoops to check on the young woman but instead of examining a contused face her eyes are fixed on a reflection that appears in the blood gushing from those contusions. The blood provides a mirror image of Miss Jon’s face, revealing that she’s presently stood over the beaten and near lifeless body of the very same crew-member she bumped into earlier tonight.
JOHNNY KINGDOM OPEN INVITATIONAL BATTLE ROYAL
Well it looks like the IWC has decided to take a quantity over quality approach when it came to filling the ring with bodies set to compete in the first ever Johnny Kingdom Open Invitational Battle Royal. Sadly those who signed up for this inaugural bout are not the crème-de-la-crème of wrestling royalty. The very rarely seen Rich Anderson is just one of the many in the ring, and that should tell you something about the standard of competition set to battle it out here in a few moments. There are a lot of others who have joined this fray, and we really wish we didn’t have to name them off.
There’s Malachi Hunt, yes, he WAS on the roster at one point, there’s Mr. Ridiculous Fitzgerald with his socket puppet/manager, meaning that he legally qualifies as TWO entrants in this Battle Royal. Then there’s the likes of Denile Partis….good God Denile Partis.
It seems all the REAL talent is at the commentators booth where Greyson Lovejoy, Sparkles, and Frankie Paradise are welcoming their guest, the man responsible for this contest, Johnny Kingdom.
Greyson: (Speaking over Kingdom’s entrance theme music) We’ve got an Open Invitational Battle Royal moments from getting underway, and here’s the man responsible for putting it together. Hi there Johnny Kingdom.
Kingdom: Greetings gents.
The Team Leader is just now making himself comfortable in the empty chair at the end of the table, fixing the cuffs of his expensive leather jacket and the arms of his equally as expensive sunglasses.
Frankie: Uhhhh Johnny, I hate to be THAT guy, but do you really want to own up to being the person responsible for what we’re got in that ring right now? I mean I’ve seen better athletes in an amateur bowling league.
Kingdom: You know what, I do take full responsibility for being the man who put that sign-up sheet on the wall backstage, but I take NO responsibility for those who signed it.
Frankie: Aren’t you a wee-bit disappointed that we didn’t get more A-listers signing up to compete in this little preview you’ve arranged for the Last Stand Rumble?
Kingdom: Actually no, I’m not. See, this pretty much epitomizes exactly what I was talking about earlier tonight. The Rumble is a crap-shoot, where your standing on the roster, be it as an ‘A-Lister’ or a ‘D-lister,’ doesn’t matter, you stand just as good a chance as anyone else of walking out with a win.
Frankie: Yeah, but Kingdom, most the guys in the ring use up all their talent just making their entrance without botching, what makes you think they can win a Rumble?
Kingdom: I’ve seen crazier things happen, Frankie….
Frankie: Such as?
Kingdom: For starters, you having full time employment for the past two years.
Frankie: Oh hardy-har-har.
Greyson: Well guys we’ve got our last entrant in the Battle Royal going to the ring as we speak, and as you can see it’s the masked Disco Ninja. You know, he competed in the 2015 Rumble.
Frankie: Dear Gaaaahd, why did you have to remind us? You know what, while you’re at it, why not remind everyone who eliminated Disco Ninja from that Rumble last year? It was yours truly.
Disco Ninja is dancing right along to the middle of the ring where so many ‘athletes’ are just itching to get their hands on him.
Greyson: Johnny, do you care to explain what the rules are for this battle royal?
Kingdom: First of all, we’re NOT on a first name basis Lovejoy….
Kingdom: And secondly, it’s all pretty much standard fare. This match is contested under the exact same rules you’ll see at the Rumble, only way to get eliminated is via being thrown over the top rope where both feet have to hit the floor. Last guy standing, gets the honor of being crowned the first ever winner of the Johnny Kingdom Open Invitational Battle Royal, and then they go on to Last Stand with a definite chip on their shoulder.
Sparkles: Yeah, but something tells Sparkles that chip won’t help them when they’re facing off against the likes of guys such as you.
Kingdom: Well not to toot my own horn….
Frankie: Be fair Kingdom, when you start talking about yourself it’s not tooting your own horn, you’re playing the whole damn brass section of the orchestra.
Kingdom: I can’t dispute that, and I also can’t dispute Sparkles’ statement about what might happen to any of these guys should they get in my way during the Rumble. I’ve done a lot of things in my storied career….
Frankie: A story so old it makes the Bible look like an infant.
Kingdom:…but one thing I’ve NEVER accomplished in my entire wrestling tenure is winning the Last Stand Rumble. It’s my Moby Dick, it’s my Jeremiah Johnson….it’s just something I HAVE to accomplish before I hang up my boots for good. That’s another of my many motivations for putting together this Rumble preview match.
Much like the Rumble the ring is filled by a dozen or so competitors and once the bell rings they immediately set out to thin the herd via tossing one another over the top rope. The match is only it’s in earliest stages before a last minute entrant decides to make a fashionably late arrival.
Frankie: Oh shit….
Those fans who bought front row tickets instantly regret doing so when they come within inches of a man submerged beneath a layer of his own fecal matter. Teiji Shintaro, the Japanese Terror himself is making his way down the ramp with his ally Ricky Holt right there beside him step for step.
Kingdom: Greeeeat, I didn’t see the name of the Shit Demon from the movie Dogma anywhere on the sign-up sheet for this match.
Greyson: That’s Teiji….
Kingdom: I know that’s Teiji Shintaro, a man who has a fecal fixation, hence why he’s covered with shit and why he hangs out with shit….
Frankie: You talking about Ricky Holt?
Kingdom No, I’m talking about Fran Drescher, of course I’m talking about Ricky Holt. Someone somewhere SHOULD.
Sparkles: It looks like these two are crashing your Open Invitational Kingdom.
Greyson: Just like Holt crashed your training seminar back a few months ago.
Kingdom: Hey, it’s called OPEN Invitational for a reason. If they want to get in there and compete, more power to them.
Teiji gets in there, but he doesn’t HAVE to compete. All those who were in the ring before the arrival of Teiji and Holt have gone as still as statues. Actually they more resemble deer paralyzed by the sight of headlights barreling towards them at a high speed. Holt stands at ringside rejoicing in the sight of the fear he sees in the eyes of every competitor forced to share a ring with the Nightmare that he brought into the IWC several weeks ago. Those petrified talents don’t stay in that ring with that Nightmare for very long. The moment the bell sounds and Teiji steps out of the center of the squared circle everyone around him hightails it. Anderson, Hunt, Partis, all of the competitors who signed up for this Battle Royal eliminate themselves from it. They leave Teiji Shintaro and his self-mutilated body alone in the middle of the squared circle.
Greyson: That might have been the shortest Battle Royal I’ve ever seen.
Frankie: These guys might be talentless but they’re not brainless.
Kingdom: Let’s not give them too much credit.
Sparkles: All of Teiji’s opponents in this Battle Royal throwing themselves out to avoid having to encounter the Terror.
Kingdom: The man is covered in shit…he’s….covered….in….shit, what person in their right mind WOULD want to fight him?
Greyson: It isn’t just his obsession with fecal matter that caused all his opponents to shy away from fighting him. He’s DESTROYED so many talents since his debut. None of these guys wanted to be added to his list of victims.
Not only did every other person save for Teiji just jump out of the ring, they’re actually RUNNING away from it. The only person who doesn’t flee from Teiji, is Ricky Holt, who enters the squared circle with a microphone clasped in his hand. Like a dog Teiji drops to the feet of his master, he crouches down to his knees and starts to sway back and forth between them. All the while his snake like pupils focus on his next meal, sizing up Johnny Kingdom at the announce table.
Holt: Are any of you really that surprised?
Holt questions the fans, who ARE shocked to see so many flee so quickly from his murderous associate.
Holt: Look at them (points at the fleeing roster), look at ‘em RUN. (Points at the ring) Look, look at that, you know what that stain right there is, it’s the trail of piss that those pussies left behind. (Eventually Holt’s eyes turn to Johnny Kingdom at the announce table) But ya’ know, even though their pussies, even though their pissing themselves, at least they had the balls to stand in the same ring with Teiji Shintaro, which is more than I can say for certain ‘LEGENDS.’
Kingdom: I think he’s talking about you, Sparkles.
Sparkles: SPARKLES!?! But-but-but Sparkles can’t piss himself. I’ve tried!
Holt: This is just plain sad (gesturing with open palm towards Kingdom). Only a sham, a charlatan, a con artist like Johnny Kingdom would put together a Battle Royal, slap his name on it and totally puss out of competing in it himself. You proud of yourself, Kingdom? You glad you got that ten seconds of recognition without actually….WRESTLING? I shouldn’t expect anything less from a man who impersonates a REAL wrestler.
Kingdom: Frankie, do you enjoy the taste of solid food?
Kingdom: Then you might want to shut it before you’re eating liquids through a straw.
Holt: You’re so pathetic it actually makes me ashamed of myself. Because at one time, way-way back at the End of the Year Special I actually endorsed you. I convinced all these fans that you were an honest to goodness REAL wrestler. But your performance on that night, and your total lack of a performance here tonight, has devalued the worth of my word. So it’s no wonder that when I came out here two weeks ago and promised that I’d win the Last Stand Rumble that people were skeptical. They didn’t believe me, and that is YOUR fault.
Holt: You know what Kingdom? I think you owe me. Just like those ‘rookies’ of yours I took under my wing….
Greyson: He must be referring to those kids you were coaching at that training seminar Johnny, the ones that Holt beat to bloody pulps.
Kingdom: You think I need to be reminded of that?
Holt: You know what it is you owe me, Team Leader? An apology.
Kingdom: Haha, now you CAN laugh, Frankie.
Frankie: (Fake laugh) Ha-ha-ha.
Kingdom: Put some more effort into it next time.
Holt: I’ll tell you what Johnny, not that you deserve it, but I’m actually giving you a choice. There are two ways you can make things right with me. You COULD get into this ring and you could grovel at my feet BEGGING for my forgiveness. Or you could give Teiji and I the opportunity to show these people that I am exactly what I say I am, the odds on favorite to win the Rumble, and you can do that by getting into this ring and fighting the two of us right now. When we pitch you, the ‘odds on favorite’ to win the Rumble over the top rope, it’ll show the world that my word is as good as gold.
Kingdom: Heh, these guys are something else, one man eats shit, the other man talks it.
Holt: Come on now Kingdom, you either get in here and you BEG or you get in here and you BLEED.
There is no laughing, there is no joking, there is no emotion shown by Kingdom whatsoever. In a slow, CHILLING manner he rises from his chair, his headset slipping from his ears. The fans get more and more excited the closer that Kingdom gets to the ring.
Greyson: Johnny is headed for the squared circle.
Frankie: Hopefully he’s not suffering arthritis in those knees, cause he’s gonna be down on them for a while.
Sparkles: Oh if we know one thing about Kingdom, it’s that he’s NOT going to that ring to BEG.
Kingdom inches along towards the squared circle where Holt is egging him on and Teiji is just crouching and tasting the blood that seeps down out of his own gums. That’s not all Teiji tastes, getting a hefty serving of the brown substance on the tips of his fingers, licking it off. Kingdom takes one look at this disgusting visual and then into the depraved eyes of Holt. A decision is made and it’s not one that sets well with either man in the ring and all those in the stands. Instead of entering the squared circle Kingdom walks around it, moving to the ramp before ascending up it.
Greyson: Kingdom? Where-where-where are you going?
Frankie: Hahahaha, he’s walking away, aaaaah-hahahaha he’s walking AWAY!! I knew it! I knew it!
Sparkles: Sparkles is…..shocked.
Frankie: You shouldn’t be. What sane man, even if they are a ‘legend,’ would enter the ring with Teiji Shintaro and Ricky Holt?
As Kingdom disappears into the back the longing cries of his faithful fans are replaced with the heckles of his greatest detractor.
Holt: Don’t be so disheartened people. Would any of you have the courage to get in this ring with Teiji? Hell no you wouldn’t. So don’t go judging Kingdom for being just as big a coward as the rest of you, and as the rest of the roster in the back. If anyone should be disappointed it’s me. Because once again Kingdom has made my word MEANINGLESS. How is anyone to trust me when I say I’m going to win the Rumble, when I get no opportunity to show why I truly am a favorite to….
The mute button has been hit on Holt when the entrance music of Matthew Bowden come bursting through the PA system. Holt’s eyes almost burst out of their sockets and he suffers some whiplash when spinning his head so quickly to the stage. Stood under the bright lights and Holt’s heat ray vision is Matthew Bowden himself. Although Holt isn’t happy to see him, everyone else in the building clearly are. A big ovation is being directed at yet another man who entered himself into the Rumble two weeks earlier. That’s not the only thing that Bowden is entering himself into apparently.
Frankie: Da hale is he doing here?
Greyson: Matthew Bowden has had his fair share of exchanges with Holt and Teiji Shintaro the past few weeks.
Frankie: If he gets anywhere near that ring it’ll be his LAST exchange with either Teiji or Holt.
Bowden doesn’t go the ring, YET, cause he’s got something to say and the mic in his hand is going to make sure Holt hears him.
Bowden: So you want to prove that you’re one of the faves to win the biggest match of the year? Well ‘kid’….
Holt’s eyes once again widen as he mouths the word ‘kid?’
Bowden:…I had a pretty similar idea, which is kinda scary when you think about it, because that would mean you and I were on the same wavelength. That’s just…..(squirming and rubbing at his arms like they were crawling with roaches) YEESH….that’s freaky. Anyway, I want to show the world why I’m no scrub headed into the Rumble, and I have a great idea on how to do that.
If Holt was surprised before he’s gonna need a defibrillator at this point to restart his heart when it stops at the sight of Bowden rolling into the ring with him. Teiji doesn’t know what to make of this interruption, so he just sits back eating his own hair and watching.
Bowden: I say we do an over the top rope challenge of our own. First person to throw their opponent out of the ring wins. What do you say?
Holt: I say, you’re….
Bowden: Whoa-whoa-whoa (puts palm up to Holt’s face), who said I was talking to you?
The crowd lets out the obligatory ‘oooooh’ once they realize who Bowden was referring to. The plot thickens and tensions escalate as Teiji rises from his crouched position in order to give Bowden an answer to his challenge.
Bowden: The way I see it, throwing you (points at Holt) over the top rope proves jack shit. But tossing you (points at Teiji) out tonight not only gives me a little more legitimacy headed towards Last Stand, but does all these fans the favor of removing your stank ass from this ring. So what do you say you Cenobite wannabe, got the balls to take me on? Or did you cut those off and eat them too?
Holt: I’ll tell you what he says.
Actually Holt doesn’t say much at all, instead it’s his fists that do his talking. He swings one right upside Bowden’s jaw, knocking him back and into the ropes. The next shot Holt aims at Bowden’s head is delivered with a bit more force, building some momentum behind it. Holt charges at Bowden and swings, but his fist flies right over Bowden’s head and Holt’s body flies right over the top rope. At the last second Bowden drops down, grabs the top rope and low bridges his attacker. A stunned Holt trips over Bowden, trips over the cables and falls with a hard plunge to the floor.
Greyson: Oh wow! OH WOW! Bowden just-Bowden just THREW Holt out of the ring!
Frankie: So what? That just means he’s trapped in the ring now with Teiji Shintaro. And that’s worse than being on the friggin Green Mile.
Sparkles: It looks like Teiji is accepting Holt’s offer to face him in an over the top rope challenge.
TEIJI SHINTARO VS. MATTHEW BOWDEN
Just as soon as Matthew Bowden gets back to his feet Teiji Shintaro almost takes him right back off them. He nails a punch across Bowden’s cheek, and then a blistering knife edge chop across his chest. Teiji delights in every strike unleashed on Bowden, who he now Irish whips across the ring. Or at least that was his intention. Just before Bowden can be sent flying into the far cables he turns back to Teiji, slaps his hand away from his wrist and then delivers a lightning fast step up enzugari. The shot to the back of his head sends a disorientated Teiji staggering along into the ropes, falling against them and ALMOST falling over them. Bowden rushes in from behind and turns that ALMOST into a certainty. He grabs Teiji around the thigh, lifting it into the air and trying to send him flipping to the outside mats.
Greyson: Bowden’s gonna do it, he’s gonna throw Teiji out on his ass.
Sparkles: This is the first time we’ve seen Teiji show any sign of vulnerability whatsoever.
Greyson: Maybe Bowden has the number of this Nightmare.
Frankie: I’d hate to see what Teiji does if he gets eliminated, but I’m glad to see someone actually has the balls to step up and take him on. Unlike a certain Team Leader.
Greyson: Still shocked that Johnny Kingdom walked away from this fight.
Sparkles: Remember everyone, this is an over the top rope challenge, only way to win is to throw your opponent over the cables and to the outside of the ring.
Bowden doesn’t walk away from anything, in fact he’s RUNNING into it. Actually he’s RUNNING into a big boot that smashes Teiji right upside the cheek. The blow causes Teiji to NEARLY fall sideways over the cables that he was leaning against. Sadly almost WON’T be turned into a certainty by that last kick, so maybe a second one will make Teiji’s elimination happen. Bowden runs the length of the ring and builds momentum behind a second running big boot.
Sparkles: Bowden’s gonna do it! He’s gonna be the Nightmare’s NIGHTMARE!
Before Bowden can lift his boot Teiji shoots a thumb out and smashes the throat of his would-be attacker. The Asiatic Spike is hit with such force that it actually sends Bowden flipping head over asshole.
Greyson: Oh God! Oh God what a SPIKE!
Frankie: Teiji hit Bowden so hard in the throat that it might have just turned his Adam’s apple into a third testicle.
The force of the impact on his neck has Bowden struggling to breathe as he grips at his swelling esophagus. Teiji grips at another part of Bowden’s anatomy, his hair. He pulls his adversary by the bangs to his feet and then into an exploder t-bone suplex.
Greyson: Do you guys actually think that Teiji is going to try and eliminate Bowden from this match?
Frankie: That would mean he actually has some concept of the rules.
Sparkles; Fat chance of that, besides, even if he did, Teiji wouldn’t want to end the beating he’s giving Bowden at the moment.
A beating that Teiji just can’t get enough of. Already he’s continuing this beat-down via the diving headbutt that connects with Bowden’s collar bone. The impact has Bowden in terrible condition, but terrible isn’t good enough for his opponent. Teiji craves the total debilitation of his adversary and is doing everything in his power to make it happen, including biting at the bridge of Bowden’s nose.
Greyson: He’s biting him, Teiji is biting Bowden’s face off.
Sparkles: He can always get a replacement from Nicholas Cage.
The biting continues until the referee intervenes. The official wants to stop Teiji but he also doesn’t want to touch him. Finally he has to, grabbing the feces smeared bicep of Teiji and dragging him off his adversary. Teiji looks irate at the official and now moves in to outright murder him. Much like all the wrestlers who WERE in the ring to compete in the battle royal earlier on, the ref flees the ring to evade Teiji. Once the zebra has successfully fled the lion, the king of the jungle goes back after the weakened member of the herd. He climbs the nearest corner and then flies out of it into another headbutt aimed right at Bowden’s chest. Teiji’s skull crushes the sternum of his adversary, sending the recipient into convulsions. A twitching and writhing Bowden crawls towards the ropes where he will go on ailing from the beating he’s been getting, a beating that will now culminate in his elimination.
Teiji takes off across the ring, hurdling towards Bowden who was using the ropes to reach his feet. He won’t let those ropes be used against him, refusing to be knocked over the strands and sent crashing to the outside. The only thing that crashes is Bowden’s boot into the jaw of his inbound opponent. The kick knocks Teiji back and the kick flips Bowden back. He goes over the top rope, of his own volition, but thankfully he comes down on the apron.
Greyson: Bowden just about eliminated himself there.
Sparkles: Yep, cause this is an over the top rope challenge, a preview for the Rumble to be contested at Last Stand in two weeks.
Frankie: A match that Bowden WAS going to be part of. But he’s not gonna be part of anything but the celebrity wing at the hospital once Teiji is through with him.
Teiji might be finished with Bowden right now. As Bowden springs to the top rope Teiji comes running at him with the intent of knocking his legs out from under his body. Bowden BARELY avoids being pushed to the outside of the ring by leaping from the cables and over Teiji’s head. As a result Teiji just keeps running and hits the strands that his opponent just sprung off of. He bounces from the cables and staggers back into a big dropkick between the shoulder blades. The blow sends Teiji flying into the ropes once again, this time his stomach hitting the top cable. His upper half now hangs over the strands and is on the cusp of crashing into the floor. Somehow he manages to hold onto the ropes, forming a death grip on them. The strength of his grip is challenged when Teiji finds himself on the receiving end of a hesitation dropkick. Bowden runs across the ring and gets some tremendous airtime on the dropkick he hits through the ropes and into the face that was hung upside down on the opposite side. The kick hits with enough force to break Teiji’s grip on the cables and send him collapsing….TO THE APRON.
Sparkles: It was that close…THAT CLOSE! Teiji went over the top…..
Frankie: But his feet never hit that ground, did they!?!
Sparkles: No, they didn’t, and per the rules of this match, the bout goes on.
Greyson: We’ll be seeing a lot of near eliminations just like that one in the Rumble two weeks from now.
Teiji once again grabs the ropes and keeps hold of them even when he’s hit with another dropkick. Bowden runs across the ring, leaps to the perpendicular cables and springs off into a twisting dropkick aimed at Teiji’s face. The kick connects and causes Teiji’s grip to be broken on the ropes, his arms now swinging out to his sides as he leans back from the apron.
Teiji is DANGEROUSLY close to falling all the way to the floor and Bowden is going to make sure his opponent takes that plunge. He runs into the perpendicular ropes and springs from the middle strand, twisting into another dropkick. His boots travel towards Teiji’s face, only they just barely miss the jaw they were targeted for. With a mere second to spare Teiji ducks his head and Bowden’s boots go flying over his head. In fact, Bowden’s whole body goes flying over Teiji.
Bowden unintentionally flies to the outside of the ring, but not to the floor. He lands on the apron, on the apron right beside Teiji. The second that Bowden gets his balance he goes racing towards his opponent, determined to drill him across the skull with a forearm. Once again Teiji ducks his head and this time he doesn’t let Bowden’s body fly over him, he CATCHES him, catches him right across his shoulders. Teiji goes for a death valley driver that would send Bowden to the floor IF it had connected. It takes quite a bit of squirming but Bowden manages to slip out of his adversary’s arms and land BACK in the ring. Teiji turns around just as Bowden dashes across the canvas with the intent of knocking the Terror to the outside mats. All of Bowden’s plans change when a fist nearly goes straight through his head. The punch that nails Bowden in the orbital socket sends him twisting down to the ring.
Within moments of Bowden landing on his elbows and knees he finds his back crushed. Teiji leaps from the apron over the top rope, turns in mid-air, lands on the middle strand of the perpendicular cables then springs back into a moonsault. He crashes right across the back of his crawling adversary, driving Bowden into the ring and driving all the oxygen out of his body.
Greyson: Teiji Shintaro with some scary flexibility.
Sparkles: What isn’t scary about this guy?
Scary isn’t even strong enough to describe the feeling that Teiji gets out of his adversaries, save for the one bold enough to step up and fight him here tonight. Now we see where that boldness has gotten Bowden. He’s lying on his back being punched again and again and again right across the forehead. The concussing shots almost fracture the bones in Bowden’s face yet he’s still struggling. Teiji likes it when they struggle. He drags Bowden to his feet, charges him at the ropes and throws him right over.
Frankie: Goodbye Bowden….
Greyson: He’s not going anywhere Frankie.
The remarkable resiliency of Bowden is displayed yet again when he catches the top rope on the way over and manages to land on the apron across his rear.
Frankie: How the fuck is he doing thi….no-no….screw that…WHY the fuck is he doing this? Who would WANT to continue fighting Teiji?
It isn’t until Teiji’s accomplice Ricky Holt shouts from the outside of the ring that the Terror realizes his opponent is STILL in this match. Teiji isn’t bothered by this, he actually LOVES it. Because now he gets to use the weapon that he just pulled from his underwear, a FORK.
Greyson: Not that damned fork. We saw what Teiji did to Tyson Galloway with it.
Frankie: We haven’t see Tyson since Teiji got through with him and we won’t see Bowden ever again after this fight is over with either.
The blades of the fork go swinging over the top rope and towards Bowden’s face. The crowd screams as they watch Bowden reach out and catch Teiji’s wrist, blocking him from completing the stab to his face. Bowden pushes the fork back from his face while pushing himself back up onto his feet. There’s only way one he’ll prevent being stabbed, and it’s by reaching back, taking Teiji around the neck and hitting him with a stunner. Teiji’s throat snaps against the top rope, and the whiplash sends him staggering back to the middle of the ring. For the first time since we’ve seen Teiji in an IWC ring, he looks disorientated. And now he’s about to look concussed when Bowden goes flying off the top rope and swings a forearm straight into his forehead. The springboard forearm smashes Teiji right between the eyes, the impact causing him to teeter on his heels. Teiji is staggering back closer and closer to the ropes. Bowden realizes this is his grand opportunity, so he rinses and repeats. He jumps to the apron and then springs to the top rope, flying off and hitting a second forearm smash. The blow lands across the bridge of Teiji’s nose and leads to even more devastating results than the last blow. Teiji falls back entirely and lands with his spine arched over the top rope.
Greyson: Teiji teetering, teetering on the brink of going over the rope.
Sparkles: Bowden is doing what no one else has, he’s stepping up to Bowden and he’s taking him down.
Bowden looks shocked that Teiji is still upright but he’ll leave his opponent even more shocked once he’s sent him flying over the ropes. Bowden goes running into the far ropes to perhaps deliver yet another flying forearm. Before he can spring to the top rope he finds an obstacle getting in his way. Ricky Holt jumps up onto the apron and starts to mouth off to Bowden only to get that mouth shut via a running big boot. The kick sends Holt flying off the apron and right back down to the mats. Bowden spends little time rejoicing in his assault on Holt, because he’s got a Nightmare to deal with. Bowden spins around towards Teiji and then goes racing towards him, only to have his adversary step out of the ropes and go for ANOTHER Asiatic Spike.
This time Bowden’s throat is NOT crushed by the Spike. He ducks under Teiji’s swing and goes running right along into the ropes behind his would-be assailant. Bowden leaps over those cables and lands on the apron before going springboard. He leaps up top and comes flying into a forearm smash. Just as his elbow is about to crush the back of Teiji’s head the Terror turns and defends himself via spewing a mist from between his teeth. Liquefied shit strikes Bowden right in the eyes, blinding him entirely.
Greyson: Ew! EW GOD!
Sparkles: Teiji spraying shit straight into Bowden’s eyes!
Frankie: He’s blinded, blinded by fucking feces!
The blind Bowden staggers around rubbing at his eyes, desperately trying to regain his vision. That won’t happen in time to prevent falling victim to his opponent’s next move. Teiji swoops in behind his visually impaired adversary, catches him by the back of the head, runs him at the ropes and throws him over. Bowden has no idea what’s happening, all he can do is feel the impact of his body against the floor mats.
Greyson: First Bowden blinded and now he’s been thrown out of the ring.
Sparkles: It looked like he was going to eliminate Teiji until he got that mist in his eyes.
Greyson: Bowden so close…sooooo close to achieving a major momentum booster headed into the Last Stand Rumble, but dammit-DAMMIT Teiji’s fecal fixation saved him in the eleventh hour.
A cackling Holt slides into the ring and comes to a rest on his knees, pointing with both fingers towards a crouching Teiji. What Holt just watched was more hilarious to him than any Hollywood comedy, his sides are almost splitting after seeing Teiji eliminate Bowden. The referee is nowhere near as amused as Holt, nor is he all that excited about being the one forced to raise Teiji’s arm in victory. Nevertheless he steps in to do his job only to have Holt cut him off, demanding the honor. Holt pushes the referee out of the ring and then takes Teiji by the wrist, lifting it as the two strike a victorious pose. A pose that is short lived. Teiji doesn’t want to celebrate, he wants to maim. He rips his arm away from Holt, turns away from his partner in crime and looks towards the still blinded Bowden outside of the ring.
Greyson: Teiji isn’t threw with Bowden yet.
Frankie: And here I thought getting shit in his eyes was the worst that Bowden was in store for here tonight.
Sparkles: Sparkles doesn’t think we’ve truly seen Teiji at his absolute worst.
Teiji is about to show just how bad he can be if he were to get his hands on Bowden. He doesn’t get the opportunity to unleash all his masochistic impulses because the moment Teiji nears the ropes that separate him from his potential victim familiar music comes blasting through the speakers and brings him to a halt. Teiji isn’t the only one who looks to the stage, Holt’s eyes are fixating on it as well. Both men find themselves surprised by the image of Johnny Kingdom, who has returned and returned in a full neck to ankle custodial uniform. He is also wearing a set of yellow elbow length rubber gloves and an oxygen mask, making sure he is completely covered so he cannot be exposed to the fecal matter that covers Teiji’s body.
Greyson: Johnny Kingdom is back and hahahaha he’s dressed for battle.
Sparkles: He’s lifted a uniform from the janitor’s closet so he’ll be ready for Teiji Shintaro.
Frankie: How dare he treat Teiji like a damned joke! I hope he doesn’t think that custodial uniform is gonna protect him.
As Teiji licks the shit from his lips Holt bends at the knees and gives Kingdom the ‘just bring it’ taunt. Kingdom isn’t holding back now that he’s properly prepared. He comes running straight for the squared circle and once he gets inside Holt and Teiji are on him like crap on Teiji’s tongue. The two men have Kingdom pinned down to his stomach and are giving him no chance to get up, subjecting him to a barrage of forearm strikes.
Frankie: I told you guys he didn’t stand a chance.
Greyson: These two are all over Kingdom.
Suddenly the number’s advantage that Holt and Teiji had on Kingdom is neutralized. Matthew Bowden has regained his vision and is rolling into the squared circle…with the RING BELL in his hands. He quickly turns it into a weapon, swinging it straight at the head of the first man he sees. That man just so happened to be Holt and Holt just so happened to realize that the shot was coming. He ducks down out of the way and then goes rolling from the squared circle. All the can do now is watch as the ring bell smacks his partner right between the eyes. Teiji is spun away from Kingdom and smacked in the face with the steel.
Sparkles: Bowden back in there with a mother fuckin’ bell!
That bell chimes a second time when it smacks the bones in Teiji’s skull. One shot should have been enough to take a normal man down, but not even two blows has managed to remove Teiji from his feet. Has it addled him? Yes, but has it knocked him down? No. Teiji is still on his feet and is now sticking his tongue out in near Gene Simmons fashion. It looks like he’s begging Bowden to hit him with the ring bell again. That’s just what Bowden does, slamming the weapon into the Terror’s guts. The blow nearly breaks a few ribs and successfully doubles Teiji over. This allows Kingdom adequate time not to just recover but to pitch in on this assault. He stands at one of Teiji’s sides and Bowden stands at the other. Both men grab Teiji by the back of the head, run him towards the ropes and throw him over.
Greyson: They did it! Kingdom and Bowden just worked together to toss Teiji Shintaro outta the ring.
Sparkles: Is that what’ll take to eliminate him come the Last Stand Rumble?
Holt doesn’t even dare try to help Teiji up. He stands at a comfortable distance and YELLS at the Terror to get up off his ass. That’s just what Teiji does, and once he’s upright he’s flipping out, attacking anything and everything at ringside. He kicks the barricade then steps towards the steel steps, slamming his forehead against them repeatedly.
Frankie: Kingdom and Bowden have just pissed off the one person on planet earth they didn’t want to upset. They had better have eyes in the back of their heads during the Rumble.
At the moment both Bowden and Kingdom only have eyes on one another. Although they just helped one another out, it appears that neither man fully trusts the other.
Cameras bring Mark Comeau into view, the correspondent standing out in front of the interview zone. There is a mesh wall behind him, much like the mesh wall that will surround Taylor Chase, Mika Kozlov and New Eden later tonight when they step inside of a Steel Cage for a 2 on 3 handicap match. Comeau has that bout and so many other things to talk about as he addresses the camera stationed in front of him.
Comeau: It has been an absolutely tumultuous evening to say the least here in the Manhattan Center tonight, and things are going to be just as out of control in two weeks at Last Stand. Right now I’ve got some blockbuster news concerning what already promises to be one of the biggest nights in professional wrestling. Not only are we going to see the Riot brand and the Uprising brand collide for the very first time in the Rumble match where one winner moves on to challenge for their brands respective World Championship in the Invictus main event, but now I’ve just learned from Karen McBride, that the Queen of Wrestling Title will also be on the line at Last Stand. Mrs. McBride has not only ordered Desmond Drake to bring the title back to the ring at Last Stand, but to FACE the rightful champion Selena Frost one on one.
A pause is taken to give the crowd time to react to this jaw-dropping news.
Comeau: And that’s not all I heard. As many of you may be aware of, two weeks ago McBride was away from Riot because she was handling very secretive contract negotiations. Well, I have it on very good authority that our Principle Owner has secured the contract of an UPRISING brand talent and said talent will be revealed at Last Stand as the newest member of the Riot roster.
As if Last Stand needed another selling point.
Comeau: Wait, there’s even more news for me….
Jackson: Get the hell out of my way!
Famed IWC grappler Jackson Adams is as red as a bottle of hot sauce. He’s never looked as furious as he looks right now as he storms past Comeau, totally nudging the correspondent aside. Comeau doesn’t interest him, but a steel chain hanging from the mesh wall of the interview set DOES. Jackson grabs that chain, pulls it down and wraps it around his knuckles before heading off in the direction of the ring. The commentators express surprise over this late arrival.
Sparkles: Did Sparkles just see Jackson Adams?
Greyson: Your eyes aren’t deceiving you, Sparkles. That WAS Jackson Adams and from the looks of it, he’s coming to the ring!
Frankie: Didn’t he learn his lesson the last time he came out here? New Eden tore him a new asshole. That makes three of them. Is he going for a fourth?
Greyson: Adams is here to presumably avenge what New Eden did to his wife two weeks ago.
The frenetic pace of the show continues. Cameras have turned from one famed IWC icon to another, arguably the ORIGINAL IWC Icon, Orlando Cruze. At the moment he is sitting in a chair in the locker-room while sliding a black pad up onto his knee. The final arrangements are being made to physically prepare himself for his Manhattan Street Fight against rival Marina Valdivia.
Watson: Hey mate.
Orlando looks towards his Monarchy stable-mate Ryan Watson, who comes strolling on along into the dressing room with his hands tucked behind his back.
Orlando: Ah, if it isn’t the biggest gobshite in professional wrestling. What can I do for you, Ryan?
Watson: No-no mate, it’s not what you can do for me, it’s what I can do for you.
Orlando rises from his chair, crosses his arms and shows some intrigue.
Orlando: Go on.
Watson: I come bearing gifts. Something that’ll help you in your fight against Marina tonight.
Finally Watson reveals what was being hidden behind his back, the very same weapon that was used to cost Marina her match two weeks ago, a pair of brass knucks. Watson slips this small, but very potent weapon into Orlando’s palm.
Orlando: How thoughtful.
Ryan: I’m a thoughtful fella.
Riot returns from commercial break to find the holder of the most prestigious prize in all of professional wrestling in a position that no one wants to see her in. The World Champion Katelyn Buehler is laid out supine on a stretcher, trying to wrap herself around her badly injured arm. Stood at her side is a very concerned Dan Douglas and an equally as worried Destiny Nichols, Katelyn’s agent and best friend looking on despondently. They get pushed back by the EMTS who are working desperately to save Katelyn’s mutilated arm.
EMT: We need space to work.
Douglas: Tell me how extensive the damage is.
EMT: We won’t know until we’ve x-rayed it.
The camera zooms in on the contorted face of the champion, her expression one of total anguish.
Greyson: Things not looking very good for Katelyn Buehler.
Sparkles: Her arm was absolutely destroyed earlier tonight by Monarchy and Mika Kozlov.
Frankie: She didn’t stand a chance in hell of retaining the title at Last Stand, now even being in hell won’t increase her odds. Her reign as champion is over.
Katelyn Buehler’s title reign and career might be over, but one man is just getting started here tonight. Jackson Adams’ theme music is playing over the loud speaker as he walks down the ramp with a steel chain glistening around his knuckles. You better believe that chain is about to bust open some skulls.
Greyson: As Katelyn Buehler gets medical help in the back, Jackson Adams may be responsible for a few more bodies being shipped to the hospital.
Frankie: If he comes out here to tangle with New Eden it’s going to be HIM getting carted off to a morgue.
Sparkles: Two weeks ago Jackson was tied to the ring ropes and forced to watch what New Eden did to his wife, Emily. He’s got some wrath on his mind.
Frankie: Oh, he’ll get wrath alright.
The chain remains around Jackson’s fist and now a microphone is squeezed in his hand as well.
Jackson: I’m not wasting any time…
Promises Adams as he walks in circles around the squared circle.
Jackson: I’m here for one reason…New Eden…I’M CALLING YOU OUT!
The fans are going nuts upon hearing this news and upon seeing the absolute fire burning in Jackson’s eyes.
Jackson: Cassidy, Serenity, Cindy Todd, all three of you, that cage (points to the steel structure hung above the ring), that’s the least of your worries tonight. The only steel you should be concerned with is THIS steel right here (lifts his chain wrapped fist). You did some horrible things to the woman I love, so now I’m gonna return the favor. Now get your asses out….
Serenity: Jacky-Jacky-Jacky boy…..you’re so wound up.
The former World Champion Serenity has just emerged from the backstage area and looks unintimidated by Jackson’s threats. Actually, she seems AMUSED by them.
Serenity: You need to cut lose.
Jackson: That’s not all I plan to cut.
Serenity: Hahahahaha, oh Jacky, didn’t you ever hear that all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy?
Jackson: Alright, then how about you get into this ring and…how is it you put it….LET’S PLAY.
A big ole smile sits across Serenity’s face the more verbose Adams gets with his warnings and the closer she gets to the squared circle.
Serenity: I’d love to show you a reeeeeal good time, Jacky, but I’m kind of a busy gal. My date book is all filled up tonight. I got a Cage Match to compete in against my old friend Mika, and my frenemy Tay-Tay. So as far as your challenge goes, I guess I’ll just have to decline on New Eden’s behalf. Sowwwwwy.
Serenity lifts a finger to the center of her pouting lips.
Jackson: Heh, that’s cute Serenity, real cute. It’s adorable that you actually think you have a choice in the matter. Rather it’s tonight, or at Last Stand, I WILL get my hands on you and the rest of New Eden.
Serenity mouths the words “Last Stand” in confusion.
Jackson: Yeeeeaaah, that’s right Serenity, I heard you and Cindy Todd plan on entering the Rumble at Last Stand, that you have your sights set on the World Championship. Well if you won’t face me tonight, then I WILL enter MYSELF into the Rumble and I’ll send you, I’ll send Cindy, I’ll send every member of New Eden flying over that rope unti…..
Serenity: Ugh. Fine-fine-fine….(Serenity is getting bored)….this is starting to get real old real fast. If you want New Eden that badly, then I say why the hell not?
Before Serenity heads into the ring she turns her side to the entrance ramp, gesturing for someone to come out. That someone is her New Eden stable-mate Cassidy Haze and much like Jackson Adams she doesn’t show up for a fight empty handed. In her clutches is a 2×4 wrapped in barbwire, the very same weapon that did so much damage to Jackson and to his love Emily Cage two weeks earlier.
Greyson: Has Jackson Adams just made the biggest mistake of his life?
Frankie: No question about it. Because his LIFE won’t continue after this fight is over.
Sparkles: Not if Cassidy Haze puts that barbwire board to use, the very same weapon that will be hanging over the ring during her Stairway to Hell match against Marina Valdivia at Last Stand.
Cassidy just can’t wait to use that 2×4 and will get jollies by using it on Jackson Adams. Most would run, most would cower, most would hide when seeing New Eden coming at them with barbwire in hand, but Jackson does none of those things. He stays in the ring, he bares down, and he readies himself for a fight. That’s just what he gets, Serenity and Cassidy slide into the squared circle and Jackson goes after them. His chained fist swings towards New Eden but it never connects. Serenity hits an inside leg trip on Adams, dropping him to his back. She now crawls seductively over Jackson, mounting his chest and holding his hands down to the canvas by the wrists.
Serenity: Let’s put some color in those cheeks.
That color will be blood red. Cassidy kneels over Adams and starts to grind the barbwire back and forth across his flesh.
Greyson: This is sickening.
Sparkles: This might be even worse than the beating that Katelyn Buehler got earlier on tonight.
The barbwire peels and rips and grinds the flesh from Jackson’s forehead, reopening the wounds that were created several weeks ago by this very same weapon. Blood is now pouring out of Jackson’s scalp and puddling across his face. Serenity can’t help herself, licking that blood from Jackson’s cheeks like he were an ice-cream cone. There’s only one thing that could bring an end to this depravity, and it’s the intervention of Marina Valdivia. The place comes unglued at the sight of Marina barreling down the ramp but stopping just short of the squared circle. She hesitates to enter only because she’s reaching beneath the ring and securing a weapon all her own…..a LADDER.
Greyson: Marina is here! Marina Valdivia is here to help!
Sparkles: More like to get her hands on Cassidy just two weeks before they face off in Stairway to Hell.
It won’t be Marina’s hands that connect with Cassidy.
The demented Cassidy spots Marina outside of the ring and will take full advantage of this opportunity to maim her. She steps towards the ropes still holding the 2×4 wrapped in barbwire and preparing to use it. She sticks her head through the ropes to see the blood that will come oozing from her rival’s face. And the blood will be surging, only it’s not going to come from Marina. The ladder that she just dragged from beneath the ring is rammed right into the bridge of Cassidy’s nose. The steel smacks Cassidy in the face and instantly bursts some capillaries. Cassidy falls back into the ring palming at her bent nostrils as blood comes oozing from them.
Sparkles: Oh shit…Marina just BROKE Cassidy’s nose!
Greyson: With the very same ladder that will come into play between these two in that Stairway to Hell match at Last Stand.
Frankie: This woman is just as suicidal as Jackson Adams.
Greyson: No, she’s just as sick of these sadists as Jackson Adams.
Sparkles: She has the chance to conclude her rivalry with New Eden once and for all at Last Stand.
Greyson: Yeah, but she has to put her spot in the Rumble on the line to finish that war.
It looks like we won’t have to wait until Last Stand to see that war explode. Marina slides the ladder into the ring and then rolls in herself. Serenity could go after her but instead she’s going after her own partner Cassidy, helping her out of the squared circle. The two regroup at ringside where Serenity is checking on her associate’s busted nose. Cassidy pulls her palms away from her face, looking at all the blood that is puddled upon them. The second she sees her own blood Cassidy tries to get back in the ring only to be restrained by her partner.
Serenity: Save it. (Whispering into Cassidy’s ear) Save it for the Cage (points to the steel structure hung above the ring).
Cassidy licks the blood off of her philtrum and then smiles with a row of jagged teeth. She enjoys the taste of her own blood almost as much as she’ll enjoy spilling it from Marina’s skull.
Greyson: Man it’s gonna get violent when Marina and Cassidy face off in the Stairway to Hell.
Things are about to get pretty violent right now. Jackson Adams has rolled out of the squared circle and is following New Eden up the ramp. Although he’s doubled over with blood seeping from the gashes in his face, Adams still clutches the very same steel chain he brought to the ring with him and is determined to use it.
Greyson: Jackson giving pursuit to New Eden.
Frankie: The man doesn’t need medical help, he needs a psychological evaluation.
Sparkles: What Jackson needs is to get his revenge on Serenity and Cassidy.
Marina has turned away from the departing Jackson Adams and is stooping down to pick up the ladder that she used as a very potent weapon just a few moments ago. In a symbolic manner she sets that ladder up in the center of the ring and then starts to climb it. The crowd couldn’t be any happier and more excited at the sight of Marina standing high-high-HIGH above the squared circle, giving the world a preview of what they’ll see at Last Stand.
Greyson: Marina stood at the top of that ladder.
Sparkles: Is this what we’ll see? Is this what we’ll see at Last Stand when Marina Valdivia takes on Cassidy Haze in a Stairway to Hell match?
Frankie: She had better hope so, because if Cassidy gets to the top of that ladder first, she’ll pull down the barbwire board that will be hanging above the ring and she’ll end Marina’s friggin’ career.
Greyson: At Last Stand we’re going to witness an unholy encounter between Marina and Cassidy, and if Cassidy wins then Marina is out of the Last Stand Rumble.
Sparkles: But remember that the rest of New Eden are not going to be banned from ringside during that ma……AAAAH!
Suddenly the ladder that Marina was standing at the top of starts to tip over. Marina’s eyes widen as she finds herself falling…falling from tremendous heights. She doesn’t fall to the ring, she falls even further, tumbling outside of it. She flies over the ropes and then into the floor-mats! Who does she have to thank for this career shortening plunge? Her opponent in the Manhattan Street Fight, Orlando Cruze!
Greyson: NOOO! Orlando-Orlando-Orlando Cruze, he just knocked Marina off the top of that ladder!
Frankie: Brilliant….absolutely BRILLIANT!
Sparkles: Orlando just got the drop on Marina.
Frankie: No, Marina was the one who dropped, and Orlando was the one who pushed her, hahahahaha.
Greyson: Orlando Cruze and Marina Valdivia are scheduled to compete in a Manhattan Street Fight, but can she even continue after that fall from the ladder?
MARINA VALDIVIA VS. ORLANDO CRUZE:
MANHATTAN STREET FIGHT
A frantic Orlando Cruze stands in the center of the ring gesturing to the back, calling someone out. Finally a referee comes hustling down the ramp to preside over the bout between Orlando and a helpless Marina. We find out just how defenseless Marina is when she begins to peel her own body off of the mats. In a display of sheer will and determination a defiant Marina starts to force herself up from the ground that she just took such a nasty plunge into. Although her whole body is racked with anguish Marina manages to crawl towards the apron and use it to stand up. Although Orlando could go for the kill move he opts instead to hang back in the center of the ring, letting Marina exhaust whatever energy she might have left.
Greyson: This is not the way I thought this Manhattan Street Fight would start at all.
Sparkles: It’s a shame, really it is. Marina has been dying to get her hands on Orlando and end the rivalry that has developed between the two since back in 2015.
Frankie: Well Marina’s not gonna get what she wants for once. Should we all pout and piss and moan about it?
A shit eating grin is worn on Orlando’s face as he watches Marina struggle and strain to get herself back into the ring. Amazingly she manages to pull it off, she does it, Marina gets back into the ring….and that’s about ALL she can do. She just depleted absolutely everything she had left in her body to get in the ring, which accomplished only one thing, putting herself totally at the mercy of her opponent. A smug Orlando approaches his prone opponent and then casually leans down to grab her by the hair. Something is caught…Orlando! He’s pulled down into a shocking small package pin.
Greyson: Marina lured him in and she’s caught him!
The ref’s hand comes dangerously close to hitting the canvas before Orlando kicks out.
Frankie: Oh God-oh God that was close, that was WAY too close.
Sparkles: Marina seconds away from scoring a shocking pinfall over Orlando.
Needless to say Orlando would have been irate had the match ended in that capacity. There’s only going to be one way it ends and it’s via the superkick that he just unleashes on the jaw of a kneeling Marina.
Frankie: SUPERKICK! The Monarchy superkick!!
Greyson: Marinas been on the receiving end of that move a few times.
Frankie: Well this will be the last time.
Orlando flings himself over Marina’s chest and hooks both of her legs.
Once again the Phenom finds himself SHOCKED when Marina pops her shoulder up off of the canvas.
Greyson: No. Not yet. Marina is channeling everything, everything she’s got into staying alive in this Street Fight.
Orlando realizes that that’s exactly what this match is….A STREET FIGHT. He finally takes advantage of the lack of rules, grabbing the ladder that he tipped Marina off the top of and preparing to turn it into a weapon. Marina employs what she’s got left in the tank to stand up. Sadly she’s not up for long because the very top of the ladder crushes her face. Orlando runs the length of the ring with the ladder loaded up on his shoulder and eventually he smacks it across his rival’s brow.
Greyson: Marina’s face just OBLITERATED by that ladder.
Frankie: I’m betting Marina really regrets bringing that ladder into the ring now.
Sparkles: She used it to save Jackson Adams from New Eden and now it’s been turned against her in a major way.
The ladder that just destroyed Marina’s face is now tossed to the outside of the ring. Clearly Orlando thinks he doesn’t need it anymore, that he’s got Marina precisely where he wants her. He doesn’t go for a pin, he goes for something even more humiliating for his opponent, the submission. Orlando lifts Marina’s legs into the air and grins at the crowd before wrapping them around his own. A despondent Marina is rolled to her stomach where she’s placed in the sharpshooter.
Frankie: Sharpshooter clamped on, it’s over now guys.
Greyson: Marina has battled through a fall from the top of that ladder, a superkick and a blow from the ladder itself, can she endure the sharpshooter?
Sparkles: Think Marina, think about all the disrespect that Orlando has shown you since he joined Monarchy.
Greyson: And he did so seconds after Monarchy had laid Marina out.
An injured Marina summons her last vestige of will to start crawling along towards the ropes, pulling a smug Orlando behind her. He seems very amused that Marina is TRYING to escape his sharpshooter. However, Marina is doing a lot more than simply TRYING. She’s actually doing it, she’s clawing her way along towards the ropes and pulling Orlando along for the ride. Orlando doesn’t lose his smile even when he’s informed by the referee that Marina has reached the ropes.
Greyson: She’s got ‘em, she’s got the ropes.
Sparkles: What’s so funny Frankie?
Frankie: It doesn’t matter if Marina reached the ropes. This is a Street Fight, there are no disqualifications, that means there are no rope breaks.
Greyson: Dammit, you’re right.
The ropes provide no salvation for Marina. She remains in the sharpshooter, she remains in the worse pain of her entire life and Orlando continues to be the one who goes on inflicting it. If the ropes can’t save her then maybe there’s something outside of the ring that can. She grabs the ring apron and pulls it, managing to drag her body under the very same ropes that provided her no escape from the sharpshooter. Orlando can’t hold onto the sharpshooter now that Marina is spilling completely out of the squared circle and to the arena floor.
Greyson: In spite of not being able to use the ropes Marina has still managed to escape the sharpshooter.
Frankie: The damage is done though. There’s nothing that Marina can do to recover from that hold.
The wear and tear of the submission is evident as Marina languishes at ringside. Orlando takes his sweet time pursuing her. He steps to the apron, yawns with indifference and then leaps into a double axehandle. He smashes Marina right over the lower back, driving what fight she had left out of her body. Instead of concentrating on injury, Orlando focuses on insult. He blows a snot rocket down onto Marina’s back and then reaches past her, grabbing something from beneath the squared circle. That something is a TABLE.
Greyson: First ladders, now a table.
Sparkles: Orlando pulling no punches, he’s bringing out all the heavy artillery.
Greyson: He has to, he can’t afford to let Marina get back into this contest.
The table that is now set up at ringside will be used to ensure that Marina cannot even get out of the gates in this contest. Orlando drags his opponent ono the apron and now stands over his damn near unresponsive adversary, taking his time as he systematically dissects her. With that ever present smug smirk on Orlando’s face he puts Marina in a back drop suplex position, intent on using that move to put her through the table at ringside. Once again Cruze yawns as he lifts Marina into the air, prepares to use the suplex but then finds his move thwarted and in the most destructive manner one could possibly imagine. Just as Marina is loaded onto Orlando’s shoulder she turns her body around, applies a front chancery on her adversary and counters into a TORNADO DDT….a tornado DDT that pulls Orlando off the apron and puts his head through the table.
Frankie: WHAT THE HELL!?!
Greyson: DDT! DDT through a table!
Sparkles: Orlando’s head crashing through that wood at ringside!
The fans are awe stricken by what they just saw, Orlando’s face splitting the wood. He lies unconsciously right beside Marina, who hasn’t moved since she delivered that last move. Finally she starts to budge, getting up and grabbing Orlando around the neck in the process. All the muscles in her body are strained in order to return Orlando into the squared circle where she can go for the pin.
Greyson: This is it, Marina going for the cover on a man she once admittedly respected.
Frankie: Some way to show your respect, first she DDTS him through a table knowing he has a history of head injuries, and now she’s humiliating him with this pin.
The crowd stops counting along because they now let out a huge sigh at the sight of Orlando rolling his shoulder from the canvas. Marina starts to crawl away from her opponent before she suddenly comes to a sudden stop. She sees something, something that has her mesmerized, and that something is a 2×4 wrapped in barbwire.
Frankie: Oh no. Don’t you dare.
Greyson: Marina locking her eyes on that barbwire board that Cassidy Haze left in the ring a few moments ago.
Sparkles: She’s gonna carve herself up a Phenom.
Frankie: Do something ref.
Greyson: It’s no disqualification, Frankie, you reminded us of that fact just a few moments ago.
Orlando is fighting through a potential concussion as he slowly ascends to his feet, having no idea that he might be walking into a blow from the barbwire board. Marina has the weapon in hand and is staring to swing at her rival. However, at the last second the board is torn right out of Marina’s hands. She whips around and angrily glares into the face of Monarchy’s Ryan Watson.
Greyson: Damn you Ryan Watson!
Frankie: The Gobshite strikes again!
Sparkles: He’s been all over the place helping Monarchy out here tonight.
Frankie: What a great team-player.
Marina pulls her fist back to knock Watson out but he’s already clearing from the ring and doing so with the barbwire bat. He walks up the ramp lifting the board above his head, pointing at Marina and antagonizing her.
Sparkles: Watson taking the barbwire board to the back and making sure Marina can’t use it.
A flustered Marina turns away from the departing Watson and into the incoming superkick. Orlando unleashes yet another kick aimed at Marina’s head but this one fails to connect. Marina dives under the kick, catches Orlando around the thigh and pulls him down into the school boy.
Greyson: Did Marina sneak in and pick up the pin?
Orlando doesn’t let the match end that way, lobbing his shoulders from the ring. He kicks out with such authority that it sends Marina twisting along into the ropes then falling against them for support. Her legs can barely hold her upright, her whole body just wanting to go down. That’s exactly what Marina does, she falls to the ring in order to hit a rolling thunder. She comes down back first right across the canvas. She had been targeting Orlando’s chest but she missed on account of her opponent sitting up in the nick of time to avoid being crushed. Marina hits the ring with enough force to send her flipping over onto her elbows and knees. She starts to get up just as Orlando comes running in at her side, catching her by the head and pulling her around into the swinging neck-breaker. With little time to spare Marina manages to pluck her head right out of Orlando’s arms then turn to face his spine. She puts her hands to Orlando’s back and gives him a shove, sending him charging into a chest first crash against the turnbuckle. Orlando manages to hold onto the very same corner he just collided with and now he begins to fidget with the padding around the top rope.
Orlando is so preoccupied with the turnbuckle that he doesn’t see Marina going for another rolling thunder. She flies out of it into a big splash aimed at Orlando’s back, but it’s not the spine of her opponent that she connects with. Orlando manages to side step Marina, who goes flying past him and into the corner, where the top turnbuckle bolt has just been exposed.
Greyson: Marina’s face is gonna hit that bolt!
Sparkles: No, she caught herself-she caught herself right before she smashed into the steel!
Amazingly Marina lands on the middle rope and avoids a face first impact with the turnbuckle bolt. What she can’t avoid is what Orlando has in store for her next. He runs in behind Marina and catches her around the waist, dragging her off the middle rope she had been standing on and into the German suplex. Amazingly in mid-air Marina manages to flip herself completely over, landing on her feet. Orlando has no idea that Marina turned things around, he’s standing up tapping his temple and implying that he’s the smartest man in the building. His intelligence might drop a few IQs when he turns around and finds himself on the receiving end of a big splash that drives his back right into the turnbuckle bolt he exposed moments earlier.
Orlando bounces off the bolt, twisting away from it so that his back is aimed towards the ring that his shoulders are now being dragged to. Marina catches him around the head and drops into the reverse DDT.
Sparkles: Orlando hitting that turnbuckle bolt and if that wasn’t bad enough he staggered right along into that reverse DDT.
Greyson: He brought it on himself.
Frankie: Orlando HAS to do underhanded things to save himself, because from the moment that bell rang Marina has recklessly been targeting his head. And we all know how Orlando has a well-documented history of head injuries.
Both Marina and Orlando look like they’ve seen far better days but they continue to carry on. A fatigued Marina gets to her feet with the aid of the ropes and then drops into the rolling thunder. She comes crashing down straight across Orlando’s rib-cage, hitting the move successfully this time. Orlando grips at his mid-section, feeling like he’s in worse pain than he’s ever been. Nevertheless he gets back to his feet just as Marina swoops in, takes him around the neck and points at the turnbuckle. There’s quite the reaction as Marina runs at the corner where the turnbuckle bolt has been exposed, steps up and pushes off into yet another tornado DDT. But Orlando pulls off an improbable counter, using his remaining strength to SHOVE Marina off her front chancery. She is sent flying back to the middle of the ring where she lands on her feet. Marina then finds her wrist caught and her body being Irish Whipped right into the exposed turnbuckle bolt. Marina’s face cracks against the bolt and the impact leaves her absent mindedly stumbling back into Orlando’s German suplex. He keeps the bridge applied to score the win
Greyson: Marina’s face into the bolt and now her body into the German suplex!
Frankie: Chalk up another win for Monarchy.
There is a somber reaction to Marina being pinned….but that reaction changes to an exhilarated outburst when Marina gets her shoulder up. The shaking fingers of Orlando are cupping his face as he tries to come to terms with the fact that Marina just kicked out. Finally he manages to overcome his aggravation, leave the ring and then return to it with not one, but two steel chairs in his clutches. Orlando opens those chairs and sets them up side by side.
Greyson: The wheels in Orlando’s head are turning….
Sparkles: Desperation is setting in.
Greyson: And desperation makes people do desperate as well as DESTRUCTIVE things.
Destruction is evidently on Orlando’s mind as he pulls Marina up from the ring and throws her into the ropes. He catches her coming back in with a Samoan Drop, about to plant her back through the chairs. Such calamity is avoided when Marina slips around Orlando’s shoulders and manages to counter into a sunset flip. Unfortunately she can’t get Orlando to drop to his back so that she can pin his shoulders to the ring. He has his feet rooted to the ring and isn’t about to be rolled up. The only thing that goes down are Orlando’s hands, reaching through his legs, grabbing Marina by the throat then using his immense strength to deadlift her from the canvas. Orlando keeps lifting, throwing Marina up into the air and then catching her on top of his shoulders. It appears that he’s going to hit that Samoan Drop through the chairs no matter what. Once again Marina blocks the move from connecting by driving her elbow repeatedly into Orlando’s temple. The blows finally cause Orlando to let her go, Marina dropping down behind him.
Orlando swings around to behead her with the clothesline but Marina manages to duck the attempted lariat then run into the ropes. Marina springs off the middle cable, turns in mid-air and comes flying right into Orlando…right into Orlando’s shoulders. He catches her with a Samoan Drop….into the chairs!
Frankie: HAHAHAHAHA! Yes! YES!!
Greyson: Marina DRIVEN Into those chairs!
Frankie: Someone get Marina a toe tag.
Marina rolls out of the wreckage of chairs and to the center of the ring. Somehow she’s still moving, but she might not be moving for very much longer. Orlando goes old-school, climbing the far corner and balancing himself on the top rope. A badly wounded Marina works her way up from the ring and walks right into the CRUZE MISSILE.
A missile dropkick nails Marina straight in the chest and the impact sends her back flipping completely over before coming down on her face.
Greyson: CRUZE MISSILE!
Frankie: Orlando ending this match in grand fashion.
Although he’s all banged up Orlando can still smile, grinning with the realization that victory is in his hands. He crawls into the cover.
The crowd is screaming louder than ever, all because Marina defied expectations once again by KICKING OUT. Neither Orlando nor the crowd can quite believe that Marina just got her arm up again. Orlando is so mad you can almost see steam spouts shooting out of either of his nostrils. He aggressively rips Marina off the ring and into the stiffest uranage slam he has EVER unleashed. Marina isn’t just driven down onto the back of her head, she’s almost put right through the damned ring. Orlando follows this absolutely deadly urange with a hook of the leg.
If Orlando had hair it would end up clumped in the palms of his hands because Marina just now got a shoulder up once again. Orlando crawls to the middle of the ring and pounds the side of his fist against the canvas. The snarling Phenom at last settles on a course of action that should end this battle. He pulls Marina into the corner sits her there and then places a chair across her face. Orlando slowly backs away from her, stomping his foot as he lines up a superkick on the chair that is placed in front of his adversary’s skull.
Frankie: So many plastic surgeons are gonna be pissed, because that surgically altered face is about to be crushed.
Greyson: Orlando has been so close to winning this Street Fight on a number of occasions in this match, will a superkick into the chair at last do it?
Orlando gets a running start behind his superkick only to stop in mid-kick when Marina rolls out of harm’s way. She ends up on the apron and unbeknownst to her angry opponent, she does so with the steel chair in hand. Orlando comes running towards the cables that separate him from his opponent, but now a chair separates them as well. The steel flies towards Orlando’s face only to be caught, plucked out of the air before it could rearrange his features. Just as Orlando starts to count his blessings his priorities change to counting his teeth. Marina leaps to the top rope, flies off and hits a dropkick right into the chair that Orlando was holding in front of his face. The impact sends the Monarchy member unconsciously staggering back into the ring. To the astonishment of everyone in the arena Orlando remains on his feet as he ricochets off the ropes and walks right into the boot to his gut followed by a DDT into the chair laid out on the canvas. Orlando’s head bounces off the chair and causes him to pop up to his knees, a position his opponent takes advantage of. Marina runs in and hits a hurricarana driver on her adversary’s head, slamming the top of his head right into the chair once again.
Greyson: Incredible combination….
Sparkles: Incredibly DEADLY combination.
Frankie: See, I told you, Marina is trying to KILL Orlando.
Greyson: His head isn’t made of glass.
At the moment it feels like Orlando’s skull has been broken like glass, his skull left in fragments after all these slams into the chair. He rolls to his back and Marina seems at peace with finishing him off. She takes the chair that has served her so faithfully over the past few moments then places it on Orlando’s chest. Marina digs deeper than she’s ever dug in order to climb to the apron then go springing to the top rope. She is just about to come flying off before she sees her opponent rolling out from under the chair. Marina is unable to hit whatever bone breaking move she had strategized. She comes off the cables but not with a leap. She lands on the canvas feet first and then goes charging towards her adversary, who has to employ the ropes to hold himself up. She finds out that her opponent was maybe not as prone as he was letting on. She finds this out when she runs into his boot, Orlando hitting her under the jaw with a superkick.
The shot causes Marina to go twisting away from Orlando, eyes rolling to the back of her skull. A banged up Orlando steps in and takes Marina around the waist, looking to follow up the superkick with another brutal German suplex. Orlando lifts Marina into the air but finds out he didn’t lift her fast enough. Marina manages to reverse his suplex by falling forward towards the canvas.
Nope, Orlando won’t let her do it. He takes her around the waist and lifts her right back up into a wheelbarrow suplex. Sadly he can only get her up to his chest before he finds out that she was holding a steel chair in her hands, a chair she grabbed off the ring and a chair she is swinging back over her head. The steel slams against Orlando’s face, resulting in him being unable to block Marina from dragging him down into a roll up. She’s seated on his chest and holding him down by the creases of his knees.
Marina feels victory in her clutches but she no longer feels Orlando’s knees in her hands. Orlando kicks out once again.
Greyson: Another close fall there. What a NAIL BITTER this has been.
Sparkles: It’s definitely been a white knuckle thrill ride thus far.
It isn’t easy but Marina gets to her feet and walks into the corner, leaning on it for support. Finally she finds the energy to start climbing and climbing closer to the top of the turnbuckle. The California Splash is going to make a hell of an impact on her beleaguered opponent. She’s on the top rope with her back still aimed in Orlando’s direction. She comes off the top rope, but it isn’t into the 450 splash. To a jaw dropping response Orlando pops to his feet and pops up the corner Marina is standing on and then pops off with a top rope German suplex. Marina is sent flipping across the length of the ring before ultimately right on her face.
Greyson: Top rope! Top rope! Top rope GERMAN SUPLEX!
Sparkles: That killed her! It friggin killed her.
Greyson: But how much did it take out of Orlando Cruze in the process?
Apparently Orlando has enough to grab a steel chair and place it over the back of Marina’s head. He lunges into the air and then stomps down at the chair, shattering Marina’s skull beneath it.
Frankie: That was just nasty…I love it!
While Marina is convulsing, Orlando is ascending. His body is warn to a frazzle but that’s not going to stop him from climbing the turnbuckle.
Greyson: When do we ever see Orlando do this?
Frankie: Maybe he’s going for the Cruze Missile.
Sparkles: Sparkles wouldn’t doubt it, it almost got him the win a few moments ago.
Orlando shouldn’t be able to stand at this point but he’s not just standing he’s standing on the top rope. Although he’s in unfamiliar territory on the top rope it doesn’t stop him from lifting fingers into the air then rotating them around one another, signaling for….a 450 SPLASH?
Greyson: Excuse me a moment while I GAG.
Frankie: Don’t worry. I’ve dated a lot of women who have that problem. But it’s mostly when my dick is in their mo….
Greyson: ANYWAY. It looks like Orlando is not only about to pin Marina, he’s gonna do it with her own California Splash.
Frankie: Is there anything that Orlando CAN’T do?
Sparkles: Seamlessly pull off a mullet?
Not only is Orlando going to deliver a 450 but he’s going to do it onto the chair that is still draped across the back of his adversary’s head. Laughter comes from Cruze as he descends into a 450 that is going to potentially crack Marina’s skull. He hits the chair, but he didn’t hit the skull that WAS under it. Marina pulls away at the last second, causing Orlando’s chest to snap when it strikes steel.
Frankie: Damn you Marina!
Sparkles: She got out of the way! She got clear from the 450.
That’s not all Marina is doing, she rolls into the very same corner that Orlando just came flipping out of. Within a few moments Marina is on the top of that turnbuckle before she comes flying off of it into the 450…..She’s hurdling towards Orlando with the California Splash. And she hits….that is her face hits the brass knuckles that Orlando just slipped onto his fist. From his back he swings his brass knucks into Marina;s forehead, knocking her unconscious on impact.
Greyson: The brass knucks!
Sparkles: The very same weapon Monarchy used to pin Marina two weeks ago!
Frankie: I don’t remember knucks being used two weeks ago, but they were totally legal in this street fight.
Orlando crawls painstakingly into the cover on Marina, hooking the creases of her knees.
Greyson: This is disgusting. I’m sick at the thought of Marina falling victim to this twice.
Frankie: The GOLDEN girl fails to beat Monarchy again.
Once again the power of Monarchy has been displayed, but on this night that power wasn’t sufficient enough to keep Marina’s shoulders down to the canvas. A split second before the three Marina gets her shoulder off the ring.
Sparkles: God in heaven! God….in….heaven.
Greyson: I am literally speechless.
As is the crowd, who find it difficult to get their jaws up off the floor after witnessing Marina getting her shoulder up even after suffering a blow from the brass knuckles. Orlando is so beside himself he’s literally having an out of body experience. He strains what strength remains in the depths of his body in order to stand up with a handful of Marina’s hair in his hand. With one hand he pulls Marina up to her knees, with the other he clinches his fist around his pair of brass knuckles.
Orlando takes a moment to savor this, truly basking in the barbarism he’s going to unleash on Marina’s face. He swings around with the brass knuckles cracking Marina right in the cheek. The shot knocks her flat on her back. Unconsciously she rolls away from Orlando and in the direction of the corner, her arms falling over the ropes. Orlando snags her by the back of the head, forces her up to her feet and then drags her to the middle of the ring where he prepares to bust her in the softest part of the skull with the brass knuckles. He swings but not fast enough to avoid Marina’s counter…in the form of a mule kick that nails Orlando right in the crotch.
Greyson: A kick straight in the balls!
Frankie: That cheating filth!
Greyson: It’s aaall legal in a Street Fight, Frankie.
The blow to the groin has caused Orlando to drop the brass knuckles so he can cup his hands around his balls. He jumps around clasping at his swollen dick but he should have been using his hands to protect another head. As Orlando turns back towards his opponent he realizes that his brass knuckles have found their way around Marina’s fist. She nails a punch right between Orlando’s eyes, the brass knuckles busting him in the skull.
Greyson: Brass knuckles right between Orlando’s eyes!!
Marina doesn’t stop there, dropping the brass knuckles and then falling into the nearby turnbuckle. Every muscle in her body feels like it weighs hundreds and hundreds of pounds as she gets to the top rope then comes flying out of it. She hurdles into Orlando’s body with the force of a meteorite hitting the earth. The California Splash connects across Orlando’s ribs and drives every last bit of fight out of him.
Greyson: The California Splash! It connected! It finally connected!
Sparkles: After Orlando took that shot from the knucks right in the face.
It takes whatever Marina has left to hook Orlando’s legs.
The crowd is going absolutely apeshit, monkey-balls mad at the sight of Marina scoring yet another in a series of career defining victories.
Marina ends up on her back with her hands on her jaw and one arm raised in victory. Her body is depleted of energy and totally drained of strength, yet she has to do it, she has to enjoy the personal validation she feels as a result of this victory. She crawls into the corner, uses it to stand and then pumps her fists out to her sides. Meanwhile Orlando is being helped out of the ring by his Monarchy brethren Ryan Watson. The second that Watson tries to get into the ring and attack an unsuspecting Marina, Orlando grabs him by the wrist and keeps him from doing it. He now blows off Marina and almost trips over his own feet when staggering up the ramp.
Greyson: It was a hell of a fight between Marina and Orlando tonight but in the end….
Frankie: Marina cheats her way to a win.
Greyson: Rather you want to accept reality or not, Frankie, Marina has just defeated a Phenom.
Sparkles: Just think of how much momentum she’ll carry into Last Stand.
Cameras cut from Marina as she enjoys a well-deserved celebration and to the cage that is hanging above her.
Greyson: Well it’s hard to believe, but this roller coaster is almost over.
Sparkles: Marina celebrating her win, and who is going to be celebrating after the 3 on 2 Steel Cage match?
Frankie: I don’t think anyone is going to be in any type of shape to celebrate once Tay and Mika have taken on New Eden in that satanic structure.
Greyson: Taylor Chase and Mika Kozlov team up against Serenity, Cassidy Haze and Cindy Todd in a Steel Cage.
Douglas: Where are you going?
Not very far.
Katelyn Buehler employs all the boxes and crates lining the walls in order to limp along down the corridor that leads to the squared circle. All of the injuries that were inflicted on her earlier in the night by Mika Kozlov and Taylor Chase make it impossible to stand, let alone walk, especially into a battle. In the background we can see her agent Dan Douglas and her friend Destiny Nichols trailing behind her, desperately trying to reason with the World Champion. They get just as far as Katelyn does.
Douglas: WHERE…ARE YOU…GOING!?!
Katelyn: Not to the hospital.
Douglas reaches out for her good arm but Katelyn pulls it away.
Katelyn: And I’m not going anywhere with YOU.
The incendiary tone of the champion leaves Douglas…confused.
Katelyn: You….you promised me….
Douglas: What are you talking about?
Katelyn: You promised me you’d never lie to me.
Douglas: I never….
His eyes veer towards Destiny, who was very quiet for a reason. She tries to hide the guilty expression on her face, but Douglas can read her body language.
Douglas: What did you tell her?
Katelyn: What you wouldn’t.
Katelyn tries to make it one step further but almost falls.
Douglas: (Trying to catch Katelyn) Let me help you.
Katelyn: (Pushing away) I’ve had enough of your help.
Douglas: That’s all I was trying to do….
Katelyn: By programming me to AMBUSH Lexy?
Douglas: I-I-I had my reasons….I’m sorry….
Katelyn: I won’t be. If Tay and Mika are gonna be in that cage, then I’m gonna be in there with them.
Douglas: Look-look-look at your arm. It’s damn near shattered! You can’t go out there.
Katelyn: I ‘can’t?’ I thought we had this discussion before, Dan. You don’t tell me what I can and can’t do.
Although the act of standing is downright debilitating Katelyn manages to do it. She walks with determination down the hallway, leaving Douglas stood in the background burying his lips behind the side of his fist.
Douglas opens the fist he had clinched and pressed to his lips, allowing a golden talisman to hang down from his palm by a chain. The word he just uttered has a transformative effect on the World Champion. She comes to an abrupt halt, her whole body suddenly paralyzed save for the giant smile that is coming to her cheeks. Douglas gives Destiny a frown before he approaches Katelyn and brings his hand to a rest on her shoulder.
Douglas: You’re not going anywhere near that ring tonight.
Katelyn: Of course I’m not, why would I?
Douglas: And you’re going to forget everything that Destiny just told you.
Katelyn: Already forgotten.
The trainer’s office comes into view where someone is tucked away inside receiving some medical assistance. We get a bit more clarity as to the identity of whomever is inside of said room when the door opens and Taylor Chase comes stepping out. A frown is worn on her face upon being greeted in the hallway by the last person she would expect to take such a vested interest in her well-being. Her sister Mika Kozlov is stood just off to the side of the room that Tay just vacated, leaning with her back to the wall and the jagged points of her nails raised in front of her face, examining the small slivers of flesh beneath them.
Mika: Is your man-meat still in one piece?
Taylor: Don’t worry about Lando, he’s a quick healer. Let’s just hope that Cindy, Cassidy and Serenity….aren’t.
Mika: Let us make them feel even worse than Pasty Katie.
Taylor: It’s finally time for the family reunion….
Tay walks off towards the ring where New Eden will be waiting for her inside of a Steel Cage. Mika lingers behind in the hall, making one final comment before the match can get underway, a comment that she couldn’t make in her sister’s company.
Mika: Oh yes….it’s time.
The squared circle is surrounded by four walls of intimidating steel mesh. The demonic structure is prepared and five bodies are about to be locked inside of it.
Sparkles: Guys, it’s cage match time.
Greyson: I’m nervous….very-very nervous.
Frankie: Yeah, my stomach is churning as we speak, and for once it’s not because of White Castles.
Greyson: This has been building for several weeks now, Mika Kozlov and Taylor Chase have been growing closer and closer together as they head into their triple threat World Title match against Katelyn Buehler. Unfortunately that reconciliation between these long estranged sisters has put them on a collision course with the group New Eden.
Sparkles: Cindy Todd has been adamant about bringing Mika back into her group and it led to an INCINDIARY situation earlier tonight.
Greyson: Mika Kozlov saved Tay from a New Eden assault by tossing a fireball in Cindy’s face. At last confirming where her allegiances are, and there with Taylor Chase.
Sparkles: Let’s see how strong that bond is between Tay and Mika when they face New Eden three on two inside of the cage.
MIKA KOZLOV & TAYLOR CHASE VS. NEW EDEN:
STEEL CAGE HANDICAP MATCH
The tunes of ‘Judge & Jury’ are amplified by the PA system, causing a twinge of terror to be exhibited by the audience. They shudder with fear at the sight of Serenity leading New Eden down the ramp and into a cage. As Serenity slithers along she’s followed by Cassidy Haze, who hasn’t bothered to plug her busted nostrils, blood still seeping down into her mouth. Of course Cassidy isn’t the only one who is carrying a few wounds into this contest. A bandage remains crudely wrapped around half of Cindy Todd’s face, protecting the scorched flesh that is hidden beneath it. Neither Cindy nor Cassidy care about their injuries, they only care about getting their hands on Taylor Chase and Mika Kozlov within the confines of the cage. Once inside of the steel structure Serenity climbs to the very top of one of the walls and throws her leg over. She shows no fear of heights or of the challenge set to face her.
Greyson: New Eden are in a…mood.
Sparkles: This night hasn’t gone the best for Cindy Todd and company.
Greyson: Not only is Cindy coming into this match with burnt flesh, but Cassidy Haze has a potentially broken nose after having a ladder driven into it by Marina Valdivia.
Frankie: I hear that Cindy’s burns aren’t serious but I still fear that these three are going to channel all their pain and all their anger into the beating they’ll give my girl Tay and my back-up babe Mika Kozlov.
Greyson: Oh, I would count on a beating coming Kozlov’s and Tay’s way.
Cindy paces the ring with just one of her eyes visible beneath her bandaging, and that eye is locked on the stage. She refuses to blink until she sees her opponents in this cage bout. She won’t have to wait long.
The tunes of ‘Boss’s Daughter’ come blaring through the arena and in a rare display of solidarity, Taylor Chase AND Mika Kozlov emerge from the back TOGRTHER. To show that they are TRULY united the long-time rivals but almost life-long adoptive sisters interlock hands and start to skip together towards the cage.
Greyson: This is almost too far-fetched to believe. Mika and Tay being on the same page, it’s mind boggling.
Frankie: I know, that’s like Mohammed Ali and Smoking Joe Frazier getting on the same page, or Lindsey Lohan getting on the same page with sobriety.
Greyson: The last time these two were in a cage with one another they were tearing each other apart as opponents. That makes it even harder to believe that they’ll walking into THIS cage as partners.
Sparkles: New Eden will definitely test the strength of that bond. Remember Tay scored a shocking pin when she took on Cassidy and Serenity earlier tonight in a triple threat match, that can’t be sitting well with New Eden at all.
Tay determinedly marches up the steel steps and is the first to enter the cage with three of the most sadistic women in professional wrestling. Mika takes the honors of holding the cage door open for her sister and watching with pride as Tay marches into the ring.
Sparkles: That’s nice of Mika to hold that cage door open for her sister. She knows how badly Tay wants New Eden.
Greyson: Tay really wants to rip New Eden apart after the way they assaulted her after that match you mentioned, Sparkles.
Frankie: She’s about to get a piece and so….uhhhh….I think Mika might be confused.
The cage door that Mika was holding open Mika is now closing. The only problem is, she’s still OUTSIDE of the cage when she closes said door.
Mika: Oooooh sestra…
Tay was so focused on the three women in the ring with her that she wasn’t paying attention to her sister outside of it. Not until she hears the door behind her back slam shut and the sounds of mesh clanking against steel. Tay whips around just in time to see Mika remove a padlock from her tights and using it to bar the cage door.
Taylor: (Looking through the mesh that separates her from her ‘partner’) What are you doing?
Mika: Relax sestra. (Walking away from the cage) You got this….hehehehehe.
Mika winks at her sister and then waves goodbye, moving from the cage that she just locked Taylor inside of.
Greyson: Oh no….oooooh no.
Sparkles: Did Mika just….?
Greyson: She just locked Taylor inside of that cage with New Eden and now she’s abandoning her.
Frankie: Where are you going Mika!?! You’re supposed to be Tay’s partner. She’s counting on you!
Sparkles: Mika has just fed her sister to the wolves.
Greyson: This was all a set-up! A set-up cleverly orchestrated by Kozlov.
A laughing Mika backs up the ramp waving goodbye to Tay and then blowing her a kiss. Taylor frantically shakes the door to the cage, trying to break the lock that has just trapped her in the confines of the steel structure with three blood thirsty opponents. Cindy wants to get her hands on Mika, but she’ll indulge her cravings for chaos by ripping the flesh from Tay’s body. She, Serenity and Cassidy inch forward from their corner of the ring and like a pack of wolves they begin to surround their prey. Finally Tay turns away from the door and to the feral beasts that urge to devour her.
Frankie: What have you done Mika!?! What’s wrong with you!!??!!
Greyson: It would be easier to ask what’s ‘right’ with Mika.
Sparkles: She’s locked her own sister in that cage with three deranged psychopaths, three deranged psychopaths that Mika whipped up into a frenzy. Mika planned this out masterfully.
Tay breaths heavy as the realization sets in that she’s all on her own with New Eden. She tentatively backs away from the ladies and finds herself getting closer and closer to the corner. New Eden are drawing nearer, enjoying the smell of her fear.
Begs Tay while holding her palms out in front of her.
Taylor: I did promise a FAMILY REUNION tonight.
The moment Tay finishes her sentence two figures start towards the cage. From opposite ends of the crowd two ladies have emerged. Before anyone has time to react to their arrival these women are jumping onto either side of the cage and scaling the walls.
Greyson: Wait-wait-wait, is that-is that….
Frankie: It’s Madison Chase! It’s-it’s Cameron Chase! It’s-it’s Tay-Tay’s biological sisters!
Sparkles: Holy smoking macaroni!
The fans are absolutely flipping out as they realize that THIS was the family reunion Tay had been promising throughout the evening. And what a reunion it’s going to be. Madison reaches the top of the cage at the same time as Cameron, yet neither lady stays up there for long. They are descending into the ring where Tay is waiting for her sisters.
The roles have suddenly been reversed, New Eden going from surrounding Tay to being surrounded themselves. Instead of expressing fear in the face of danger, New Eden revels in it.
Serenity: Play time!
Serenity and Madison meet in the middle of the ring exchanging punches.
Cassidy and Cameron meet in the middle of the ring exchanging punches.
Cindy and Taylor meet in the middle of the ring exchanging punches.
Punches are just flying everywhere and connecting with everyone as this brawl consumes the CAGE.
Greyson: Who thought the night would end like this?
Sparkles: It’s a brawl….a friggin brawl between New Eden and the Chase sisters.
Frankie: What a chaotic, and SEXY way to end this week’s Riot.
Greyson: What does all of this mean for Last Stand? We’ll find out in TWO WEEKS on pay-per-view!
FADE TO BLACK